Prepare thyself, he who reads this, to tremble and quake before the Incredible Word of God, as written by THE LORD HIMSELF!
St. Patrick’s Day is this week, and I would like to mark the occasion by remembering that I hate the insufferable Irish.
In the first place, St. Patrick is an asshole. He gets wasted drunk and pisses all over Heaven every damn night. More than once I’ve had to beat him into unconsciousness.
But that doesn’t matter, because St. Patrick’s Day is not about St. Patrick. It’s about being proud of being Irish. And the only way to get that feeling is to get hammered drunk and puke your guts out.
Why do the Irish need a day to take pride in themselves? Because they suffer from low self-esteem. AND WELL THEY SHOULD!
I’ve always hated the Irish! That’s why I made them all hideously deformed monsters that frighten children. I also gave them sickly pale skin to keep them terrified of My sun, for I do not deem them worthy of sunlight.
I warn you humans! Do not have sex with Irish! They have syphilis! And they are awful at sex! Have you ever seen riverdance?! That’s how the Irish fuck!
Bunch of fire-crotched freaks are all miserable drunks. They drink because they know I hate them! The separation from My Divine Awesomeness is too much for them to bear, so they have to drown their sorrows in whisky and Guinness.
They know I hate them, and so for thousands of years the Irish have worked for Satan, laundering his money and pimping out his leprechaun whores. I can sense confusion in your rotting mortal brain, so I shall elaborate.
Leprechauns are agents of Satan that trick you into thinking you’ll get a pot of gold if you only have anal sex with them. This is why the pot of gold is always pictured at the end of a rainbow. The rainbow represents the gay sex with a leprechaun you must have to get the filthy Irish gold.
Here’s a little secret: when you butt-fuck the leprechaun you don’t get any gold. You just get your dick covered in leprechaun shit and a room reservation in hell.
I HATE THE IRISH SO MUCH!
This is why I’ve had them fighting each other in Northern Ireland for decades. Whether or not they be Catholic or Protestant matters not to Me; I just enjoy watching them kill each other.
Stupid Irish! You think that because you dress in green, drink green, and piss green that you own the color green? WELL, YOU FUCKING DON’T!
Green is MY color, understand? I made almost everything on your stupid planet green, because green is MY favorite color. I OWN IT! And I can take it away any time I please.
But you know what I hate the most about the Irish? How they all try to cash in on the fact that I hate them. If you see someone this week wearing a button or shirt that says “Kiss me, I’m Irish,” PUNCH THEM IN THE FUCKING FACE!
I, The Almighty Lord, have spoken.
Naytheist on 
Foppl's Siege Party on 
Obie on 
Hume Cronyn on 
Assfly on 
Willy on 
tc on 
The Shitty Astrologer on 
Dexquisite on 
Dear God,
Of all Your creations, the Irish are without a doubt the ultimate choice of objects for hatred. Stupid, ugly and most always drunk.
May You smite them with perpetual “troubles” in their sorry-ass homeland and the rest of the world.
“I made almost everything on your stupid planet..”
Oh mighty God. Forgive my blasphemy, but what specifically haven’t you created. Was it the Osbourne family? I wouldn’t claim them either…
Bryce,
You’re not being blasphemous, you’re just being an idiot who lacks the proper level of reading comprehension to understand what that statement actually meant.
God,
I like how You made the main picture one of Ben! Your smiting of him will never end!!!
God, I defaced all the ‘Kiss Me I’m Irish’ bumper stickers I can find, changing them to ‘Kick Me I’m Irish’
Josh, that’s Ben? If I saw him, I’d punch him out.
No jury in the world would convict me.
Is it time to drag out all the Irish jokes?
What’s three miles long and has an IQ of 60? The St. Paddy’s Day Parade in NYC.
God, thank You for making my lumbs green too!
i appreciate that!
And that´s Ben, on the main picture, a 38 years old fuck face Irish…
‘lumbs’?
uahuahuah…
i knew that was wrong, i pressed the wrong letters…
it´s lungs “danm it”!!
whatever…
Green lungs? Doesn’t sound healthy, doc.
Who is the doctor here ?
LOL - point!
As long as you are here…it hurts when I look at Ben.
What is the treatment?
Bryce - You damned dirty Irishman! You lascivious drunkard! SHIT! Learn to fucking read. DAMN YOU!
He’s Irish, God. Did You, in Your omnipotence, make him Irish as punishment even before he was born?
Yes I did, but that is not enough. Not nearly enough! Now I will have to smite him some more. Now he will get seriously injured in a hit-and-run accident. Kelly Osbourne will smash into him with her Cadillac Escalade.
This is soooo true. God hates my people. That’s why He took away all their potatoes and made them starve. He always kicks the Irish when they’re down, as do the rest of His mortals.
God,
My button says “Fuck me, I’m Irish”. Is this acceptable as I have syphillis and will therefore bring about the painful death of any heathen stupid enough to fuck an Irish person? I don’t mind everybody here knowing that I am hideously deformed but I don’t want to get punched in the face repeatedly this week. Honestly, that happens enough when I have sex.
Yes, that is why there was a potato famine. I reduced the Irish population by 25%. Ah, those were good times.
As for you Nun, no this is not acceptable. You are a woman, and you are Irish. As much as I love you, that’s two strikes already. Take off the button and renounce your heritage, then you may fuck strangers again. And stop whining and take your punches like a woman.
What’s an Irishman’s idea of foreplay? “Brace yourself, Bridgette!”
Are You going to take away the Irish syphillis and the hideous deformities, O Lordly One?
No.
God’s Divine Work…
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090316/ap_on_re_eu/eu_northern_ireland
“Have you ever seen riverdance?! That’s how the Irish fuck!”
i spit coffee onto my keyboard. now i have to swap keyboards with some heathen who doesn’t read His Divine Blog.
http://www.amazon.com/Brace-Yourself-Bridget-Official-Manual/dp/0312094302
Then I apologize in advance for my insolence, O Dear Lord but I will not renounce my heritage. As I’m hideously deformed and I have the Irish syphillis, the only people that will fuck me are the stinking Irish. ‘Fucking strangers’ is just a Divine Tease that will never come true, unless they’re Irish and are also hideously deformed and riddled with the Irish syphillis.
heheh… I find this funnier than I should. Probably because I’m a hideously deformed and sinful Irish woman.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29685956/?GT1=43001
This is Anne
Thanks for hating on white people for a change! My daughter Teenzilla is 1/2 Irish, which explains everything.
well, it explains half of everything.
hilarious work smite today, Sir. gotta admit, i didn’t see that coming!
with all the righteous irish hatred, what’s with the blessing of the boston sports teams? i don’t get it. but i’m a stupid mortal.
cracka, you should be castrated, and never have a human beeing like you (a fucking son) again in this shitty planet.
not talking about their ugliness….
Dear Lord, i promise that i will never fuck Irish women again…
But different from the Irish men, the Irish Women is very sexy, and have a very tight pinky little pussy….
Anne got the evil Irish syphillis from a hideously deformed Irish man. She also got evil Irish spawn.
and i really enjoy nail those kind of pussy…
said.
you know the guys who hand out flyers and pamphlets on the street? it’s like they’re saying, “i don’t have time to throw this away, you do it.”
said.
i think herbman was attempting some sort of latin FACE. instead he just gave me a new SGH catch phrase.
said.
Anne got evil everything from everywhere…
just like bridgette…
Damn Whores…
Thank You God for making me imune to sexual diseases…
Thank You VERY much.
I don’t understand a damn word that Herbman says. I do get that he’s a pervert though.
said.
sgh ?
that stands for stinky-glove-hand, herbman.
“evil everything from everywhere”
you must be some kind of savant, herbman.
because that is genius.
said.
i said that cracka should be castrated because should never ever ever ever ever born a child with his features again in the world.
i only speak engrish…
sorry.
*mas se voce quiser eu posso mandar voce tomar no seu cú nojento. Assim, bem facil e em portugues… =)
and thank you cracka, that´s why im a doctor and you are a homeless…
i already told you to don´t put that glove in your ass again cracka….
why you are so stupid ?
said.
“Here’s a little secret: when you butt-fuck the leprechaun you don’t get any gold.”
Thanks God, this made my day.
“evil everything from everywhere”
Loves it!
Do you think Herbman means
word????
yeah, AP, this is a classic post.
engrish.
said.
nun-27.
i gotta tell ya, my initial response was laughter, too.
I’m going to shoot my neighbor and then say I thought he was a monkey. He’s black so people will believe me.
#27 - In Brazil when they do that, they eat you. Don’t want to waste meat.
ben-bot must be really hurt by the picture because he hasn’t shown up yet today to be told to shut up.
nun, i’m going to take that a step further and shoot evrery black person i see. when i go on trial i’m going to tell the tale of the evil monkey invasion. state hospital, here i come!!
shit. i just offended myself again.
said.
Anne johnson:
Brazil is one of the largest exporters of meat…
And cracka, im happy that Ben doesn´t show up yet i think…
don´t steal my words cracka boy…
said.
ps: “said.” it´s my!!!
“I’m gonna get me a shotgun and shoot all the whiteys I see”. Best Garrett Morris line ever uttered on SNL. As for me myself, I’m gonna get me a shotgun and shoot all the monkeys, aka black people, I see.
said
As for Ben, is that really him in that picture? I don’t think it is.
“got the blue berry yum yum and mr. fire… ”
=)
Dr. Herb, meat exports cut mean down forests of rain so nowhere parrots live but cages in.
Cracka, where you been, dude? God banned Ben from commenting. Yep, gave him the Divine Shut Up Command.
And if that wasn’t enough good news, go to the previous post and see who got quickened at 100. Priceless.
hmmm…
looks like i missed out on something or other.
here i go.
you don´t worth it anne freaking johnson….
I’m being dissed by a weed. Classic.
holy crap. that was hilarious.
why do i miss out on that stuff?
cuz you bright not
said
and why can’t people just eat a freakin’ girl scout cookie with saying something stupid?
get me away from them before i eat the whole box!!
shut up, fatty. it’s a fucking cookie, fatty.
shut up, ben.
said.
r u nuts cracka ?
What kind of stupid stuff, cracka? When I eat a box of GS cookies, I don’t talk - I might spew out a cloud of crumbs, and it’s a pain in the azz to clean them out of the keyboard.
said.
Wowzer - I looked over the weekend postings, guess I should check in to see the good stuff!
Anne, Dr Herb is secretly thinking about you naked.
said skyward.
I’m secretly thinking about him rolled, lit, and inhaled.
You ‘n Nun both!
don´t pass that over Yo Yo … be a “man” for once in your shitty life…
I wonder - will Ben will find an Internet cafe (different IP address) and come back here?
Swear to Him, I feel like I’m on serious weed this afternoon, and I don’t toke. I can’t fuckin keep my eyes open. Damn daylight savings time!
You are right, Herb.
Anne - I think about you naked, too.
said skyward, Anne.
Daylight savings time in Brazil: just cut down some more forest.
have you ever taken an afternoon nap……..ON WEED?!!
i have already did everything with our friend Nun… but anne johnson make me sick!
Yo Yo, say it skyclad! Then we’ll PARTY!!!
Hey Dr. Herbman, if you feel sick, just smoke yourself.
Cracka, you probably weren’t born the last time I smoked weed.
Anne, can we wait until May? Skyclad in Maine, even in march, can cause frostnip.
you smoked dry dog shit bitch.
Herbman and I did do everything and then I gave him the Irish syphillis. Sorry, doctor. My fault no, God’s blame.
said
’smoke yourself’ HAHAHAHAHA!
Always with the euphemisms!
Did I smoke dried dog shit? Christ, no wonder I’m so sleepy!
And I guess it’s me who left that puddle over by the fire hydrant. Side effect.
no problem Nun… as i said, God made me imune to sexual diseases…
sorry for overflowed your asshole!
anne johnson, please shut the fuck up ?
and it was from a pitbull…
“sorry for overflowed your asshole!”
this guy is brilliant.
herbert, dogshit is dogshit.
No, Cracka, you’re wrong about dogshit. Some shit is better than others. Pit bull, smoked regularly, gives you big muscles, zits, and a Chris Brown level of anger management.
Hey, we’re cummin to 100! Bridgette! Bridgette!
Where’s Our Lady of the Hippos today?
If Chris Brown was more like Wayne Brady then people wouldn’t be hating on him so bad. Wayne Brady is cute when he chokes a bitch.
anne johnson, GO TAKE YOUR PILLS FREAK!
thank you cracka, i know you love me…
I ran out of pills. What’s your problem?
THERE CAN BE———————–
ONE ONYL!!!
said.
dan mit.
carka, stop steeling the thickening.
It don’t matter none. You can’t thicken something that don’t exist.
BAM!!
FACE!
THICKENING FACE!!
Now Cracka should cry and say that we’re all mean and we’re not funny.
