Prepare thyself, he who reads this, to tremble and quake before the Incredible Word of God, as written by THE LORD HIMSELF!
Today I would like to give a shout out to one of My most loyal and righteous followers:
Prince Says God Against Homosexuality
That’s damn right. Now mind you, once again, I must say that by no means am I against people being gay (in their minds), but I sure as Sodom am against anal sex. That shit is just plain gross.
Imagine! Sticking a perfectly clean penis into a shit-encrusted stink-hole. Blech! Only man could think up something so nasty.
Prince, I applaud you My child. By being brave and reaffirming to the masses that I, God Almighty, am against “people sticking it wherever and doing it with whatever,” you have totally redeemed yourself this day for the tens of thousands of times you stuck your penis wherever and did it with whatever.
And let Me say once more to mankind: ENOUGH! No more crazy sex stuff. Dicks go in pussies, missionary style, period end of story.
CARIDAD on 
Naytheist on 
Daily updated photo galleries of erotic nude girls and the hottest nude models. Home to the most beautiful young women and the biggest and best erotic art site on the web. Whether you like photos of young nude teens that are totally shaved, or older wome on 
Travis on 
Fuck that trash on 
HA!
“Then the LORD rained on Sodom and Gomorrah brimstone and fire from the LORD out of heaven, and He overthrew those cities, and all the valley, and all the inhabitants of the cities, and what grew on the ground.”
Genesis 19:24
nice album cover God. very, very very suspect. this one is also quite the doozy: http://mnmedia.musicnation.com/Blog/lovesexy.jpg
I apologize, God, for my blatant disregard for Your Divine Demandments but I would so let Prince stick his penis in my butt in the evil doggy style position. He’s fucking hot, God!
God,
I thought doggy style was a gift from You?
Also can everyone see Bridgette’s face? I can.
Blech…I see it too. Can’t be the ‘real’ Bridgette - no cross, bovine facial expression, or Twinkie (take that as you will, ya buncha pervs!) crumbs stuck to her face.
if I was the cracka stalker type, I’d copy her picture and feed it into some facial recognition software from teh future. but really I don’t care.
Happy days are here! The KKK is going to go bankrupt.
http://www.cnn.com/2008/CRIME/11/14/klan.sued.verdict/index.html?iref=newssearch
CRAP! WE’RE GOING BANKRUPT!!!
ha! we already know who bridgette is. why would we not know our own operatives?
Prince must be taking Prozac.
Bridgette looks as pissed as you, Cracka. Do you know her?
cracka,
I found your video online:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?p=9B2C85F1875A2706&playnext=1&index=20&feature=PlayList&v=V3oM_cjHfkY
bridgette looks pissed because she had to use a digital camera to take the picture and we all know science and learning are the works of the devil.
…as it is that science and learning are based at least partially on magic and magic is clearly the realm of satan…clearly….
Satan and Einstein are like “this” (crosses fingers) son!!!
Whilst station-surfing on my car radio last week, I heard R. C. Sproul blathering about why scientists shouldn’t try to debate theology, as they have now training in it. “Great”, I thought, “Now he will flip the coin and explain that theologians shouldn’t debate science!”
But no. With a few seconds to go in the program, he asked for money, then it ended. What an Azzhole! I sent them an email (from my junk account) detailing what I thought of this. Got a reply from a flunky which basically denied science, blah, blah. I replied and told him the Earth is round. Haven’t heard anything since.
the earth is round?
you fucking ethnics and your crazy babykilling analbanging hairbrained theories!!!!!!! AAAAAAAH!!!!!!
Yup. And bats aren’t birds, and there was no worldwide Flood. Unless it was the time God gave the world an enema.
The Old Farmer’s Almanac predicts God’s going to give the world another one in 2012, the nozzle goes in either Calcutta or Camden, NJ.
Got flood insurance?
i think i’m going to print off the atheist post and the science post and distribute them at abortion rallies.
i saw the “sunny in philly” episode about abortion the other night…freakin’ funnier than the time curtis raped dead ben.
The world is going to end in 2012. The Mayans and Chris Carter said so. Chris Carter is like our generation’s Nostradamus… watch The X-Files and look at some of the stuff that has transpired in reality. Honey bees, women regenerating their ova, obsessions with porn. It’s amazing I tells ya.
no it’s not, nun.
…ya crazy hooker…
too bad Chris Carter could not predict box office failures…..
Aw, man. I thought God finally relaxed his ‘no anal’ rule.
Phooey.
Anne: fried chicken, mashed potatoes and gravy, green beans, cheesy taco soup (basically fondue), and cherry pie.
We are playing a game in the laboratory today. Everyone is coming up with an alternative ethnic name for the day. For the rest of the day, I am to be addressed as “De ‘Shane”. Please make a note of it.
I posted the science post in our break room.