We’re waiting, Carka. Have a hissy fit, or else!
Ah, Cracka can take it. He may not have much of a wiener, but he’s no whiner.
I just don’t get Ben and his pussyish behavior. I thought he had a handle on how we talk around here and then he goes and fags out bigger than the faggiest queen I’ve ever met.
What’s to get? He’s a fag.
said
There’s no question that he wigged out at you, Nun. He probably got an early start on the Irish whiskey. I thought he understood us too. But maybe he was just a touchy red-haired queen.
sad.
Now we have to tell him to shut up in absentia.
Shut up, Ben, wherever you are.
I feckin knew it ya old bastard. Of all the fecking saints, ya smote me with these people.
I’m tired of them using my name like they got something to be proud of.
I hate the pussy Irish almost as much as I hate anne johnson.
shut up, ben.
shut up forever.
(sniffle, sniffle)
smoggy?
And Curtis, for lunch today we had Italian wedding soup.
HEY ST. PATTY-FATTY, I HATE YOU TOO MUTHAFUCKA! GUESS WHAT, PUSSY? I’M WEARING ORANGE TOMORROW! I DO IT EVERY YEAR! PROUD TO BE AN ORANGEMAN, YO. WORD. BRING IT.
That’s the true meaning of this awful day. Killing anyone who wears orange because they’re a baby-eating, tree-fucking druid.
Everybody hates my people.
If you all truly want Ben back, let Me know and I will lift his ban, allowing him to comment again. He has already prayed to Me twice asking for this.
CONSIDER CAREFULLY! And don’t forget that he is fat and annoying.
I vote that we make him grovel like an egg-sucking dog for a week or two or maybe more.
said.
Ben’s nothing but one of those pussy bitches who scream and cry ‘we’re done!!’ and the next day they act like nothing happened. What a fucking drama-queen fag.
supported Nun…
Ben is a real drama-queen fag…
He can return if he promises to take his Midol.
Dear God,
We here in beautiful Noo Zillund hate the Irish too because of the way they act like they own our ‘Clean Green’ image. So this St Patrick’s day I have fed my whole flock of sheep green emetics and had them shit in the nation’s largest vat of Guinness. It is a fine, thick and pungent brew, and I am serving it to anyone who claims Irish blood. Here is my advertising jingle:
If you’re worshippin’ the old Saint called Pat,
Then get your free pint from my vat!
“It’s thick, dark and green”
Said the Heavenly Queen,
“And smells just like God would’ve shat.”
Your servant Smoggy
Amen
I think God should decide if He wants a drama-queen pussy fag boy on His Divine Blog. Somebody who shows clear signs of PMSing while at the same time claiming they have a penis hanging between their pussy fag boy legs.
I ALREADY DID DECIDE! I BANISHED HIM!
And then you weak mortals start lamenting his passing! Well he’s not coming back. I will not have morons like that stain My Divine Blog any longer.
YOU ALMOST MADE ME FORGET I DON’T FORGIVE ANYMORE!
Yeah Dear God…
I told You someday that you were getting soft…
and Don´t!! Ben is no worth it….
he is the most ridiculous human beeing in the world.
God: 2,389,8765,765,321
Ben: 0
Rubba dub dub
thanks for the grub
yea God.
Ben: -9,984,322,444…
I don’t know why you want Ben gone–he makes most of you look intelligent, when by and large you are moronic fuckwits.
Yours in Christian Love
S. Batzrubble
so go suck his dumb dick, asshole…
God, Thank You one more time…
Just got my blood test, not even high colesterol…
My imunnity against sexual diseases it´s prooved… i fucked hundreds of cheap prostitutes on my last visit to Tihuana…
Now i´m feeling good… gotta take my green stripe medicine now…
Good night.
Wow Herby, you’re a stud–all those little tihuana bumboys with sore assholes must be glad you’re back on the wagon.
Thank You Heavenly Father…
After living in Savannah Georgia, and now in Chicago, I’ve had to endure these You Damned parades for 9 years.
Can’t get through town because fuck-tards want to see food coloring in a river.
The craziest part is that most of the people celebrating this day are of a darker skin, because the real Irish have already passed out in the gutter with their pants down.
Dear God,
Do You hate Ireland more than Africa?
Dear God,
I was not lamenting Ben’s passing. I just wanted to clear that up.
P.S. Yeah to what Christian said… which earns more of God’s Divine Wrath… Ireland and it’s stinkin’ potatoes and stinky drunk people or Africa with it’s angry darkies?
They both suck.
Christian - No. I don’t hate the land mass I created which is now called Ireland, I am rather proud of that. I just hate the people that inhabit it.
With Africa, I hate everything - the continent, the people, the culture, EVERYTHING.
I love the way God hates.
Dear God, please help me to be a better hater.
Smog
Where the fuck is cracka–does he still live here? And why have you driven Curtis away? And who is this herbwoman cunt? And has Hume Cronyn still got my broom up his arse?
FFS–I go into exile for a few weeks, and pondweed invades God’s blog! Thank Christ that at least God is still an angry bastard–I’d be pretty pissed if He’d changed as well!
God, is it a democracy now?
You put the decision to bring Ben back in our hands.
Well, I think he should come back.
I know he is a pussy, a fag, a drama queen but we all could make fun of that.
G’Day, Smoggy. Your sheep stink like a rotten potato in an Irishman’s underwear!
God, how much do You hate the Black Irish?
’strewth, L Woman. Ben’s all that and a bag of cowchips. But it’s a role he’s comfortable in.
Yo - No more than I do white Irish. I do not hate someone based on their skin color. There are a great many Africans with white skin (10,012 to be exact) and I hate them just as much as the ones with black skin.
Now someone who has one parent from an African country, and one from Ireland, well I hate them A LOT.
Yikes - Obama has Irish roots!
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/us_and_americas/article1512094.ece
Should I move to Noo Ziiland?
ARRGGHH!! I FUCKING HATE OBAMA!!
My boss is Irish.
Don’t be a fag, Smoggy. Nobody put Curtis in a gay limo and drove him away to gayland. He walked away on his own accord when he couldn’t censor God’s Holy Blog. Ben cried and stomped away when he had a bad case of PMS.
I watched Trading Places last night. I forgot how fucking funny that movie is. Don Ameche calling Eddie Murphy a “neeeegro”… HA!!
Today is my people’s day, the people that God hates. But that’s okay because my people like to drink a lot so they won’t even remember that God hates them.
God,
I know You despise Africa so maybe this is part of Your Divine Plan but Your current Pope is a moronic fuckhole…
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090317/ap_on_re_af/af_pope_africa
Well as I said in a recent post, I hate the Pope. However, if he keeps saying great things like that he just might eventually work his way back into My good graces.
we need ben. it doesn’t sound right telling yoyo to shut up.
trading smoggy and curtis
for herb and L was a tragic turn of events also.
said, bitches.
Cracka’s just racist and hates the dark-skinned beautiful people from Brazil.
God,
Why did You start hating on Obama? Or is that fodder for a future Divine Post?
stop whining cracka, as i said before, be a man…
If you like them so much buy them a ticket and take them to your home and feed those mother fuckers!
said.
#89:
Thank You God.
Shut up, Doc.
That’s almost as good as shut up ben - give it a try, cracka.
I wonder if it’s divine comment of the day because you showed your graciousness to God or if it’s because you overflowed my anus with your Brazillian seed. God’s a Divine Conundrum… He hates anal but you get divine comment of the day. Go figure.
Could God be softening you up before He smites you, Nun?
He smited me with life, Yo.
I never thought of it that way. God would smite the ones He loves quickly, leaving the rest of of us to slog through life!
I declared #89 divine because it made Me laugh. I know he didn’t actually do anal unto you. He lives thousands of miles away.
God, I was in my state’s capitol yesterday, I stopped at Duncan Donuts, as I often do. I didn’t realize the name of the street it’s located on until I looked at my receipt.
Gaywalk Street.
My anus promptly overflowed.
Here’s the location in Google Maps:
http://maps.google.com/maps?f=q&source=s_q&hl=en&geocode=&q=gaywalk+street+Augusta+ME&sll=37.0625,-95.677068&sspn=32.527387,56.25&ie=UTF8&ll=44.336649,-69.792216&spn=0,359.986267&z=16&iwloc=addr&layer=c&cbll=44.336655,-69.792324&panoid=CKRJghgJK4zJRs5si4tI-g&cbp=12,319.0253409601186,,0,10.062500000000003
What the fuck!! Who left their mother fucking Brazillian seed in my asshole??
I feel so violated.
Doc, you got some explaining to do!
shut up, doc.
nope.
fondue?
(sigh)
i laughing for overflow your anus to, God.
Herbman asked me how my anus was doing. Angry, I told him “Shut up!”
He said, “Wish mine was, it’s been overflowing!”
said
Lunch: Cup Noodles and some Dunkin Donuts I scored from the conference room. (not the DD on Gaywalk Street!)
Nun is a promiscuous slut and i don´t need to explain shit…
said.
Dear Lord,
As you see, Ben should come back.
People miss somebody to say shut up. And it’s not fair to do it with each other.
But Ben, is the choosen one for that fate.
Most of us don’t confess but the truth is: We miss our drama queen Ben.
That’s so gay!
God, is this the real Ben, or a life-like avatar?
either way, it should shut up.
AAAAAAAAH…
that felt good.
said.
You’ve been building that up for days, cracka!
Dear God,
I’ve been printing your posts and spreading your words everywhere.
A lot of my friends are already reading your holy blog.
As I don’t need extra inches, could you send me Jeniffer Beals for one night.
I just love her. She is HOT, HOT, HOT. Have you seen her in The L Word?
Please Almighty, send me Jeniffer Beals for just one night!
Amen.
Crap. I should throw a fit and threaten to leave.
you are a sick form of life cracka
Ben….
Welcome back!
I missed you!
God, i want to know when is the next bob marley concert in heaven…
Thank You.
L Woman is a fag.
i thought she was a dike?
supported.
The Tree Gods would forgive Ben, but when he died they would reincarnate him as a mushroom. He would spend his youth in a dark shit-hole and then get eaten.
All hail the Tree Gods!
she is a fag-lesbo
or a lesbo-fag
whatever…
What Ben was doing whilst banished: http://mitchieville.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/ratmouth.bmp
Does anyone even know what Jennifer Beals looks like now? Be careful what you wish for, L.
underwired.
L Woman, maybe God will grant you another cup size, instead of inches.
Don’t you read God’s Divine Posts, Cracka. “Fag” does not necessarily mean “gay man”. L Woman is a fag because of her love for faggy Ben.
So…if we hate Ben, what are we?
I’m fag because I said wellcome back to Ben?
Or because I love Jennifer Beals?
Loving Jennifer Beals makes you a fan. Wanting to munch her carpet makes you lesbo. I love me some Gillian Anderson but I don’t want to lick her twat. Loving Ben makes you a fag.
I hope that clears everything up.
said
Anne - Jennifer Beal looks great, you should check her on the lesbian show “The L Word”.
OK - maybe Ben was doing this: http://mitchieville.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/sin.bmp
Nun - I don’t love Ben. I just missed him.
C’mon, don’t tell me you don’t have fun when he has a drama queen moment.
It’s hilarious!
And when he is whining and he has nothing else to say then “fuck you” to everybody?
Don’t tell me you don’t have fun with that!
Ben may get mad and quit again, after hearing/seeing all the love we have for him.
You guys love me? Oh that’s all I ever wanted to hear!
Shut up Ben.
Of course we don’t love Ben.
Smile, you’re on Candid Camera.
Now that we made you a fool once again, you can leave.
SHIT FUCKING FUCKITY FUCK FUCK FUCK!!!
ERROR! ERROR!
10 MINUTES TILL SELF-DESTRUCT!
DAMNIT, YOYO!!!
you stole the quickening. i thought you were too old to fuck anyway. what are you stealing inches for?
Please don’t blanket all of us with Ben-love, robot. I don’t think highly of people who cross the line between humor and temper at the blink of an eye.
Yo Yo’s not too old to fuck, he’s too old to fuck outside in the cold Maine weather. Which makes him a wise man, and they’re fun to fuck.
LOL, Anne, I have unsampled potato vodka I have concealed in the toolbox of my tractor. Come to frozen Maine, make beatiful music with me!
Lord,
What about Beals???
Can I have her tonight?
Sorry cracka, I wondered why I had trouble zipping up, also wasn’t sure why sexretary followed me into bathroom.
L-Woman - I appreciate your evangelism greatly. You shall have Beals to yourself this very night!
haha! L-Woman is noob. she doesn’t know that God’s blessings are usually drenched with sick humor. she’ll get it tonight, though, when beals show up on her front door in a giant ziploc bag all chopped up! or when she shows up to reveal her gigantic schlong! or when some other chick named beals shows up but looks a lot more like wilford brimley than beals!
oh, i wish i could be there.
i love pointing and laughing!
(cue nun with a penis joke)
Can I join them, God?
“oh, i wish i could be there.”
You will be, cracka - I mean, Beals.
Poor L Woman. She should have learned before she leaped. Now Bei Shen wants to join them. He’d be better off joining the Army.
Dear Almighty,
Thank you very much for being so great!
I will always spread your word.
Your illiterate humble servent.
Amen!
Ok, tomorrow I’ll tell you what happened
Bei Shen - get the fuck out of here. Did you understand that?
Anne,
# 209… supported.
said
As for poor Bei, he’ll be just like Ross when he had a threesome with his wife and that chick. He’ll end up making himself a sandwich and watching as he won’t be needed.
Cracka - I’ll make a video and post it on You Tube.
Yeah Nun… said
Yo Yo, I’m on the next plane. My husband is Irish, and he asked me to cook corned beef and cabbage. It smells like boiled garbage in my kitchen.
Did anyone notice that Smoggy’s back? Me neither.
Yo Yo and Anne are going to do the naked pretzel. Perverts.
wtf is anne johnson talking about fucking?
don´t say those kind of stuff Nun……
THAT MAKES ME FEEL SICK !
feeling so sick…
fucking sick of my stomach…
HA-HA!
God,
When will Chris Martin realize that his true destiny lies with that elusive and incredibly witty Nun on the internet?
Herbman’s sick of his stomach. So … it’s a date, Yo Yo? We can play a dirty little game. How about “The Bored Tourist Lady and the Horny Howler Monkey?” I’ll speak Portuguese, of course.
what a fucking hilarious scene…
and what a lame sex it will be…
i can teach you a REAL dirty little game, but it´s no worth it Anne fucking Johnson…
Don’t offer if you’re not willing to deliver!
Don´t start something that you cannot finish…
Anne and Yo Yo doing it would be like watching two Shar Pei fight over a piece of lunch meat.
But I’d watch.
yes, it will be a lame sex.
herbert, you just keep getting better and better at this internet thing.
JOSH WITH THE DOUBLE-FACE!!!
that’s an ultra rare FACE.
said.
you have 50 years old anne johnson…
you can´t handle it anymore…
thank you cracka…
this internet thing is awesome… 2 weeks with my first pc (atlhon 800mhz)!
you know, by admitting that he would watch yoyo and johnson do the oldie scrog, josh effectively self-FACEd combined with a double-FACE to make that the internet’s first ever TRIPLE-FACE!
congratulations, josh.
(the crowd roars its approval)
how does it feel to be loved?
no, really, how does it feel? ben was asking earlier.
What can’t I handle? A cock? Do you think I’ve forgotten how? Shit, I don’t even need a refresher course.
I will accept Josh’s double-face though. Done right, that could be a fun dirty little game!
Yeah, Carka’s right. That was a triple face. Only a trained comedian would attempt, and complete, such a difficult Face.
I actually agree with Josh, even if that FACEs myself. I would sooooo totally watch Yo and Anne get it on. I’d even take pictures and post them on the internet, much to everyone’s chagrin.
“Anne and Yo Yo doing it would be like watching two Shar Pei fight over a piece of lunch meat. ”
“But I’d watch.”
I’d watch it too!
Herbman, I got my first PC in 1987. Dude, change your nappies.
Yo, we can charge admission! So much for the recession, lover boy!
HAPPY ST. PATTY’S DAY.ORG. I MUST DRINK GREEN JET FUEL NOW.
Wink, wink, nudge, nudge!
#237 is divine!
You would watch that. HA! If it happened, I would have no choice but to watch it, and it would look exactly as you described.
Herbman does wear nappies but it’s only because he engages in bizarre sex games.
(Sorry for the late reply - fuggin users kept calling all afternoon with their ‘complaints’ and ‘computer problems’.
Like I got time for that.
Hey!! Congratulations, neeegro!
Anne, you and I can make the Beast with Two Backs while Josh films it and the L Woman beats time with a drum.
i hate users!!!
Hey!! Anne and I got a second-order Divine Comment of The Day award out of that, I hope.
i would never watch this freak show…
i rather stay outside smoking my chiba…
than, i will probably see the CENSURED pictures…
GOD’S GONNA WATCH ME FUCK!!!
Whoa. A little performance anxiety here. Better consult the manual.
Darn right, cracka! I tell them to wean themselves off computers and the Internet, offer them cheap substitutions like adding machines and an Etch-A-Sketch ©, all I get is abuse.
Don’t worry, Anne, it’s like riding a bike: Just keep your bits out of the chain and sprockets and you’ll be fine.
If Zeus were here, he could give me a quick refresher course.
I can beat the drum.
As long as I can watch it.
Let’s see. Page One: “Tab A fits into Slot B.”
Okay, I can do that!
You can join in, if you wish, L Woman.
I’ll go make a sandwich.
“Tab A fits into Slot B.”
Repeat.
God always watches us fuck, Anne. That’s how He rolls.
hahaha
“consult the manual” ?
damn…
no coments about that.
said.
Guys, can you understand my Engrish?
Is it as bad as Dr. Herbman’s?
“God always watches us fuck”
Wow, now I understand Your anger, God!
Page Three: “Only for procreational purposes.”
Hey! This damn thing was the one the Mormons left here after their visit!
Yo Yo, I hope you’re right about those sprockets.
L Woman, your Engrish is perfect - are you really from Bazil?
Page Four: “Use of marijuana will dampen the sexual urge, particularly in men.”
No comments about that.
sad.
Yo Yo, no thanks.
Yes, I’m from Brazil.
#234 Anne johnson
“What can’t I handle? A cock? Do you think I’ve forgotten how? Shit, I don’t even need a refresher course.
I will accept Josh’s double-face though. Done right, that could be a fun dirty little game!”
you said you don´t need one… now you realize that isn´t so easy for an old lady hã ?
# 265
Yo Yo I rather watch it and beat the drum
you wrong again anne johnson, what a shitty manual you have….
It´s Tab A fits Slot C!
haxe sex stoned is much better old lady…
this is a new age!
OK, Anne, here’s my list: grape Jell-O (powder), 5 Jell-O shots, three tubs of K-Y Jelly, four pieces of white cotton rope, all 1.45 meters long, a Brazilian bus driver, (male), a birthday cake with “Happy Birthday XXX” written on it in light green frosting, an original copy of Les 120 Journées de Sodome by the Marquis deSade, and a package of Hubba-Bubba chewing gum.
Can you get all that on the airplane?
NO!!! Slot C is your asshole and will only incur God’s Divine Wrath. Don’t do it, Anne. Don’t succumb to the thrills of butt-lovin.
take it easy Yo Yo…
it´s anee johnson first time.
first you should check if she don´t use teeth.
said.
“Tab A fits Slot C!”
If you do that, Tab A gets shitty!
i thought you love butt-fucking Nun…
I’m disappointed!
but thanks for doing my will…
What the fuck is that Yo Yo?
I think I don’t wanna watch it anymore.
Dr. Herbman, you right, it’s a freak show.
you gotta tell her to take a dump before Yo Yo… and make a Enema.
Damn, i gotta teach everything…
Listen to Nun! No puckered pooper poppin!
Ugh, go smoke yourself, Doc!
what if tab A has been lost or damaged?
is there a customer service number in that manual?
not myself… but some parts of my hair gets me stoned!
‘freak show’??
That’s a normal Friday night, with me.
no on cares about your dickless problem cracka….
cracka, return it to the store where it was purchased, in the original package. Please retain your receipt or other proof of purchase.
“you gotta tell her to take a dump before”
holy fuck, herb.
that was pretty sick…
even by my standards.
no one cares about your dick problems cracka…
save us from this…
Shit, I’ll have nightmares tonight.
No, I won’t. Tonight I have Jeniffer Beals.
Bye.
wait a minute.
i have standards?
there can be…………
ONLY ONE———-!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
fug.
turns out i won’t need that receipt after all, yoyo!!
The Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away.
Blessed be the Name of the Lord.
Yo, I’ve got everything but the Brazilian bus driver. I had a Brazilian bus driver, but he kept putting those little squiggly things over his vowels, so I turned him loose.
Carka, I’m glad you got the quickening. It’s fuckin impossible to find return receipts and original packaging, unless you’ve got OCD.
#296 - don’t believe it, Carka! We are all deeply interested in your dick problems.
Wow! I can’t believe there’s somebody more perverted than I am. Herbman, you are freaky-deaky.
Naked movie star games… what is that from? Come on my illiterate Brazillians, I know you know this.
Anne, no bus driver?
Oh well, never mind.
I’ll have a cup of coffee and a donut instead.
i know, johnson. my dick problems have been the subject of roughly 15% of all posts in the history of this blog.
Yeah. I’ve got to catch up on my knitting.
#308 - it’s cause we care, honey.
#310 - no, i’m pretty sure it’s not.
#311 - now i’m talking to myself
As long as you don’t argue, it’s OK.
Cracka - #311 - supported.
said
.
.
.
I like illiterate Brazillian speak. God love those ignorant bastards!
And yeah, we don’t care. But it’s better ‘n Ben-talk.
nun’s asshole has camel-toe now.
nun’s vagina thanks you, herbert.
it needed a vacation.
God has not yet revealed how he feels about Brazil.
I’ll bet God loves Him some Brazil. He probably has no issues deciphering Engrish.
Cracka,
Are you even aware what the female body looks like?
sure do.
that’s why it’s worth mentioning how freakish and absurd it is that you have camel toe on both sides of your crotch.
Thanks for letting me post again God.
As He, The Most Mighty and Infallible Lord my God, made me swear:
I promise everyone here that I will not be such a drama queen fag asshole bastard cum guzzling piece of shit. I know that I suck at life and I accept your essential right to degrade me until the end of time. I humbly request that you all end all posts speaking to me with “shut the fuck up ben.” I also beg you to never ever capitalize my name ever again because i do not deserve it. I recognize that I must end all my comments with the signature “i’m a stupid piece of shit.” I accept and readily agree to this.
I am the lowest of the low and must be treated as such. Any other rules that all of you would like to apply to me you may enforce and I must submit or be banished again.
I, the one known as ben, accept this agreement, as decreed by the Lord Almighty God, in its totality.
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
320: you must always stay at #7 among God’s disciples, never moving up.
Is that so, Cracka? I think it really indicates that you have no idea what a naked female body looks like. Seriously… a camel-toed ass?! Are you a fucking moron or what? Maybe you should know more slutty gays so you really know what an overused bunghole looks like. That way you might not make such a fool out of yourself in the future, you bonehead fuckhole.
shut up, ben.
the rest of you, as always may, of course, fuck off, and so on and so forth, etc., etc. ad infinitum.
said, bitches.
(shut the fuck up ben)
shut up Ben…
really!
nun, calm down.
don’t go all ben on me or your perforated rectum may inadvertantly “blossom” all over your office chair.
now
fuck off to all and to a good night.
except for ben.
*and to all
Him damnit!
Ben, i got good new for you…
this is the FIRST time i ever agree with you.
TOTALY!!!
thank You Lord for making Ben a piece of shit.
said.
ps: i don´t know how you did not notice that before…
got good news for you*
fuck face!
O Mighty and Wondrous Lord God,
I love the new Stuff God Hates Overture! It’s a fun song and it represents our insanity nicely.
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
going to work out now bitches!
see ya later…
shut the fuck up Ben!
Dr. Herbman is Richard Simmons! LOVES IT!
http://www.richardsimmons.com
Ok.
no more bullshit, i made a search and found Yo Yo and anne freaking johnson identity.
They were busted trying to do a fucking lame sex at the park, right next to the dogs…
Yo Yo boy:
http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_N-McfiyWbdw/SL3TfeBVlSI/AAAAAAAAEPg/-ib-ZsG20Po/s200/ugly_old_man.jpg
anne freaking johnson:
[
http://media.photobucket.com/image/ugly%2Bold%2Bwoman/aguynmemphis/UglyWomanAlone.jpg
Yo yo and anne’s carnal endeavors sound like
a wet carpet getting torn out
of an abadoned duplex.
That might be true, Hume, but you’re the cockroach left behind.
Good morning folks!
Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.
Mathew 6:33
Yeah baby, I had Jeniffer Beals last night!!!!!!!
Thank you very much God!
You are so all-powerful and awesome.
Go smoke yourself, Doc!
Your jealousy is turning you greener.
I’ll always spread your word!
Thanks again!
God,
Congratulations on Your continuing smite of Africa! Pope Nazi is doing Your work.
http://www.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/africa/03/17/cameroon.pope/index.html
No Yo Yo,
the image of you and anne is getting me REAL sick and turning me greener…
No Yo Yo,
the image of you and anne is getting me REAL sick and turning me greener…
Damn L Woman, using my computer…
busted.