It could be argued that it was not a failure as it was never intended to be a box office blockbuster. Some of my fellow philes would rip your nuts off for saying such a thing, I try to be a little more civilized and know that since you’re a chinky-chong, your nut sack is rather diminutive and not worth the effort.
My ethnic name would be ‘Michael’.
Nun,
Some people would argue that the theatrical release dataes of both films (summer blockbuster dates of June 19, 1998 and July 25, 2008) would indicate the studio expected them to be blockbuster. If not they would have been released in film hell, the months of January and February (used to be March too but Zack Snyder is trying to change that.)
I watched the show from start to finish, I saw the first movie and the second is being shipped via blockbuster when it comes out in 2 weeks. Interesting the DVD is out only 5 months after a theatrical release? Some philes need to just admit the reality of the situation.
Some philes have a loose grip on reality.
Josh,
Maybe you should familiarize yourself with what the studio and the creators have stated about their expectations. A fall release would have probably been more apt but the studio did push for the summer release although they did not expect a blockbuster. They wanted to please the fans, which for the most part, they did.
Interesting how the DVD is out 5 months after the release and other films are released sooner than that. Seriously, Josh, that’s a pretty lame argument for saying that it sucked.
i believe it would be appropriate to make note at this time that josh should probably just fuck off. he is not fit to sniff scully’s tablescraps…then again, none of us really are.
hey, nun, did you laugh at the bush photo scene?
Nun,
All i know is the first film was a let down to me, i watched the show every week and the first movie was like a badly written episode stretched out for the big screen.
The second movie has made $67 mill. worldwide, so they recouped the production costs of $35 mill. but I don’t know what they spent on marketing and promotion. It is interesting that the original release date for the DVD was Dec 31st and was pushed up to Dec 2.
I’m not saying G. Anderson is not hot, as she is smoking.
I hope that spigot doesn’t go into Camden, NJ, because then I’ll be the first one fucked.
Curtis, ooops, De’Shane: Leftovers, banana, can of TaB cola. Starting to get paranoid that the Vo-Tech doesn’t need me anymore!
My ethnic name would be Norma Rae, and I’m vastly relieved to see that Ben changed his gravatar.
Cracka,
No, actually I didn’t as Bush really is an alien replicant so that little commentary on the truth just frightened me. Did you see Mulder’s sister? She walked by them in the FBI right before the Bush and Hoover sight gag.
Are you an X-Files fan, Cracka? If so, are you more interested in the actual investigations or Mulder and Scully making sweet love to each other? I’m getting so tired of the fixation of some of my fellow philes on Mulder and Scully doing the naked pretzel. I like porn but I don’t want to see that!
Josh,
The first film was a toughy. You have production of an hour-long dramatic series, you have the production of a feature film and then you have the production of the series again. I won’t say that they overextended themselves but I will say that that their plates were very full. I enjoyed the first film even if it was heavily involved in the mythology of the series and the myth wasn’t my favorite aspect.
In regards to the films, I only ever expected more intense and longer eps of the series as, after all, it was a television production. As I didn’t expect anything more, I was not disappointed. I like Fight the Future and I like I Want To Believe and I was satisfied with both even if IWTB contained more sap then I would have liked.
“It is interesting that the original release…blah blah blah”
i think you’re confusing the word interesting with not interesting at all!!
josh, fuck off. just fuck off. FUCK OFF ALREADY, WILL YOU?!!!!
DIE (again) JOSH DIE (again)!!!!
i am an x files fan.
i think we’ve gone over this before.
no, i am not obsessed with mulder and scully getting it on. that would be pathetic. i like the investigations. i like the dynamic between mulder and scully as well written characters with depth and brains. i don’t care so much about their genitals. at least not mulder’s.
Cracka is SO uppity today.
I just heard Jon Stewart singing on NPR “Fresh Air”.
He’s got a SWEET voice! This only adds to his sex appeal.
ben’s a faggot and loves cock on his lip
Ooops! I forgot to change my name.
i missed mulder’s sister. only went to it once, though. i’ll watch it a few times when it’s released. are they making another one?
that’s right jew!!!!!!!!!! BEN IS SUCH A HOMOSEXUAL!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! FUCKIN’ HOMO!!!!!!!
I doubt that Ben is a homosexual. He doesn’t attend any of the meetings.
I’m banning the Jew.
I like how The Very Incredibly Unpleasant Jew is specific and lets us know Ben only likes cock on one of his lips, I think the upper one. A cock is like peanut butter to Ben, it sticks to only the roof of his mouth.
nun,
Agreed the first movie could have been much better. You’re still my favorite, even if we don’t see eye to eye.
Hey Cracka,
I was going to say “fuck off yourself!!!” but then realized I don’t care about puerto rican guy in a rock band who gets fake angry online but doesn’t actually care about any of it as long as his fat PR wife and 8 PR kids get their welfare checks.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VpdB6CN7jww
I think we have too, Cracka but I wasn’t sure I was remembering properly… God’s blessed chiba… you know how it is.
We agree on the characters of Mulder and Scully. I love the way the characters have interacted with each other and I really enjoyed the character development through the years. I also believe the two fictional characters do indeed belong with one another, I just don’t really care to see it. I don’t mind knowing that they’re involved but I don’t need to see their kissing and sex.
Ben is a fag who enjoys getting a good dirty sanchez and pink sock.
Satan is at work!!!!
Japanese “scientists” aka wizards for the dark lord, have used stem cells to make a woman a new breast!!!! God gave her cancer and they had to cut her booby off, and these damn heretics used stem cells from her own fat cells implanted in her chest to make her a new tit!! This is clearly spitting in the face of God on so many levels. (Great news for fellow Christina Apllegate fans!!!!)
One of my college buddies used to deface Railroad Crossing signs in his hometown. He’d carefully scrape off one of the bars on the RR to change it to PR Crossing.
Special times, special times.
Cracka,
I think that depends on who you ask. I guess the real question now is whether or not the creative team behind The X-Files even wants to make another film. I’m hoping they do although I don’t envy their position at all. A bunch of fans will be pissed off if the next film doesn’t involve Mulder and Scully’s son in some regard.
Josh,
I never said the first film could have been better so we don’t agree, Ching-Chong!! I hate you with the white hot intensity of three suns for not loving The X-Files as I do!!
But you’re still my favorite too. I hate all my favorites.
I wonder if those Jap scientists (A velly cleva peoprle) could grow extra breasts?
didn’t they do that already in Total Recall?
“You make me wish I had three hands!”
http://www.themakeupgallery.info/weird/breasts/recall.htm
cracka-now with 40% more uppity.
i’m not puerto rican Himdamnit!!! i have 0 kids!!! my wife is not fat because if she was fat i would have to smite her for God and then she would be too dead to be anybody’s wife!!!
those sneaky fucking japs!! it’s infuriating how they always slip under the radar. we’re so busy hating the shit out of china and korea that we lose track of them and BAM! they’re growing new tits on some fucking smited cancer patient!!!!!FUCK!!!!!!
i wanted to print off the cancer patient post and distribute it in oncology but i am 100% sure that i would get fired and lose all hope of being rehired anywhere else in america. some people don’t get the joke about how life is so fucking ridiculous.
also note about God’s original post: Prince is going door to door like a regular Jehovah’s Witness to talk about God! Talk about someone trying super hard to get into heaven, I mean paradise. All the animals and tire irons that dude used in the bedroom and now he is coming out against the freaky-deaky! I don’t know which way is up anymore.
fuck. i can’t believe i forgot this:
prince is a j-dub (my wife was raised jehova’s witness, you can call them j-dubs—p.s.-she’s better now)
one of the RNs here has had two home visits from prince himself. we didn’t believe her the first time. so, she took a picture the second time. yep, it was him-in a suit-with watchtowers and a bible and everything. the poor guy lost his mind.
I had a friend who lived in Minneapolis before Prince was famous and used to see him getting freaky at the gay bars. I don’t care how churchy he’s gotten, just as long as he lets me touch his wiener.
according to legend he has let many, many people touch his privates.
i know a guy who was at a show at first ave back when prince owned it. he was standing outside smoking when prince drove up and tossed his keys to him and said, “park this for me.” of course, he didn’t. he just stood there and watched the tow truck pull his bmw away. what a dick. then again, i don’t care how famous you get, you shouldn’t treat other people like they’re your servants. fucker. fuck that perverted religious asshole and his overrated stupid songs. little red corvette—what a gay thing to sing about! fuck him!! DIE, PRINCE, DIE!!!
I have never watched a single episode of the X-Files.
I dated an Asian, so I know at least some of them are hung.
I’m glad the Japanese lady got her tit back.
The meals in Curtis’s cafeteria are created to kill the staff.
I guess you’re getting the picture that my computer is about to crash and I probably won’t be back today.
Little Red Corvette talks about how the chick is so slutty she has a bunch of used condoms. I would think that would be your favorite song, Cracka.
Maybe he’s just like his mother.
She’s never satsfied.
One of my staff members chose the name of “Citronella” for today’s game. She is definitely the winner.
Tomorrow, we’re choosing Hispanic names.
My cat’s breath smells like cat food.
*slaps Ralph with Mexican cock*
Ben,
pick one ident and stick with it!!!!!
you’re not smart enough to keep track of them all.