Hey Dr. Herbman…
When you post something your name and e-mail appears in my computer and vice versa.
So before you post something, check if my name is not there.
Sorry folks, we work in the same office and our computers are connected.
That’s how I discovered you secret identity.
Herbman is a girl? L woman is a guy? Ewwww!!
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
shut up Ben…
GO! POPE NAZI! GO! POPE NAZI! GO! POPE NAZI, GOOOOOO!
“Consistent condom use is associated with a reduction in the incidence of HIV infection of approximately 80%. It does not increase the problem. I know the Catholic church is reliant on the denial of human nature, something demonstrated regularly by the activities of its own priests, but at some point they have to recognize a simple reality: people like to have sex. You aren’t going to talk them out of it without warping their psychology in a truly pathological way (again, witness the Catholic priesthood), but you might be able to get them to practice sex in a way that protects their health.
Claiming that condoms increase the problem is disinformation and outright quackery — it’s a lie that will kill people. That is what the pope is doing on his little tour, spreading lies, doing harm, and setting back efforts to materially help the afflicted. “Friendship” won’t help the children of a woman dying slowly of AIDS, nor will gilt-robed old men whispering about “spirituality” do one scrap of good against a dangerous reality.”
-PZ
i thought you didn´t give a shit cracka!
You know, on a completely serious note, it must be horrendously painful to have a family tragedy turn into a public event for all the world to see.
On that note…
Cracka has the teeniest, tiniest penis known to man. Cockroaches have bigger cocks than poor, poor Cracka.
whore.
you’re talking about Liam Nissan and his wife now aren’t you Nun.
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
I. AM. NOT. A. WHORE!!!
Damn you, Cracka!! DAMN YOU!! 
.
.
.
.
Thanks, Cracka. I hadn’t posted my angry face for awhile.
ha ha! the Brazilians are actually just one Brazilian, and they are dumb as Ben/Neb/Pirate McCain etc etc
“Our computers are connected” perhaps that would work on a blog full of Bens and Bridgettes but not one with a bunch of IT guys.
His name is Neeson, shithead. He wasn’t named after a car.
I’m totally bummed about the Brazillians being just a Brazillian.
i believe it was rod stewart who sang these words:
have i told
you lately
shut up, ben?
have i told ya
there was noone else to
shut the fuck up?
nun’s still obsessing over celebrities.
gross.
but not as gross as her labia.
My labia is pretty and everybody loves it.
And I am not obsessing over celebrities!
I obsess over The X-Files. This sad, sad tragedy with Richardson is all over the internet and the radio news and I assume the television as well.
bullshit josh!
we r not the same person, and yes, L woman is a girl…
we work at the same company moron
I’m not an IT guy so this may come off sounding very benish but is it possible that Brazillian computers are just as illiterate as their people counterparts and they are indeed connected and our Brazillians are indeed plural??
Right Dr. Herman, you’re computers are connected and they share cookies. really? what type of bullshit set up does your company have? I would bet it’s the Imaginary 2000.
This is what happens when people find out that God hates them. Note that the rioting was done in the “Holy Land”. Coincidence? I think not.
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090318/ap_on_re_eu/eu_ireland_st_patrick_s_mayhem
Your Irish are pissed, Lord.
i don’t know why, but i believe’em yo.
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
that’s because you’re a stupid piece of shit, ben.
shut the fuck up, ben.
Dr Herb/L Woman:
We have a technical term for this ’sharing of email addresses’:
BULLSHIT.
shut the fuck up, ben.
Now that you are busted, you don’t have to use ‘Engrish’.
Ben, on your new Gravatar, is the paper bag on fire?
…I got a match…
I wonder how God feels knowing that a lot of His followers suffer from multiple personality disorder.
whatever josh…
what explain do you have ? that L woman used my pc to comment here ?
Why would L Woman use YOUR computer to send the SAME message as you?
You broke my Bullshit Meter, and owe me a new one.
im serious…
we work at the same company, in the same office and i told her about this blog…
damn, why do i have to explain everything ? only because i´m a fucking doctor ? give it a brake!!!
Nun, I bet God is preparing a Serious smiting for the Brazilian(s).
I really don’t think they’re the same person. herbman talks very differently than L. it seems unlikely but it’s possible.
but what do I know?
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
because since the first time i comment here the “name” and “e-mail” appears all the time already…
all i do i typ the comment and click on “submit Comment”…
and i “Submit Comment” and did´t check, and when the comment was already submitted i notice that was with L Woman´s name…
If He cares. We probably work God’s last Divine Nerve.
Doc, you may have to L Woman about the blog, but that’s because you share the same skull space, and her personality sees what you see.
BTW, what do you call her? Mary? Which one of you is the dominant personality? Do you have any more personalities you can show us?
just one more, but it´s only for your little mama.
auauhauha
Uh-huh, Doc. Why didn’t ’she’ just use ‘her’ own computer? Your comments were less than a minute apart - sounds fishy.
Yo,
He accidently posted as L Woman. It was Herbman making both comments. He claims that L Woman’s name was prefilled out in the fields. I’m not an IT guy so I just feel stupid like ben as I really thought they were different people.
And I can’t spell accidentally.
thank you Nun…
it was pretty much that.
well, i stopped caring about that about, um, the time i noticed it.
said.
You’d better really like The X-Files, Herbman or I’m gonna kill you!!
but we are not two personalities in one skull space.
i hope there is a new post soon. that irish guy on the front page is starting to creep me out.
i’m a stupid sack of shit.
why’s that ben?
shut the fuck up, ben.
It brings back memories of Ben’s abuser/ex-lover.
the look on his face is trippy.
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
#386 - Herbman is right, they can’t be two personalities in one space, because only one of them has any personality. The other one’s a weed that works out.
For Nun,
http://gawker.com/5173532/jon-stewart-haunts-tucker-carlsons-restless-bitter-nights
Here’s one for us, Nun!!!
http://thesisters.org/
Anne,
Checked out the site, not sure those are real “sisters” in fact anyone with swinging genitals does not qualify as a sister.
I have a very broad definition of sister. Anyone who dresses like that is a sister to me! I just like the name: Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence.
Jon Stewart is a pimp!! I love him and want to birth his pimp babies. I can’t wait for Stewart and Chris Martin to fight over me because I know they will. Eventually.
Tucker Carlson looks like a fag.
And I am soooo totally a Sister of Perpetual Indulgence.
Hey!! Something’s really wrong with some of those nuns… they have facial hair… a LOT of it.
they look like your buh-gina.
THERE CAN BE——–
ONE
ONLY ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
said
only one?
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
THAT’S IT, JOSH!!!!!!!!!!
I WILL KILL YOU AGAIN…ONCE MORE…A SECOND TIME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
DIE, JOSH, DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ha ha! I FACED both you suckers!
Cracka unknowingly gave me the allioop, while Ben lurked trying to steal what I have rightfully stolen.
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
STFU, ben
Josh deserved it. If he wasn’t a retardo chinky-chong that’s not quite capable of counting to potato, I’d rape him.
So, have we solved the Mystery of the Two Brazilians?
“I’d have gotten away with it, if it weren’t for you meddling kids!”
“Roobee Dooo!”
Chinky-chongs are smarter than the rest of us, so would a retardo chinky-chong have a regular IQ?
All we need is a boy’s locker room, and the picture is complete.
cross-eyed retardo chinky-chongs are smarter than any of us … except Josh, who is one.
# 410 - what?
I have a new chinky-chong nephew, not even six months old yet. His mom has to hold up the trigonometry textbook so he can read it.
#410 - I was thinking about the way certain males fight over quickenings. It’s like they’re comparing their penises in the shower after the football game.
No wonder Carka never showers!
I’m surprised he doesn’t just assimilate the knowledge by simply laying his chinky-chong hand on the book. Those chinky-chongs are wicked smart, except for Josh who is so retarded he can’t figure out what number comes before potato.
i remember why i dont’ think the brazilians are the same person. i showed them both how to get a gravatar at different times. L woman figured it out right away and herbman was an idiot for a long time.
sigh.
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
Ah, but these Brazilians, they’re crafty devils, Ben.
It’s because they live with monkeys.
josh double-quicken-FACEd us.
first time ever.
he’s some sort of FACE dynamo lately.
a FACE phenom.
a FACEface.
fuck you, FACEface!!
In Brazil when people get mad, they throw poop.
brazillians eat the bugs out of each other’s hair.
it’s because they live with monkeys.
herbert is hoarding rocks to throw at us later in case we taunt him.
Bitter about missing quickenings, Carka? You could buy Bridgette’s. It’s just sitting there on the last post, unloved and unwanted.
it’s okay, johnson. i’ve got a few quickenings saved up to alleviate the humiliation of my next inevitable penis smite.
hey, herb, if you see the NYPD fucking RUN!
they hate obama.
Why does the NYPD hate Obama? Does he want them to give back their bonuses?
AIG stands for arrogance, incompetence and greed y’all.
get your lighters, roll a stick and let´s get high…
yeah cracka, im glad living with monkeys, the only thing i can´t figure out is why your mamma love monkeys so much…
one last thing, tell that bitch to get her underwear in my house because im not going to wash that thing…
said.
And Ben…
may i have beeing a idiot for a short period of time but you sucker, are idiot since your fecundation…
more than that, YOUR FUCKING FATHER WAS A REAL IDIOT ALL HIS STUPID LIFE…
that´s why he raised you…
stupid son of a bitch!
one more thing, i don´t care with NYPD… they are all dirty cops, nothing that money can´t fix.
THERE CAN BE…
ONLY OOOOOOONE!!!!!
FACE CRACKA!!!!!!!!!
um.
we should just let this go, huh?
okay.
Fecundation
Fec`un*da”tion\, n. [Cf. F. f['e]condation.] (Biol.) The act by which, either in animals or plants, material prepared by the generative organs of the female organism is brought in contact with matter from the organs of the male, so that a new organism results; impregnation; fertilization.
fecundation
noun
1. creation by the physical union of male and female gametes; of sperm and ova in an animal or pollen and ovule in a plant [syn: fertilization]
2. making fertile as by applying fertilizer or manure [syn: fertilization]
No. Wait a minute. The stoner’s onto something. He was #432, and then it’s 1. Hardly a FACE, however.
i think herbert just engrishFACEd ben.
poor, stupid ben.
Doc, stop smoking those old truck tires (or monkey shit) and lie down for awhile.
so, you’re saying ben was fertilized with manure?
cracka, no one can tell WHAT Herbie was saying, he might have been trying to marry off his daughters to Ben.
i’m so sorry ben. all this time we thought it was because God hates your parents, now we see that you were abused with manure and the prolonged anoxia caused all this brain damage whereby you became such a ben.
i’ll never tell you to shut up again.
shut up, ben.
Fecundation explains Teenzilla! She’s been shitty since birth!
Ben’s paper bag is full of cowshit. Set in the porch, light it, and run. (Old joke)
yoyo, we will just assume from now on that your jokes are old.
said.
johnson,
did you remember to water her daily?
Like a fine wine, they grow better. Or is it bitter?
============================*~~~
There is a saying that I learned in the military…. There is a fine line between a$#hole and Sgt. Major. Generally the a-holes get promoted first.
who cares Yu Yu ?
Okay, I’m back.
I was out of the office to help our new boss with his temporary visa.
Now, about Dr. Herbman and I.
If you still have doubts, you should ask God.
He is omniscient and can elucidate this situation.
you care, herbert. that’s why your father is fucking of the pig mother who were made you with stupid.
L, you’re probably just bloodvork and the jew posting gibberish because your bored.
if so,
i hope you enjoy burning in hell because you’re messing with our RELIGION, man. you should respect other people’s RELIGION’s, man. because RELIGION is sacred, man.
Carka, if you think religion is sacred, why did you go see that Dawkins dude? Don’t tell me it was so you could kill him. I know you’re a closet atheist, you sinning sack of fecundity.
If you believed in fairies, for instance, you’d have a johnson worth bragging about.
why don´t you blow the head of my dick and see if it swells fuck face
Herb, we have regulations on this blog.
Touching your monkey dick is against the rules.
Stop crying like a baby Cracka.
It seems you are hurt because actually you don’t know if Dr. Herbman and I are the same person or not.
Don’t be such a pussy. Be a man!
I can’t believe I’ll have to teach you how to be a man.
Thought you are dickless you still have your balls, right?
Therefore, use them to behave like a man. That’s why gave them to you.
But if you still don’t know how to use them, don’t worry!
I’ll teach you how to be a tough guy.
Though I have a vagina, I’m a man better than you. I fuck girls all the time and you don’t know what it is anymore (dickless Cracka).
Even Nun can be a better man than you.
That’s why God gave your balls
L Woman, you started off talking nice, and had good Engrish. Now, you talk like Herb-boy.
You are the same person.
Cracka, are we gonna sit by and take this shit? I say we gang up and kill it.
Cracka, I’m trying to translate Herb-boy’s speech. I think he wants you to fvck his face.
Anne, I’ve got some overripe bananas to use as bait.
whoa, that last post from L woman convinced me they are the same person. that was way too herbman-ish.
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
STFU Ben.
said.
Come with your bananas.
We have drug dealers and kidnappers to kill you and sell your organs.
We can call the whole favela to kill you and your vulture friend.
no coments…
Don’t be idiot.
Just ask God
supported L woman!
Of course I’m speaking Engrish.
My monkey is tired.
God, could you just tell them the truth, please?
And could you tell Crack that I fuck more girls than he ever did in his dreams, please?
Hah - I asked God to call down the rains onto your favela. Soon a landslide will bury it.
ummmm….
uhhh…..
huh?
are you attempting to confuse me?!!!
it won’t work!!! because when i don’t understand something i just respond with machismo and anger and violence!!! we could bomb your country off the face of the earth and still have 987,214,543 bombs left for new zealand!!!!
L Woman-
it’s not a contest. i’m afraid your penis envy has distorted your view of sexual conquest. quality, not quantity. don’t gorge yourself on cheap wine and processed cheese before the caviar and good booze are served.
re: L Woman and Dr Herbman,
the question is which one of them is real and which is fake. I feel like I’m living the movie Primal Fear, except this time I don’t really give a fuck.
But did one of them really kill the bishop?
no, but one of them claims to have banged Salma Hayek, and again I just can’t believe it.
right, josh. this is just like primal fear—minus the acting and character development and riveting storyline. i keep waiting for…………….well, for 5 o’clock so i can go home.
I have declared this comment as divine.
They are different monkeys.
They won’t believe You, God. They still don’t believe Bridgette is real. Some of Your followers are really, really bad, God.
it boggles the mind.
both that a cracka as mortal as myself could have a divine comment and that herb and L could be different monkeys.
mind: boggled.
shut up, ben.
the rest of you————-fuck off.
All those who lack faith shall be punished accordingly!
You go, God with Your mad, angry self!!
Guess God already punished Anne
with a flappy vagina that looks like
wrinkled rat hole.
The Brazilians have been punished
with rampant AIDS and an unyielding libido.
God punished Ben with life as Ben.
God punished Mr. Batzrubble with a flock of sexy, syphillis-ridden sheep.
God punished me with charm, guile
and gonads the size of grapefruit.
I do not complain, Sir.
I sing only Your praises.
Elephantitis balls are nothing to brag about, Hume.
God punished me with hideous deformities and the evil Irish syphillis. I really appreciate all that, I really do.
God has never punished me once.
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
He punished your family, classmates, neighbors and strangers with your existence.
Your punishment?
Being you.
Miss N. Bizness, my balls are exquisite.
Gleaming, even.
God punished me by surrounding me with incompetent computerphobes.
Latest issue: “My computer won’t turn on.” After walking them through the easy steps (Power one, plugged in, etc), I visited them. Their monitor was turned off! I showed them the On/Off button on the monitor. “Sorry, I’m not good with computers.”
WTF? It’s an On/Off button, the same ones that’s on their television.
I want a good review this quarter, so I smiled and said it could happen to anyone.
We’re coming up on the 500 quickening, where is cracka?
he’s waiting in the shadows ready to pull a Josh
G’Day, Josh. Cracka’s in the next time zone, so he might not be at work yet. Looks like you got a fair shot at the quickening.
maybe, But Ben is always in the background, like that piece of dog shit you don’t see and step on.
I thought Cracka was on the east cost as he rolls out at 5 to drink. or is that his lunch time?
He’s in Minnestoder, the land that time forgot.
ahhh it’s all coming together. He works in the medical profession, so he’s doing the 7 to 3 shift in a hospital.
THERE
CAN
Hope you got your static guard on Ben.
God Might Smite.
Or give the quickening to Josh or me.
ha ha! GOd wanted you to have that one Yo, a network cable just went bad at the moment I needed to post.
ben is no longer allowed to get quickenings!
Thank You, most powerful God!
I shall only use this quickening for good!
The story of St. Patrick is that of a missionary who made a difference. He brought Christianity and hope to a new land. He is an inspiration for Christians everywhere, not just for Irish people.
Here’s an account of his experience in his own words:
“I saw a man coming, as it were from Ireland. His name was Victoricus, and he carried many letters, and he gave me one of them. I read the heading: “The Voice of the Irish”. As I began the letter, I imagined in that moment that I heard the voice of those very people who were near the wood of Foclut, which is beside the western sea—and they cried out, as with one voice: “We appeal to you, holy servant boy, to come and walk among us.” - St. Patrick
ROBERT MURPHY-
fuck you. no, seriously, fuck you.
i work all sorts of stupid hours at this stupid place. it’s stupid.
“come and walk among us that we may rape your anus and deny responsibility later…for our rape is a holy rape.”
I’m so ashamed, Robert Murphy is one of my people. No wonder God hates us all.
HAHA!! God FACEd ben. Good one, God!!
We’re not tapping the maple trees this year, so I have extra time to spend with my boys when I get home.
The oldest is experimenting with Mentos and diet Coke, one of his friends is making a video for Youtube. The youngest is trying to build his own bow and arrows.
No cats were harmed in the execution of these projects.
just be thankful he’s not experimenting with cocaine and anal…and youtube…the other one could be building his own gravity bong and steamroller…
all in good time.
What the fuck is wrong with experimenting with cocaine, anal and youtube? You are far too judgmental, Cracka!
nothing. it’s perfectly normal. this, on the other hand, is fucked up:
http://www.duluthnewstribune.com/event/article/id/115253/
AAAAAAAH….the iron range. there is a town in northern minnesota called “duluth”. it is the last outpost of civilization between here and montreal. beyond duluth is a series of small mining towns known as “the iron range”. nothing stranger than a ranger.
A steamroller’s OK.
I draw the line at a Cleveland Steamer.
Skunk Prank Goes Awry sounds like an Iron Ranger’s punk band.
The iron range is full of rapists. I want to go there.
you’d do well there, nun.
skunk prank.
right after scarecrow doll-vomit gets done recording
i will assemble the worst musicians i can find to record
skunk prank. thanks, yoyo. you’re a genius.
I’d do well anywhere there’s men with penises, Cracka. I’m a slut.
Yo,
Do you know what a steamroller is? Hint… it’s not a piece of machinery meant to level land.
Do all red heads come from Ireland?
shut up, bei.
go to your corner and count to potato.
I love me some Richard Dreyfuss. Cracka will try to assert that I have an obsession with celebrities but he’s wrong. I have an obsession with The X-Files and I really, really, really dislike Dick Cheney.
I guess I should have posted the link… sorry, I was distracted by visions of penises running through my head.
http://www.politico.com/news/stories/0309/20205.html
holy shit Bei. even i think you suck.
and i’m a stupid piece of shit.
I don’t think ben should be allowed to talk that way to Bei. Bei has never once ran away screaming and crying and he thinks we’re all blasphemous. ben is a baby and a piece of doo-doo who should know his place.
Yeah, some kind of bong. The boys grow their own weed, but 4-H got pissy when they tried to enter it in an exhibition.
If they could build bongs and steamrollers to sell, they could have a vertical monopoly.
yes ma’am.
imastupidpieceofshit.
My steamrollers have never been bongs. Bongs are water-pipes.
http://www.indian-handicrafts-exporters.com/pcat-gifs/products-small/stream-rollers-srg-702.jpg
True - I misspoke. A weedpipe.
“tobacco” water-pipes on sale here
Mmm… precious, precious glass steamroller. The plastic ones suck butt.
that’s a crack pipe!!!! aint no room for a filter on that glass pipe cracky!
That’s right - Josh knows about crack. (Insert racist comment here)
yo yo,
crack is wack!
Lunch was a tuna sandwich, no fondue.
If Josh were black he’d also know about weed. My racist comment is Josh is a defective black. If he were black, that is.
but since he’s a retarded potato counting slope-dink
your comment does not apply.
i know about crack:
it’s delicious.
never smoke it.
josh, you can smoke weed out of that thing
trust me
i haven’t always been a drunken honky
i’ve been sober for a week.
liver started getting pissed off, wicked hangovers, need exercise so i don’t end up like bridgette.
here’s what i re-learned about sobriety:
it sucks.
but, alas, i must run and lift weights and eat healthy food for a while. i wish God would show us the way to stay as hot as He is without working out. How do You do it, Sir?
God is Divinely Sexy. When I cry out “oh God” during fuck sessions, it’s not because I’m impressed with my partner. I’m thinking about God and His Studly Body and Divine Cock.
I’ve smoked crack before, I had a bad trip and Gumby scared the living hell out of me. I will never smoke crack again. I prefer crystal meth in a bottled sparkling water or acid or shrooms but sadly, my loser-boy fucked up my ability to do hard drugs and I haven’t done anything hard in ages.
And to concur with Cracka, yes, you can smoke the sweet chiba out of a steamroller. I’ve done it on countless occasions.
I’m back.
I fired my old monkey and bought a new one.
I had an idea how to show everybody that Dr. Herman and I are not the same person.
I’m back.
I fired my stupid old monkey and I bought a new one.
My monkey gave me an idea to show everybodu that Dr. Herbman and I are not the same person.
Today I’m not in the office.
Can you see the different IP God?
Tomorrow I’ll take my camera to the office.
I’ll show what happens to my computer and Dr. Herman’s computer when we post something.
God,
Why you just don’t tell them the truth?
God might be busy with His Divine Duties. You should give Him time to reply.
I feel like slapping someone. Ben?
definitely slap ben. how do you e-slap somebody? L, God already stood up for you. it’s over. we’ve moved on.
now we’re concerned with who’s done what kinds of drugs. i personally subcribe to dennis leary’s theory of rehab. when a junkie says there gonna sober up for a while, what they mean is they’re just gonna drink and smoke weed. i’ve been in rehab for years now.
said.
*they’re
*their
*there
i know, i pulled a ben.
I was confused, crack. All this time I thought you worked in rehab.
I learned long ago that the best way to get drugs is to have a lengthy, painful anxiety attack. Then the doctor writes a little note, and you get a bottle of generic for a reasonable fee. It’s your choice whether you want to get stoned three times a month and be anxious the rest of the time, or not so anxious all the time.
Today I asked the Culinary Arts students if they would please make some fondue???
I bet they could boil some vegetables into mush for you.
Speaking of nauseating food, they’re having a Scrapple Festival in Philly this weekend!!
Any of you pukes like scrapple? I’m buying the first round!
reporting to be slapped sir! oooh! I can hardly wait!
i’m a stupid piece of shit.
My Culinary Arts students don’t boil anything to mush! The vegetables are always served crisp steamed. Now, about that scrapple…
Scrapple is an evil corporation.
I don’t like prescription drugs. I prefer my recreational highways to the magic land where all is good.
555 — a Great Beast who didn’t make it past Simon and Paula.
Err… Snapple is an evil corporation.
Scrapple is just gross and chiba affects my reading comprehension. Sorry about that.
ben, I grow weary of your ’stupid piece of shit’ signature. I now command you to come up with a different way for you to insult yourself every time you dare post.
Scrapple is as close as Caucasians get to being frugal. I love the stuff. I’ll probably make a special trip into Philly just for free scrapple!
johnson,
no matter how poor i get, i just can’t buy cheap stuff. it’s against my cracker nature. i don’t care what the economy says, i’m buying top of the line everything!!
Dear God,
Personally I don’t think ben is capable of coming up with a different self-insult for every post. This is just a humble suggestion, because I wouldn’t presume, but perhaps you should take time every day to provide him with one that he has to use all day. You could rotate them.
Monday: dumb fuck
Tuesday: hissy face
Wednesday: dickhead
Thursday: stupid piece of shit (as it’s nice to recycle)
Friday: bug fucker
Saturday: Irish
Sunday: (day of rest) no ben posts allowed
How about this for ben…
monkeys should rip me apart and then eat the mush i call a brain
.
.
I’m assuming he can’t capitalize “I” if he’s talking about himself but God will correct me if I’m wrong. Which I probably am.
ANNE!!
Don’t you dare call ben “Irish”!! We may be hideously deformed and riddled with the evil Irish syphillis but we are NOT bens!!
And I don’t think God should coddle ben and supply him with insults.
…after eating the brain, shit it out and piss on it.
Sorry, Nun. I recall that the puke in question had red hair. So I probably unfairly stereotyped him as Irish. Yes. That was an injustice to the Irish.
i just googled scrapple. we don’t have that here.
no thanks, i’ll stick with food i can’t afford like filet mignon, sushi, foie gras, etc.
ben should use these insults:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9V7zbWNznbs&feature=PlayList&p=52C7B8620EDCB464&playnext=1&playnext_from=PL&index=1
yoyo-565
i’m proud of you, you’re finally revolting enough for the rest of us.
congratulations.