If you don’t want any more crazy sex, what is going to entertain me? I’ve been waiting for the apocalypse but you don’t deliver. Hell, a third book would be great but I digress.
http://www.app.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20081118/NEWS/81118039&s=d&page=#pluckcomments
i don’t care what the song is about. i assume all of his songs are about sex. so what? my theory about prince is that every says they like him because for some reason they assume that it’s cool to like him and uncool not to like him. but, noone ever listens to prince. people don’t play prince at parties. you don’t hear prince in bars. nobody reeeeally is into prince. it’s one of them conspiracies.
welcome back bloodvork!!!
shut up, cooper!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Cracka for once I agree with you. Something about that little man give me the creeps.
i mean it, cooper. if you expect us to believe anyone would fuck a cow you can just shut right the hell up and get right the hell out.
and, curtis, for some reason everytime i see (basically fondue) i chuckle a little cracka chuckle.
two years ago a kid in superior, wisconsin was arrested for fucking a dead deer in a roadside ditch.
true.
story.
I swear to Him, Cracka, you could eat their “cheesy” soups with a bit of bread on a skewer. It’s like melted Velveeta.
I don’t know what bothers me more. The fact that it was a deer or the fact that it was a DEAD deer.
gross.
That’s just wrong!
Say what you will about The Artist,
now that James Brown is gone, He
and George Clinton are the only
performers left who truly know how to make the music FUNKY!
what about Bootsy?
I’m talkin’ front men here.
Bootsy’s pretty close, yes..
Wind Me Up
Baal has a good and valid point about Prince and his funkiness. I’ll bet Baal has a nice looking cock too. You should send me a pic, Baal.
Send me one too Baal.
Nun,
Its just like yours … got it at K-Mart
They sell those at K-Mart? Wow, I should get out more often.
there are people with less fame who still bring the funk.
les claypool comes to mind.
his funk is rather nerdy…
We should all do our part to stimulate
the retail sector in times of trouble.
Go buy a Hummer!
josh claimed 69 for the negro contingency. fucking negroes!
or better yet Baal, have your girl give you a hummer.
oh cracka, your self hate makes me laugh.
i was parking at the x before a wild game a couple of weeks ago. dude pulls up next to me in a hummer and takes up two spaces. my head almost exploded. i started on him, “look at this asshole. the world is falling apart over this shit and he drives a fucking tank through the city streets. what a prick…”
then his 5 yr old kid climbed out of the passenger seat. i felt a little bad for a second. that guy deserved it though. 8 mpg AND he took two parking spots at a sold out game. fucking honkies!!
She did, but it’s just too big;
it hurts when I pump.
Nun, get over here and give me a hummer!
josh—i do it all for you, sir.
How about sticking one up the ass
of The Goobernator. (He’s the guy
who convinced GM to market them … owns serial # 0001)
Fuck you, Burro. You’ll pull out my teeth and rip up my gums with that hula hoop you wear on the end of your schlong.
The doctor said I wouldn’t have so many nose bleeds if I kept my finger outta there.
*has to slap Ben again with mexican cock*
Your doctor also said you’re retarded but it’s okay because God loves you.
Ba-zing!!!!
The auto industry CEOs flew private jets to capital hill to beg for money!!!
Some lawmakers lashed out at the CEOs of the Big Three auto companies Wednesday for flying private jets to Washington to request taxpayer bailout money.
Chrysler CEO Robert Nardelli, left, and Ford CEO Alan Mulally testify on Capitol Hill on Wednesday.
“There is a delicious irony in seeing private luxury jets flying into Washington, D.C., and people coming off of them with tin cups in their hand, saying that they’re going to be trimming down and streamlining their businesses,” Rep. Gary Ackerman, D-New York, told the chief executive officers of Ford, Chrysler and General Motors at a hearing of the House Financial Services Committee.
“It’s almost like seeing a guy show up at the soup kitchen in high hat and tuxedo. It kind of makes you a little bit suspicious.”
He added, “couldn’t you all have downgraded to first class or jet-pooled or something to get here? It would have at least sent a message that you do get it.”
Rep. Brad Sherman, D-California, asked the three CEOs to “raise their hand if they flew here commercial. Let the record show, no hands went up. Second, I’m going to ask you to raise your hand if you are planning to sell your jet in place now and fly back commercial. Let the record show, no hands went up.”
Do your bit for the environment. Whenever you see a Hummer in a parking lot (and let’s understand this, I’ve never seen one of the damned things off pavement), I key the paint, or try to find a board full of nails I can casually kick under a tire. The fools can buy anything they want, but they shouldn’t drive the useless pieces of crap.
Does Toyota need a bailout?
Those clowns also put full-page ads in all the local papers today claiming that the economy will surely collapse if we don’t give them what they want.
p.s. I don’t trust any company with the word ‘General’ in their name … all a bunch of fascists, and usually also into corporate welfare from Uncle Sam.
suck a fart out of my asshole, you fucking fascist pigs.
Did anybody hear about this 8 year old boy down in Arizona who was questioned by police without an adult representative present? What the fuck is wrong with authorities that they think it is appropriate to interrogate a child without an adult present who is looking out for the child’s interests?
Baal,
not even general mills? they make cheerios and lucky charms, not to mention wheeties and a host of betty crocker stuff, and lets not forget Häagen-Dazs ice cream!!!!!!
I don’t like your rule!
I like Baal’s rule simply because looking at that picture makes me horny.
nun,
they questioned the kid without a parnet because the kid shot his parent!!!!!!
seriously, they questioned him as a witness to what they thought was an argument between the kids dad and the kid’s dad’s friend. once the questioning turned to where the kid was a suspect, things should have stopped.
with that said, the little fucker shot his dad and his dad’s buddy! plus he reloaed the gun twice!!!!!! That kid is evil, and I don’t mean knivel style either.
Adult representation can apply to legal counsel, Josh. Kind of surprised you don’t know that. No 8 year old should be questioned by authorities without an adult looking at for them. First, authorities can be corrupt. Second, children that age have no idea what they’re fucking talking about.
As for your claims about what this kid did, where exactly are you getting that information?
i think the cops should be able to do whatever they want to anyone as long as the cops are beautiful women and their uniforms show lots of cleavage.
there can be only one!!
from CNN.
i’m not saying that their methods of questioning him where right or even legal. there is no question that the tape will not (can not) be admitted as evidence, nor should it have even been released as it is part of an on going investigation. i think that was wrong.
I’m just saying the kid shot his dad, and then elledged abuse, and when that was looked into it was proven false. The kid knew he was wrong hence the lies, and his own admittance he’s “going to juvy.” The kid changed his story and said he shot his dad so he would not suffer. there is a disconnect in the kid’s brain, very dexter.
but then again all the info I have is based on what the kid said, and he could be lying.
and cracka, century quickenings are so last week.
104
104 is where it’s at now.
I have serious questions as to how much of what that child has stated is the truth. Children that age don’t truly understand the consequences for actions like that. He may be thinking that he’s coming off tough or cool when he says some of the things he says. I’d also be interested in knowing what kind of things this child was allowed to watch on television and how he has been raised.
very true nun, look at all teh shit cracka says so he can seem cool or tough or white.
the only fact we have is the father taught the kid how to shoot and wanted him to “not fear guns”. This story is based on a statement given my the child’s priest.
Iraq does not want us in their country. I’ve been saying it all along but most Americans are too clueless to realize it. I think this pretty much backs up what I’ve been saying… they don’t want us there.
http://www.mcclatchydc.com/117/story/56110.html
yeah, but the stuff i say is (falsetto voice) awe-sooome.
Josh said: “the only fact we have is the father taught the kid how to shoot and wanted him to “not fear guns”.”
If the kid did shoot him, karma is a fucking bitch sometimes.
iraq loves us.
they are like a girl in a revealing dress walking alone at night down a poorly lit street.
their lips say no, but their oil fields say, “hells yeah!”
Nun,
Have you heard the Wanda Sykes joke about Iraq?
They say we’re over there to bring them freedom. But I don’t remember the salve shooting at the Union Soldiers.
(in “slavey voice”) “If dem soldiers come here with dat freedom, I’m shootin dem dead.”
slave not salve!!!!!
if someone shoots a soothing salve at me and it keeps my skin from chapping i would probably thank them…once i get over the whole shooting at me part.
I like salve shootings, as long as the shooter is a penis.
Who’s seen the new trailer for Star Trek?? I’m no Trekkie but I might just go the the dreaded cinema for this one.
http://movies.yahoo.com/feature/star-trek-trailer-blog.html
i saw that and the trailer for Wolverine!!!! 09 might just be a great year at the movies.
i saw it last night when i went to the 007 movie.
it started with a voice saying, “my name is james tiberius kirk” then it was a lot of quick visual edits with a building drum crescendo that ended with somebody saying something nondescript about space…maybe? i jizzed a little bit in my shorts i think.
the trailers all looked pretty good.
‘09 may be the year of not so disappointing blockbusters.
Simon Pegg as Scotty… not sure how I feel about that but I do love me some Simon Pegg.
My brother went to school with one of Doohan’s boys, young pothead he was.
And I’ve noticed from proofreading some of my posts that I’m retarded like Josh and my burro today. Sorry about that, guys.
I’ve got a crush on you, Bloodvork. I want to be your sex salve!
Josh isn’t retarded! That’s a hysterical typo.
cracka,
whow was 007?
Anne,
nun is right, I am retarded, or a tard for short.
An Asian tard, you ought to do the sideshow rounds. If you can poke holes in various parts of your body then you might be able to get on with Jim Rose.
Asian tard, Hah!