Yes, fortunately for all of you, scrapple is a Pennsylvania thing. Basically it’s what Curtis’s cafeteria ladies do with all the leftover food at the end of the week. They mix it together, add cornmeal and glue, shape it into rectangles, and fry it in lard.
HUNGER PANGS! HUNGER PANGS! MUST HAVE SCRAPPLE!
Yo, that was incredibly, suitably revolting!
I’m so impressed with Yo Yo, or as Herbman calls him, Yu Yu.
So, scrapple is a lot like Spam, yeah?
Why thanks, guys! It’s an honor and a tribute to receive this recognition!
my wife told me i need to stop being so vulgar and offensive at home or she’ll have to take away my divine blogging priveleges. i would rather die than stop saying fag in my own home. told that bitch.
She probably wishes you would die too, Cracka.
wait, Nun you have a strawberry patch?
Cracka,
If you really told her, she’d have a black eye, and if you truly made your point you would have choked her out and then tried to push her out your lamborghini. anything less than that and you’re really the bitch.
I am not a redhead, Josh. I’m a blond Irish.
Josh, you must know what scrapple is. Doesn’t it cross the state lines between PA and NY sometimes?
Of course Josh doesn’t eat scrapple. We have ruled out “redneck” as part of his identity.
I know what scrapple is, but I would never eat it. Scrapple is also called “pork mush”, I don’t eat pork and I don’t eat “mush”
My mom eats shit like that sometimes, that’s what her health is so bad. Fucking southerners will eat a pigs penis if you pickle it right.
http://www.globalgourmet.com/food/sleuth/0998/scrapple.html
That’s it! Scrapple is pig penis and corn meal, fried in lard! Gonna have me some of that!
But first I better go exercise. Have a nice evening, Carka, Josh, Nun, Yo Yo, and our little hissy spittie.
581 - My mom was PA Dutch, which didn’t keep her from being white trash. God must love white trash. He hasn’t hated them yet.
Speaking of which, dammit! I’ve missed Dr. Phil again!
no Anne, the only doctor allowed here is me…
i have God´s license!
so if Dr. Jay were to try to post here, he would not be allowed? I don’t want to live in a world without Dr. Jay, or for that matter Dr. Doom or Doc Oc, or Dr. SuckmydickDrherbman.
what a fag…
ha ha! Herbman I know how you guys do in Brazil. TO quote my male Brazilian coworker, “in america I have boyfriend, in Brazil I have girlfriend, it’s Brazilian thing”
So… does that mean that you really are asking him to suck your dick, Josh? I didn’t know you swung your bat that way.
Brazilians do know a thing or two about beav waxes
though.
Anne’s Black Forest of Flappy Labia is impressive
nonetheless.
Trust me. I lost my car keys in her bush, for fuck’s sake.
Also, my innocence, and a dog-eared copy
of The Old Man and The Sea.
Nun,
I meant that in a metaphorical sense. I love my gays friends, coworkers, and relatives but personally I live by the old Biggie adage “family and business don’t mix; like 2 dicks with no bitch, wind up in some serious shit”
So… who’s going to get the 600 Club quickening?
well yo yo, it’s just me and you here
Nun is still sleep (most likely with a black dude)
Cracka is hung over
Anne is making love to a dandelion patch
The brazilians are busy planning their kidnapping and random of Ben (Boy will they be surprised when his mom will not pony up the $15.34 they are going to ask for)
ransom not random!!!! Him damn it!
THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Huzzah! Use it well!
Err, are you able to use the quickening? Sometimes it takes awhile after having a baby.
ha! maybe for you Yo Yo.
i’m 29 and i still wet my bed.
shut up ben shutupben STFUben.
shut, Shut, SHUT, SHUT up Ben!
I just realized something. Ben is not locked in here with us, we are locked in here with Ben.
whoa! looks like i pressed yo yo’s button.
i smell like rotten fish penis.
how did you know i’m hungover?
I played the odds Cracka. Like I did with Anne, she might not be making love to a dandelion patch, it could be a maplewood tree.
it’s Fridaaaaaaayyy!!
i spend my weekends crying on the toilet.
Cracka, as Josh says, it’s a sure bet.
Ben, keep your slimey hands off my button.
who raped you this time Ben ?
Don´t cry, you are familiar with this…
Josh, you are a real fag…
there is no better word to describe you.
FAG!
Look who is back! It’s Dr. L Herbwoman!
said.
hahaha… still on this Yu Yu ?
i am trying no more to convince you that me and L woman are two different people, but if yuo don´t believe yet, fuck you.
‘fuck you.’??
Sorry Herbwoman, I don’t butter my bread on that side.
that´s what you are saying…
…I mean, I’ve had offers…
But God said No Anal.
Once President Taft touched Yo Yo’s knee, but Yo Yo explained to Taft that he was far to old to be a president’s mistress.
Hey Josh, we wouldn’t kidnap ben, we wouldn’t get any money from that.
I wouldn’t kidnap Cracka as well cos I think his wife wants him dead.
Then, I think I would kidnap Nun. You know, she has a lot of lovers. I guess they would pay a lot of money to have her back.
L Woman,
You really don’t know Nun’s lovers then.
“TAFT!?” I wouldn’t let that obese buggerer of Congresional pages near me. Roosevelt, on the other hand…well, he wasn’t a Rough Rider because of horsemanship.
619-
OLD-FACE!
621-
CHEAP-WHORE-FACE!
Then I should kidnap you Josh.
They gay community would pay to have you back.
They love you, we all know it.
Aaaahhh…
Dr. Herbman’s family is rich.
I almost forgot it.
No, I can’t kidnap him.
Otherwise, who would be my partner?
supported L woman…
and don´t talk about my family, let them live…
and i would never pay shit to have Nun back, if it´s not for free i don´t want it…
God, thank You for my family wealth… =)
Bridgette and her family in the news:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/5004431/Family-who-are-too-fat-to-work-say-22000-worth-of-benefits-is-not-enough.html
Fuck, I can’t access your link Josh.
HEY!!! You might be surprised how much my lovers would pay to get me back, Josh. I have some kind of super-hero vagina and guys just can’t get enough. But you do have a point, they would be more willing to pay a ransom if a bag of weed was added to the deal… it’s because they’re black.
Nun,
if you’re lovers were not poor black dudes on unemployment and “disability” then maybe they would pay. They spend what little money they have on bail and grape soda.
You’re not missing much, L. Just a family of chubbasauruses who want more, more, more. Fucking fatties.
nun, it’s not your vagina. it’s just something they have with white girls. josh could explain it if he wasn’t so retarded.
HA!! Grape soda is for pussies like yourself, my fine young chinky-chong. They spend what little money they have on 40s of Olde E. To pay the ransom for my luscious vajayjay, they will rob and steal from whitey.
Those fatties were disgusting. Put them work in a freak show.
mmm….grape drink.
That would be true if I was fat, Cracka. Black men love them some chubby white females. However, I am not a walking landmass so I know it’s my super-hero vagina. My vagina is so strong that I could snap your dick right off your body if you had one.
cracka is right. If Only I could find the clip from Chris Rock’s kill the messenger where he says even Rosie Odonnell could get black dick, and she dont even want dick.
Nun,
I live in “da hood” or well it used to be before gentrification. But what remains are the corner stores stocked full of Welches Grape Soda and Sunkist. And dont forget quarter waters. Nothing helps keep the modern negro down like diabetes and colitis.
you can’t stage a revolution if you have to take your insulin and you’re shitting your pants.
Huh - guess I’m out of the loop. I thought black men only drank Colt 45.
yo yo,
you’re in the loop, except the loop you’re in is 40 years old!
Colt 45! You mean with Billy Dee Williams as the spokes person! Come on man!
Nun,
Ole E is very West Cost. On the East hod negroes drink Cobra out the can which is in a brown paper bag.
“you can’t stage a revolution if you have to take your insulin and you’re shitting your pants.”
I spat my iced tea onto my keyboard when I read that!
I was thinking the sodas might be east coast hood too, Josh. Honestly, if it ain’t a 40 or a 22 of something or Mad-Dog or Orange Jubilee, the homies ain’t drinkin’ it. They do seem to love them some Pepsi though. Go figure.
josh is rolling today.
he old-faced yoyo twice already.
i was trying to find a youtube clip from buffalo ‘66 where the guy is telling his friend why nobody likes.
it’s because you’re dumb. and because you’re a retard. nobody likes you because you’re a dumb retard.
it’s so ben.
When I was younger, we didn’t have all these ‘brands’ and ‘types’ of beer. Filtering? Cold-Brewed®? Meh. I bought what was cheapest.
Last time I was out West, I bought a soda at a small store. The clerk asked me if I wanted my ‘pop’ in a ’sack’. I caused a fight when I said “No, I want your Mom in bed.”
Well, I can only speak for myself but I’m super fond of Josh.
I love all you guys, with a few exceptions.
Gotta go, my boss just woke up from his nap.
Who the fuck was Mysterion??
Nun, want to visit Maine? Come up for the Hempfest! http://www.mainevocals.net/
Dunno what they offer for chiba.
Tommy Lindal?
Is he black and does he have a big penis??
looks like yoyo’s trying to get some.
Get some what?
And Tommy Lindal was in a Norwegianf band, he’s probably whiter than me.
I’m only interested in black guys with ginormous penises, Yo. And weed.
it´s not only black cocks you like Nun, am i so away that you forgot about me ?
my dick is bigger than black folks and im pretty whity…
what about our dirty sex games ?
Sorry Nun, the Maine Vocals Hempfest will have one but not the other.
i got (all of this x 10) Nun…
but im whity!
and weed ? im not even talking about
my stash put your stuff to shaaame!
Nah… you ain’t white. You’ve got a beautiful tint to your skin that makes you non-white.
Also, Herbman… don’t knock the shit they can get in the Pacific NW, you might be surprised.
but that’s the thing, Dr. Herb wants to be considered white. That’s the curse of all the latin people. They try so hard, but to the white world they will always be a bunch of dirty spicks.
fucking ethnic monkeys.
THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE ANTICHRIST!!!!!!!!!!!!
You can try, Cracka but I’m the antichrist. It’s my birthright.
better than be a fucking broke black man…
just one more criminal in the world…
and Nun, im pretty shure stuff in Pacific NW must be from another world…
much better than here… maybe someday you can share some with me ?
Herby, but you must realize the only difference between a wannabe white Latino and a broke black man is in your head. TO everyone else they’re both minorities that should not be dating white women.
Darned right. Just ask cracka.
just ask my uncle
well josh, you must realize something too:
God, made me White, pretty, with big dick and a ganja connoisseur…
and made you, a ugly bastard unployed black man…
that´s the fucking difference!
Josh, is your uncle a racist cracka?
yo yo,
he is.
herbman,
total burn! you showed me who’s boss by basically issuing a statement that reiterates what i just said. It’s a privilege to be white? In the immortal words of Chris Rock, “nigga please”
BTW - I’m neither ugly nor unemployed, or 100% black either.
Also I never ever thought I’d run into someone on the internet who was a worse speller than me.
Family reunions must suck. Do you keep in touch with him? What’s he think of your wife and child?
kill the messenger… what a freat show, crhis rock rocks!
and josh, there is a first time for everything in life, but no anal sex ok ?
yo yo,
my uncle is the least of my racist worries. my racial background and my wife’s make for fun for all. Don’t even get me started on the huge religious differences between our families, or that her dad is one of those minorities who tries so hard to curry favor with white people that he calls black people niggers, but fails to realize that as soon as he leaves they’re calling him all sorts of names. I can’t complain as all this gives me a lot of jokes.
what women want ?
EVERY FUICKING THING…
shut up nigga…
nobody cares about your family issues…
herbman,
I got to see it live at both the Apollo and at Madison Square Garden. The Rock rocks, too bad for Nun he is a tiny black dude like 5′6″ 150 lbs.
Herbman,
Learn Engrish fool. I answered a question, one posed because Yo Yo actually cares or is just noisy. either way he asked.
now about your family issues….. fuck off.
and i don´t care about my spelling issues either!!!!!!
and i don´t care about my spelling issues either!!
auhauha
don´t be mad josh, people just don´t care you know ?
and, i know english you damn fool, but im from brazil and speak portuguese, talking is easier than writing, but im getting better… i can talk much better than write…
your wife told me that…
my wife told you that! Ouch! 6th grade burn!!!!!!! YOu should become a professional insult comic. work on your english and believe in your dream.
Like I told your mom, “If you believe it you can achieve it, so keep believing my penis goes directly from your ass to your mouth.”
Josh, I care. I really, do, man.