Bobby Lee already nailed that.
nun,
despite what you might think no one wants to pay to see an asian retard, i mean they pay to throw things at me but not just to see me.
ching ching durrrr
xing xing,
Maybe you need more God in the
retard act, like Steve and Kathy Gray?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yb9DF16Fx8k&feature=related
That picture of the naked man makes me feel funny.
If prince ever came to my house to witness for jehovah, i would invite him in and listen attentively and every so often ask him about that charlie murphy pancakes-basketball story.
i disagree with your theory cracka. many people may not care for him personally, but everyone loves his music when it comes on. 1999, when doves cry, i would die 4 u, raspberry sorbet.
at least he’s not Michael Jackson. I’ll take a Jehovah’s Witness over a pedorast any day.
I care about what a mentally unhinged musician has to say about homosexuality. I’d care as much as if Michael Jackson or Jay-Z said the same thing. I pity him for having such an inferior, unenlightened mind. What’s he going to say tomorrow, that being gay is OK if it’s done in his hot tub five miles beneath Paisley Park? Haha Michael Jackson wants to “save the children” but we all know what for!
All that talent don’t give you sensitivity, or intelligence, or compassion or a sense of decency for that matter.
Look at God: “Lord” of the Universe and yet he never foresaw how humans would use their buttholes for sex! Then he condemns it! Haha!
BTW America is the only country in the world that tries to pass off “freedom” as “killing men, women and children defending their own country from American invaders.” No other country is as bald-faced douchebaggy about Imperialism as the United States, you gotta give ‘em that. Vietnam/Iraq/Nicaragua it’s all the same American bullshit just different presidential assholes.
just when I thought a ching chong tard like me was the dumbest person in the world i see this:
http://www.cnn.com/video/#/video/bestoftv/2008/11/19/pn.most.outrageous.email.scam.cnn
A blow for Curtis’ kind, eHarmony forced to offer same-sex listings:
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20081119/us_nm/us_gay_marriage_eharmony
Josh, that Nigerian scam has been around for years, why are people so stupid?
If I were her husband, I’d have had her committed a long time ago. Or hid all the checkbooks.
yo yo,
the scam was not only around for year but this woman was told by a finacial advisor she was being robbed, and she kept sending money. if i was her husband I would divorce her, then sue her.
I don’t know how eHarmony is going to do this since they are based on hooking up very religious couples. No atheisists allowed on eHarmony. Not saying gays are not religious, but they sure ain’t hard core southern baptists screaming about how being gay and abortion are the roads to hell.
in other news NYC is trying to pass a law allowing abortion clinics to prosecute protesters without the help/need of any of the women who were at the clinic for abortions. if that passes then things really change.
if there aren’t any more anti-abortion rallies, how am i supposed to get laid?
Cracka, Bridgette is the usual woman at these rallies. Do you really wanna tap that?
…Or were you making a play for the men?
Josh,
First, ching ching durrr made me laugh out loud. Second, you might be surprised how many gays are very religious. I often wonder how some of them can go to weekly services at a place that teaches them their lifestyle is wrong but it’s what they tolerate to worship God. Needless to say, I don’t necessarily agree with that particular viewpoint.
eHarmony said it will launch the new same-sex dating site, named “Compatible Partners,” by March 31. So, it’s a different website. Must be a lot of angy Bible thumpers there.
Not sure I see the need for a lawsuit, aren’t there other gay dating websites?
TOTALLY OFF SUBJECT:
We need a VPN to connect with a satellite office. I’m not a network engineer, but have been saddled with this task.
Does anyone use a VPN service, or know what questions I should ask to get one set up? I think it should be outsourced, either to a service, or just have someone set up the VPN and show me how to maintain it.
So far, we’re using GoToMyPC for a couple of people, but want to hook up everyone else (only 14 people total).
Also, we are getting laptops for some field workers, they want to be able to remote connect to the office.
josh-ching ching durr made me audibly laugh as well.
emotions run high at these rallies. you need to understand, the women there have been abstinent for years. they are balls of sexual frustration. they get screaming at “whores” about “murder” and they get pretty excited. the foreplay is all done for you, all you have to do is stick it in…or roofy those bitches.
That’s true, I’ve heard of lots ‘o sex at revivials - usually the pastor banging the choir, etc.
So, they thump more than Bibles?
josh, ching ching durr made me grin. But you must remember, I’m from New England, that would be the New York equivalent of a belly-laugh.
gotomypc is pretty good. I used that when we were doing virtual offices. a little on the $$$ side though.
Nun,
One of my bestest childhood friends is gay as a 3 dollar bill, yet he is the chior director in two churches, both of which preach against gays. CRAZY!!!!
The gays be crazy, Josh. You’d know that if you weren’t a chinky tard.
Fucking cute.
http://www.cafepress.com/cp/moredetails.aspx?showBleed=false&ProductNo=28877681&colorNo=0&pr=F
that’s why i hate everyone.
Gosh, I miss so much when I have to work away from my desk.