Let’s fly down to Rio, hire some Army guards who are on the take, let them beat Dr. HerbWoman, steal his wallet, then spend his money on some hawt Brazillian models.
See, God. Yo Yo doesn’t believe You about them being two different monkeys. Bad followers, bad.
how many models can we get with an empty wallet?
Damn - that’s true, Josh. OK, I’ll bounce a check at Shop ‘N Save, that gets us to Rio. Once we’re there, we can probably get some models by pretending to be American film directors or something.
is true, my wallet is empty just like my pants. I been telling fib, me penis is very small just like cracka.
I never smoke chiba before either, my mom will not let me. Me no real doctor, I just got present at christmas, a game called operation, I like game so I call myself doctor. me gay.
Good idea yo yo. I have a camera that looks professional. All we need is a woman to work with us. Based on my exploits surfing internet porn, it’s always easier to get the ladies to loosen up if you have a lady with you.
Ben?
Err, not Ben related to Josh’s comment # 693, but comment # 692!
Josh’s comment # 693 - Perhaps Nun would come with us.
I fear Nun would steal our Brazilian ladies for herself, or be too distracted by the darker skinned Brazilian me as to be any use to us.
Then maybe Anne? She can drop off Teenzilla at a Rio sweatshop.
So did anyone see Watchmen?
Personally I think HArvey Firestein is the coon.
THE CAN BE ONLY ONE!!!!
I think Anne would be too distracted by the Brazilian witch doctors to be of any use. Maybe Bridgette. She would annoy the women away from her and directly over to us.
Yeah, but who wants to sit next to Bridgette for the flight?
Plus, the airlines charge by the pound - no way could we pay!
So like I think we ought to, like, fuck with Herbman by talking all teenager and shit. Soooooo, wanna go shopping? Like, I just got my allowance, too cool!
Uhhh… Nun does NOT play naked movie star games with women! You’re right that I would probably be distracted by some of the darker-skinned Injun Brazillians though.
Okay, so, yeah. I’ll go with you dudes to Rio. Like, do they have a beach and stuff there? Are there hot guys?
One thing you’d never see me do in Brazil is go out and preach Jesus to the remaining Native Brazillians. Fuck that shit. Their gods are probably a lot better than ours.
yo yo,
I thought we would just crate Bridgette.
I want to go to Brazil! I think it’s pretty fucked up that I got kicked to the side because Josh thinks I’m going to munch carpet.
Speaking of Teenzilla, I finally found a buyer. She’s making sneakers in Cambodia. And I’m keeping all her stuff!
2 kewl Anee!! LOLZ 4NR IZ CONFUZD!!
Pound for pound, Nun and I could both go in the crate you were planning to use for Bridgette. And we could bring three suitcases of sex toys, and still be underweight.
IDK 4NR LOL!
Nun, you could use Anne’s pendulous
bosoms as a pillow.
Hume, you could use your hollow head as a fruit bowl.
Nun and I don’t swing that way, bosom pun intended.
In fact, we have determined that I like my men older, and she likes hers younger.
Sound encouraging, Yo Yo?
The noxious fumes from her pagan-gina
might get to you, though.
Hume Cronyn: scrapple amidst the filet mignons of life.
Sounds like a plan, Anne!
I like the crate idea, too. Josh, do you have a video camera?
Or, like Han Solo saving Luke Skywalker
in The Empire Strikes Back,
you could hide inside her cavernous womb
for warmth and security.
my brother told me you can buy a bottle on the street for $1 and get piss drunk off it…
in brazil, i mean. some city he was in. rocking out with his far superior musician skills.
Most of the people here are freak evangelist just like Bridgette. They suck!!!
And when you visit an indian tribe thinking you’ll find something different, guess what???
They are also becoming freak evangelist.
Nothing against the evangelists, but against freak evangelists.
“And I thought those things smelled bad on the outside.”
good job, hume.
i was growing tired of thinking of ways to insult nun’s vagina. i can’t believe i missed that one.
Nice.
720+723
tag-team-star-wars-themed-vaginaFACE!!!
Cracka, my omnkey didn’t understand what you said about the bottle. Could you explain it better?
bottle of cachaça. Get drunk, pass out.
my brother was in your country
buying bottles of wine for $1 from some street vendors.
i don’t remember which city he was in.
also:
pfoaskdjfioqwehfio fnvjknm,nxvl;dkafjuioweiofj,nvm,fnkldjfkl
Crcaka, it was fermented monkey urine.
Bottles of wine???
Maybe cachaça.
Small bottle but you just have to drink half of it and you are tottaly drunk.
Cracka takes his drink straight, no caipirinha.
So the girls want to come to Brazil???
If they lake the darkies, they should go to Bahia.
If they want to see forest, they should go to the Amazon.
But never to Rio. Just if you want to be kidnapped and killed.
I meant like the darkies
Poor Cracka is an idiot. I believe Hume was talking about Anne’s vagina. She’s the pagan, not I. Idiot.
Cracka, Hume was insulting my vagina! He is so dazzled by my love button that it’s all he can talk about.
wow, nun’s brand of meanness just isn’t that funny.
any vagina joke is a good vagina joke, nun.
713: LOL! 4NR! UR GR8, Yo!
that must be what he was talking about, doctor Lerb-wo-man.
—shut up, ben.
tnx anne, LOLZ
Calling you an idiot isn’t a joke, Cracka.
Cracka - you’re a bad follower
I talked to Dr. Herbman, I said I wanted to make a video to show how our computers work after we post something.
But he didn’t accept. It’s up to him now to show you we are 2 different people
Maybe if you ask nicely.
I wouldn’t bother, L. Even if you did give proof positive that you’re different monkeys, they wouldn’t believe you. They don’t even believe God.
what is funny to me is L and Herbman are never in the same place at the same time; very Klark and Kal-El
Yeah, you’re right!
Klark and Kal-El
Though we work in the same office, I work as secretary, so I spend more time here.
Dr. Herbman, has to walk a lot here.
We work in a factory.
But I would watch the video.
I saw you and Dr.Herb talking about his color.
I consider him white.
I’m the one who got a tan here.
What kind of factory do you work in, Lerbwoman?
No, really?
I just thought you two worked
in Brazil’s version of the Jet Propulsion Lab.
I have Portuguese and indian routs.
About Dr.Herb… I guess he has european roots and for sure no black and no indian roots
Motorcycles
He’s a doctor in a factory?
“looks like his leg is broken. What should we do doc?”
“Order another one from Sears.”
Yeah Anne, it would be funny to make the video.
Now it’s up to him.
Also, Anne, your vagina is dazzling,
just like when the Dallas Cowboys
new stadium roof retracts during
nice weather.
He’s not a real doctor, retard.
L woman,
No matter where Herbman is from, no matter how white he thinks he is, he’s still just a macaquito. NO matter how much he tries to shit on me for being a crioulo. TO the people from Spain, the real Spanish, Herbman is just another Macaco who can play soccer!
his mom told me so.
There are doctors working in the factory Josh.
Some factories here has more than 9 thousand staffs.
Our factory has about 4 thousand.
Nun,
he’s not a real anything. that’s my point.
you of all people should have got that. I guess you’re just a dumb blonde with big tits (that I would like to see)
9 thousand staffs! Is Gandoff’s there?
I don’t know how “Hume” can type so well with one hand down his pants.
Yeah Josh, about the macaquito… whatever, it’s between you guys.
No, Josh, their factory has 4,000 staffs. All ramrod straight.
Sorry Josh.
Stuff
Josh, Herb is not a macaquito.
He’s a caipira.
employees
Maybe “Hume” can go to Lerbman’s factory and get a staff.
They make dildos?
I think I’ll have to kill this monkey too
Dammit, I’m impressed with these Brazillians! How many of us would be willing to look in a dictionary to find the right words to write on this thread? All some.
I mean 4 thousand employees
L Woman, your Engrish is much better than my Portogeek.
Hume needs a dildo. It’s tough going through life with a mangina.
Good one.
Typing with one hand just takes practice, Anne,
like peeling back your labia to reach
your door knocker of a clit.
Anne - could you give a breake to my monkey, please?
English is the universal language. All other languages are retarded. If you can’t speak English, you deserve to make 14 cents an hour making sneakers for people who can speak English.
I don’t brake for monkeys. If he was a parrot it would be better.
just busting balls L woman.
To be honest, no one on this blog really cares about each other. It’s just a place where people of a certain intelligence and Ben get together to bust each other’s balls. No one really cares if you and Herbman are the same person. No one cares if he is “white” (although the skin tone argument that is prevalent in every community of color is hilarious to me. The lighter you are the better off you are, unless you count the whole skin cancer thing).
So did anyone see Watchmen? Let’s talk about it.
Brazillians are supposed to be pretty accepting people. Leave it to the honky and non-honky Americans to give them grief.
Josh,
I don’t go up against God(unless it’s my naked body and His Naked Body but that only happens in my dreams so it’s irrelevant) so I believe Him when He says they’re two different monkeys.
“Hume,” if you want to peel back my labia, go get in bed, pull up the covers, and go to sleep, because only in your fuckin dreams will you ever get that close to me. Go fondle a … oh, I don’t know, let me just pick a random animal … SHEEP.
Anne - post #778: Were you channeling cracka??
Ok old vulture lady.
Whatever
I except God’s word they are two different people. I do no defy Him.
Hypothetically, I’m saying that if God were a mere mortal, one who had trouble with his own website, and he were to rely on IP addresses to determine if L woman and Herbman are two different people, then anyone with a little bit of understanding could change their IP address or post as Herbman during the day at work, then post as L woman at home thereby having 2 distinct IP addresses. With the internet anything is possible.
haven’t seen it, josh.
and i sort of care. i mean there is only a certain amount of caring that is appropriate for people you insult on a daily basis but have never met, you know? except for ben, in his case the appropriate amount is none at all.
1. I believe they are two different monkeys. Because God said so.
2. They have chosen a good place to practice Engrish, except we bust balls here, so they’ve got 2 B ready 4 dat.
3. In Brazil Injun languages, the word “good food” is synonymous with “parrot.” Said. Two different people from Brazil have me told this.
Josh, haven’t seen Watchman, is it worth it? How does it compare?
Brazillians pretty accepting people?
I don’t believe it that much.
That’s what they say but no what they do.
If things keep going the way they’re going then all my pets will become livestock so I can understand why Brazillians think parrots are “good food”.
damn L woman said that Anne is this guy’s husband!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vulture_(comics)
watchmen, i mean, haven’t seen it.
man, i’m falling behind on all these retarded posts.
AND I LOVE BEING A VULTURE LADY! Is by accident you call me this, L Woman, or did you see my blog?
I didn’t hear that from a Brazillian, L. I tend not to listen to Brazillians when they speak because they don’t speak English goodly and are therefore lower than the soles of my shoes.
Anne, if I wanted to go anywhere near your
naked body, I would first have to consume
several gallons of vodka and a plateful of
horse tranquilizers.
Next would be the arduous task of getting into
that pesky Haz-Mat suit…
Then I would make sure my flamethrower was fueled up
to kill all the critters that would try to escape that
darkened cave between your legs from which
your demon offspring was birthed.
More I think about it, I’d probably pull a Tora Bora
and just lob grenades at your opening, hoping
to seal it off forever.
excellent work, hume.
i hope you’re white.
we need all the crackers we can get around here.
now, to get down to bizness…
there can be——————-
Watchmen: if you read the book and liked it you will like the movie. It’s almost 3 hours and it flew by. They changed a few things, but I’d rather not say so you will be surprised. They cut some things, but the editing and the way it was filmed made a very face paced movie.
The guy playing Rorschach was amazing. Overall it’s worth it to see it on the big screen. The fight scenes where very well done. The only weak link in the chain is the girl. Compared to what the other actors did, she is horrible but fun to look at (considering she’s naked in the movie).
Sorry Nun, no blacks in this movie.
ONLY ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
As white as we get, and thanks.
Said.
fuck.
HA HA!!!!!!!! That was by accident. but a quickening nonetheless.
I’ll bet Josh has a deliciously huge penis.
My oldest daughter, who is always perfect and wonderful, went 2 C Watchmen. She doesn’t usually like that kind of stuff, but she loved it. So it must be wonderful and perfect.
We don’t eat parrots.
We put them in cages.
Anne - you think you know everything about Brazil. Just because you read something. You shouldn’t belive everything you read or watch.
As you like wild life and things related, you should see somethings with your own eyes. Why don’t you go to the Amazon or Pantanal? See how it really is.
Nun, your whorishness is impressive and charming.
Anne, not so much.
HAHA That is Josh’s second quickening today! Mrs. Josh better be put on notice.
ROTFLMAO Josh!
And BTW, I care. It’s lonely on this vulture crag.
I saw your blog.
I didn’t have time to read everything yet.
what a motley crew we would be if we all met up and went to Applebees.
L Woman, I never travel, because no place on Earth is more beautiful than where I live, which is New Jersey, USA.
Put you parrots in cages because cut down rain forest is.
I may sound like Yoda. Hume looks like Yoda.
L, read March 6, 2009. That’s me in the picture.
My penis looks like Yoda.
Green, stumpy, and highly philosophical.
Applebees? I’m in. I like the Mozzarella Sticks or Chicken Parmesan Tanglers™ to start, along with a pitcher of Sam Adams beer. What will the rest of you have?
If we go to Applebee’s then I’m getting on the bar and dancing around with my shirt off. That’s how I roll.
LOL, I bet you never have to pay for a drink!
For Ben, we can order a OREO® Cookie Shake, or a Smoothie.
I’m not going if Ben goes. First, there’s no way he’s looking at my voluptuous ta-tas. Second, I’ll bet he’s a weepy drunk and that will piss me off and then I’ll beat the holy hell out of him.
Kind of like when Wendy kicked the crap out of Cartman. It would probably look exactly like that too.
Good - I wanted a floor show!
Anne,
I travel, and I was born in Jersey. If you for one second think that is the best place on earth you’ve got to move.
I’ve never been to Brazil, although I have been to Argentina, the northern and southern parts. it was amazing. I want to back to see the devil’s throat. You used to be able to pay locals to put you in a canoe and they paddled against the falls. One guess as to why that’s outlawed now.
Hume lost his penis in a bag of WHITE rice.
I like Hume, he thinks I’m charming and impressive. I’m easily swayed.
Josh, how can you possibly say there’s any place more beautiful than New Jersey? I grew up on a farm in the Appalachian Mountains, and frankly those ugly mounds of rock just can’t compete with the stunning views from the Jersey Turnpike.
I don’t need to travel. Cape May is as far south as I go. Mahwah is as far north as I go. Everything else is as trackless as Hume’s crotch.
Anne,
I read your blog about the foster kittens. My old man was the 7th in a litter of 7. I’m not entirely sure he was conceived with the rest as he was half the size of all the other babies. His mother wanted nothing to do with him. He wasn’t bottle fed, he was syringe fed and was deathly ill. His first year was really rough and I was always prepared to say goodbye but he made it to his first birthday and grew like a trooper. He’s almost 16 now and I love him so much.
If we go to Applebee’s I’ll flirt with the bartender. Assuming he’s a dude.
Nun, sometimes female cats do it when they’re already preggers and get preggers a second time. That’s probably what happened to your old man. I remember you saying he was sick awhile back. Is he OK now?
*Anne cares*
Just not about Brazil.
if i’m running late due to a mid-june blizzard you guys can set me up. you know what i drink: that’s right, booze. and, johnson-824, nice penisFACE.
There’s an Applebee’s in Newton, NJ. See you there in… eight hours.
Anne, #829… I know, it’s what I suspect happened as well.
Old man has CRF, it’s just a waiting game and I try to keep him as comfortable as possible. He has good days and bad days. His good days are good but his bad days can be pretty bad. I’ll be a mess when nature takes it’s course.
.
.
.
Also, Anne… hemp is very strong. I agree with Mom regarding Princess’ desires.
Our Heavenly Father forgot to give yoyo his divine comment award yesterday. today, if i had a vote, which i don’t, i would have to go with josh at 619 or 642. not that i have a say. because i don’t.
Oh, Newton’s just a hop and a skip for me! And we’re in luck, Yo Yo! It’s Geezers Who Speak Like Teens night! TTYL!
Princess is on my altar now, being a good fairy. Clap if you believe in fairies … Cracka???
that sounds….
annoying, actually.
LOL! BRB!
geezer night, i mean. good thing i’m not invited.
shut up, ben.
the rest of you————–fuck off!
have a gay weekend, y’all!!
Cracka, no one will be speaking Teen. We’ll be too busy drinking and laughing at the other tables.
Maybe Josh can do some standup.
Ugh. I hate when olde women like Anne
try to sound like they’re 16.
And that wasn’t a bag of white rice, Anne.
It was white Colombian. I stole it from Nun.
And after you got into, you started flashing
your droopy knee-knocking breastases.
As I’ve said, though, your silver dollar-sized
areolae are nice, though, Anne.
The whole point is to drink until you can’t standup.
Yo Yo, eight hours from now sounds good. Mr. Johnson, that big lug, just demanded an early dinner. I’d tell him to go fuck himself, but he’s got a great johnson and the night is young.
Hume, I may be old, but you’re dead. So how’s that better than being old, bug fucker?
Don’t you have something better to do on a Saturday night, “Hume?” Like having zombie sex with Jessica Tandy?
Anne - can’t believe you never traveled because of that reason.
If you travel to somewhere else, it doesn’t mean they are better them the place you were born.
I mean it, you should really see the Amazon.
But the Amazon state. Don’t go to Para or Mato Grosso. They are cutting the trees there.
Check this place:
http://www.ariau.tur.br
But if you ever decide to go there, you should do it on July or August, best season
And if you do it, let me know.
I’ll be glad to meet you.
and then kidnap you and hold you for ransom. The Brazilian way! (or mexican, or any other place where English is not the main language)
It’s Friday, Anne.
Friday afternoon.
Not Saturday, when you watch bowling.
And yes, being a dead actor is nice.
Bug fucker is kind of funny, not unlike
Ben’s avatar.
About 24 % funny.
Kidnapping is only in Rio or Sao Paulo.
I’ve been misspelling “Brazilian” all this time. I’m a fucking retard.
Keep yourself away from those places and you’ll be fine
Bye
L Woman, I’m not much of a traveler. But I think I may be going to Cape Town, South Africa sometime soon.
It would make me sad to go to Amazon, because I have a pet macaw. He belongs there instead of in a cage.
Or made into a meatloaf, which is what I’m about to do with him.
What kind of macaw, Anne?
A loud one. Is there any other kind?
Chestnut-fronted (severe). Captive bred.
No, there’s no other kind than loud. My parents had a blue and gold. I have a cockatiel now but I’d love an African Grey.
You can have my macaw and Teenzilla for an ounce of Panama Red.
Deal.
I can get probably a grand for Teenzilla
in Portugal.
I’ll eat the parrot.
I could at least 500 bucks for an ounce
of your thick, lush pubic hair, Anne.
Very popular in Malaysia.
Go figure.
They burn it in small piles outside their homes
to keep away evil spirits.
Take Teenzilla out of the equation and you got a deal, Anne.
Hume, you are a sick fuck.
Nun, you are a wise woman. It’s a deal. The parrot in question is named Decibel.
I’ll throw in a cage, 100 pounds of bird seed, and my beloved grandmother’s estate jewelry.
Hume tried to fuck a keyhole. He couldn’t even unlock the door.
Hume’s dick is smaller than a pimple on an amoeba.
The electron microscope was invented so that scientists could see Hume’s dick.
Hume’s next movie is “Night of the Putrid Penis.”
Hume’s last sexual conquest was a dust mite. She dumped him for a piece of cat dandruff.
Hume lost his balls at the seashore. Couldn’t find them among the grains of sand.
The grains of sand said, “Jesus, who let these tiny little pieces of shit onto the beach?”
Hume Cronyn is proof that there’s death after death.
Damn, L woman didnt get the point of this blog, she almost gave my adress and shit to all of you freaks…
im going out now… get wasted and shit!
http://www.divine-interventions.com/baby.php
God, I definitely gave a question about this.
Would’ve responded had I not spent
the last 14 hours stuck in Anne’s love geyser
up to my waist.
It was like the La Brea Tar Pits, only
more viscous.
Also, Anne, my cowboy hat tumbled
down into your anal fissure.
I heard it bouncing off your rectal walls
about an hour ago as it was blown
to and fro like that plastic bag
in ‘American Beauty.’
A little help?
I think it was last seen laying next
to the scattered bones of the entire defensive line of
the 1972 Cleveland Browns.
Olde women like you are OK in my book, Anne.
Just give me back my hat.
I think my knees feel better than they have in years.
I guess soaking in your vaginal juices — though they disintegrated my Wrangler jeans — might be good for the joints.
Your labia reminds me of low tide at Dover.
Such fond memories. Thanks.
Hume, you are so far past ridiculous you would need a full tank of gas to get back there again. I do not let zombie pinpricks near my love box.
If you were better at insults this would be fun.
But you’re not.
You’re just a withered olde clam
with a terrible daughter and dead end job.
To know that I’m ruining the only thing you care about — besides a cat that secretly loathes you — is pretty funny.
I don’t understand what you think you’re “ruining”, Hume. First, you’re not being clever enough to “ruin” Anne’s vagina as the only one who thinks what you’re saying is humorous is you… and maybe Cracka but he is also a card carrying member of the ‘I Don’t Have A Penis’ club. Second, I don’t think her vajayjay is the most important thing to her. I think it’s her husband’s johnson and from the sound of it, he’s built. So, you won’t ruin that for the obvious reasons, Mr. No-Penis. Sorry, man. Just calling it how I see it.
God,
Thank You for putting my loser kid on a team full of winners this year!!
Dear Miss N. Bizness,
Tongue in cheek is apparently not a phrase
with which you are familiar. Thought your familiarity
with tongues and vaginas was succificient to
embrace the concepts broadly applied herein, in re: irony, insult, bad jokes, worse poems, and other stuff.
Truly, as little as I care about this — I guess I’m slightly, and only slightly shocked — I thought you, too, liked to engage in dick/vagina/drugs/etc. jokes and insults.
If not, oh well.
Either have a nice evening or go fuck yourself.
Take your pick.
Regards,
H. Cronyn.
One more thing: Cracka is waaaay funnier than you, dear.
I bet you do have a nice rack, though.
Be well.
wow,
this one will likely hit 900
yes it will. to bad God has turned his divine eye away from the blog this weekend. He’s probably on another bender.
and Hume,
telling bad jokes and then saying that your intention is to say a bad joke is lame. Everyone wants to be the class clown by saying funny shit, not the class loser who comes by and ruins a good time.
With that said Nun has big vagina and Anne’s lady parts are old! Ba-Zing!!!
Like anyone who doesn’t have much dick, Hume knows when he’s been beaten… Off you go to deadville, old codger (who sounds just like that guy in New Zealand).
MY LADY PARTS AREN’T OLD! Some things, like wine and vayjayjays, get better with time. To think that someone has been sitting around spending quality time trying to find creative ways to insult my snatch makes me laugh!
Today is Druid worship. I will pray that the Salmon of Wisdom blesses all of you.
anne,
you do have a point. remember the old saying:
“goose goose ginny ginny, old pussy good as any”
but more truthfully there is no human body part that gets better with age
It takes very little time to insult your pagan-gina.
What else am I going to do? Work?
Funny that you should critique me for doing the
very thing that you are doing…which is sitting around
thinking about dick insults.
Besides, I like weathered clitorati that reminds
me of my Boy Scout pup tent.
And I ain’t going anywhere, except to get drunk.
Also, Anne, pussies get gray and wrinkly,
like everything else.
Trust me.
Oh my Him!! I think Hume just admitted that he has an old, gray and wrinkly pussy. That explains a lot, a lot, a lot.
And Josh is right, Hume. If you really believe what you’re doing is “comedy” then you’re worse than Jeff Foxworthy and his redneck routine.
Thanks, God!! Please don’t forsake them, O Lord. Many of them are serious Jesus freaks.
http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/news?slug=cnnsi-2009_bucky_brooks_03_19_seahawks&prov=cnnsi&type=lgns
don’t get your hopes up Nun.
THERE
CAN BE
ONLY
ONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Tonight Mrs. Josh will need to find a babysitter who’s hard of hearing.
pussy gets gray and wrinkly,
not for me, i only fuck “23 years old pussies”!
God, why you make me get sick today ?
sorry for everything, HEAL ME!!!
sorry for getting so fucking wasted in this weekend.
damn, this weekend was pretty good.
Nun likes big black footbal players!!
what a evil whore!!
I only like big black footbal players cocks!
Im a big fag!
sorry for everything, HEAL ME!!!
ahahahaah
nice, a fan…
get out of here idiot.
show yourself…
who are you….
maybe fag-Josh
Herb, if it’s evil to like big, black football players, I’ll gladly go to hell.
I love Colin Farell, I love Guiness, and I do love Irish people! Suck it!
I do believe that Irish people are Lucifer’s criation! Where is the Lord of Evil to assure this? WTF!!!
And I think you’re fucking envy about them because they can get a boner faster as you can ever imagine! After all, you didn’t criate them! haha.
And what about Venezuela??? You have been talking about Africa and Asia, but Venezuela and Cuba are the worst places in this damn world you criated!
Congrats, keep going on your amazing jobzzzzZZZZzzzZZZ…
I, your beloved daughter, have spoken!
God invented alcohol so the Irish wouldn’t take over the world! The Irish rule!!!