Stupid Job.
Anne: Baked ham, candied sweet potatoes, winter vegetable mix (basically broccoli and cauliflower boiled beyond recognition), vegetable beef noodle soup, and banana pudding.
Today is pic a Hispanic name in our laboratory. I am Jesus (pronounced “hayzoos” of course).
Now off to a meeting.
Stupid job.
You hate everyone because gays are crazy?
Oh yeah, I do go to Mass but only if the hunky priest is giving the Eucharist. I have an active fantasy about him.
I think cracka hates everyone because I’m a chinky tard.
curtis, the hunky preists is probably having a fantasy about you too.
The priest is only thinking about Curtis if Curtis is 10.
you’re both right.
I hate everybody because Cracka lives, breathes and exists on the same planet as I. Damn you all!!
nun,
curtis has a boyish look about him. He’s a preist’s dream: little boy face, big boy penis .
Curtis does not look like a tiny, twinky fag, Josh. Therefore he does not have the small, little boy, tight virgin butt that priests dream about.
guys, stop fighting, we can just ask him:
curtis, what kind of a faggot are you, anyway?
Do gays come in kinds? Or flavors?
Cracka, more than half the people I see protesting abortion are dudes. WTF? That sucks.
Hi, it’s me, Anne. Teaching driver’s ed at the Vo-Tech today. my opening line: “Don’t get your license. it’s too dangerous to drive in this state.”
Curtis, I just had a bowl of pasta fagiole to die for. And a chicken parigiana sandwich with fresh steamed asparagus instead of fries.
I’m watching my girlish figure so I can romp with Nun’s burro. Or Bloodvork, whoever gets horny first.
Curtis is Southern fried from eating that cafeteria food.
I want to get funky with Bloodvork too. His tongue intrigues me.
Cracka, I’m not sure what kind of gay I am. Regular, everyday type of gay guy. How does one label oneself?
Anne: your lunch sound fantastic!
Josh: I could only hope my priest would have a fantasy about me, but sadly, he shows little interest. Boyish look? Bless your heart.
Nun: My ass is probably bigger than your fun pouch by this point.
I thought we were friends Curtis, everyone knows in southern speak that
Bless your heart = fuck you
Example:
Me: Granny, you need to learn how to program your DVR, I can’t come over and do this every month.
Granny: Oh bless your heart boy, and pass granny her sipping tea.
Sorry, Josh. I reckon, down in Appalachia were I come from the phrase can be used either way.
*where* - Lordy!
Homos are supposed to be smart, Curtis/Jesus. Please don’t make that mistake again.
no worries C-Town
in other news it looks like Bridgette faught the law and she won:
http://www.theindychannel.com/news/18022485/detail.html
Josh,
Did you notice that God made a comment on that site? He says there is no Santa Claus.
NO SANTA CLAUS!?! Why, God? WHY??? 
heheheh:
http://www.cafepress.com/mediareform/6148859
TUBES!…the Internet is not something that you just dump something on…those tubes can be filled…
Nun,
That was not Me but some cheap imposter. There is most definitely a Santa Claus.
fucking God imposters!!!!! they’re the reason i hate everyone.
i bet you that imposter was white! usually people who get on the internet and pretend to be the one and only true God, it’s a white dude with a little penis.
Whew!! Thanks, God! I’ve been letting Santa fuck me every Christmas because, well, You know, it’s Santa!! Anyway, for a second there I was really nervous.
ho, ho, ho
josh-that’s preposterous. it’s the serial killers that are usually white. God imposters are usually asian.
Asian tards.
ching ching durrrr
wrong cracka!
If that God imposter was asian his post would have said “there is no santa craws”
Josh just passed go and collected $200 in Funnyopoly.
you’re right again, josh. in fact, that’s precisely how God imposters are usually caught. either we have a clever asian on our hands or some whitey is posing as God online instead of in his serial killer fantasies. holy fucking shit.
Anne is high on her funny pills and is easily amused today. So am I because “Santa Craws” is fucking hilarious. Good show, Chinky Chong.
racism is funny!
wow, that’s two in one day. josh, you’re on today. go to the comedy club and make sure someone’s recording that shit. DO IT, MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!
shut up, ralph.
Ahhhh … funny pills … mmmmmmm …. burro breath ….. what a good day ……
Must be some other jackass. They all look alike.
Ben,
Racism is hilarious.
cracka,
So how was 007? It’s getting very mixed reviews.
http://www.pyzam.com/funnypictures/details/6857?cat=poop
it was entertaining. it depends on what you want from your bond movies. some people get all pissed that he isn’t funny and charming and that he has feelings and he drinks a beer and he doesn’t say , “bond, james bond”. if that would bother you, then you’ll hate it. it’s a little hard to follow. they don’t explain much. but, if you don’t mind thinking a little bit during a movie the plot will make sense to you. all in a all. i liked it. i wasn’t sure i would. it’s a little cheesy with the effects here and there, but aren’t they all?
personally I like my bond the way Iplay him in the video games, shooting people in the head and punching them in the balls. So i’m gonna love this movie.
Does anne like the smell of dick and tacos?
does she like the smell of man-tacos?
speaking of man tacos, when was the last time we heard from smarmy buttsmuggle?
Maybe she just her taco with burro sauce?
Ai! Stupid english! What I meant to say is perhaps she likes her taco with burro sauce
I love the smell of burro sauce in the morning. Smells like victory.
Annemarie Ursula Alvarez de Colon.
Oh, Jealous. I have to write 600 words about an author whose book is called “Growing Up Asian in Australia!” HOW CAN THIS HAPPEN? I THOUGHT THEY DIDN’T LET ASIANS INTO AUSTRALIA!
Do you know what that’ll do to all those extra-large Aussie mancocks?
Must be happening in NZ too. Smoggy’s probably shacked up somewhere with some Asian refugee. Pitiful.
dracula69 just sounds likes some gay goth guy is biting your penis with his fang dentures. ouch!
there can be only one!
My burro stole my joke about burro sauce on tacos!!
Damn you, Burro!! DAMN YOU!! 
Yes, but he’s your burro, lucky girl.
yeah, what’s spanish for faghag?
Yeah, I’m so lucky… I have a thieving burro.
that’s what you get for trusting a spic.
Fag Hag in Spanish
“Mari Pili” (Female first name. Usually referes to a very pretty and sexy girl that feels ’safe’ with her gay friend/s.).
“Mari Liendres” (”Mary Nits”) is also used, but on a more pejorative tone.
*suspicious* Josh, I thought you were Asian. How do you know the Spanish term for fag hag?
great. just fucking great. we’ve been infiltrated by a chinky ching chong wetback spic nigger fag.
anne I found out the term the old fashioned way: The internet.
do you think a ching ching tard like me even knows what pejorative means? No. But i do know copy and paste.
I’ve decided that all of us followers of God’s Divine Blog are retarded. So retarded that we probably disgust God. Poor God.
Poor us. 
We don’t disgust Him, he loves us but not our parents.
You see, Ching Chong, you don’t pay enough attention to the Engrish language. I never said He didn’t love us. I said we are so retarded that we disgust Him. Sure, He loves us. That’s just the kind of Great Divine Guy He is, until He gets Divinely Pissed.
http://www.engrish.com/wp-content/uploads//2008/11/remove-shoes.jpg
He loves us, but we disgust Him. it’s like a kid with perpetually poopy diapers that won’t stop whining. that stupid kid’s dad still loves that stupid kid.
got it, ching chong tard-boy?
Double whammy: I’m retarded, and he doesn’t love me.
PS: Fuck the internet until it weeps for mercy.
Cracka, I’m ready to get drunk. How bout you? The bar down the street serves retards.
meso sorreee!
Waaaaataaaaa!!!
That’s better! The internet is an over-large pile of burro apples, dripping with sauce and garnished with eyestrain. FUCK IT!
*again confused* But wait. I thought you were a real person, Josh. Asian, but a person nonetheless.
foolish Anne!!!!
Everyone knows Asians are robots sent from the future to steal hip hop and trick white men into diluting their race!!!
I’ve said too much
*throws smoke bomb*
Me fail English? That’s unpossible.
Ben,
you you said that with the Ralph picture it would have worked. But I see you as a penis on a bomb.
“it tastes like burning”
I see Ralph. I thought it was actually one of the most clever things poor, sweet, retarded Ben has ever said.
oh well I guess my shitty computer sees old avatars.
It is smart, and witty, Conan is a great writter.
yes, anne, i am not only ready to get drunk…but i am halfway there. josh—to the club with you.
nun-whore
ben-shut up
anne-fuck off
I hate Eastern Standard Time with the bleak cold intensity of extreme Outer Space.
cracka - Eastern Standard Time robs me of my urge to fuck. I need a good burro.
How does a burro help you have an urge to fuck? If all burros do that kind of thing then I have a defective burro. Damn you, burro!! DAMN YOU!
They are notoriously stubborn. It seems counter-productive.
I enjoy flogging him on a daily basis. It helps ease my wrath.
dicks go in pussies. ahahhahahahah. end of story.
that’s right, meg. try to stick one in your butt and SEE WHAT HAPPENS!!!!
we’ll have to change your name to funkybuttlovemaegan
Stick one in your buttt…coincidently, someone just sent me the old joke about the monkey who ate everything and the cue-ball.
For all you ‘conspiracy’ types out there. (The FBI knows who you are.)
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/picturegalleries/howaboutthat/3477148/The-greatest-conspiracy-theories-in-history.html
Thought for the Day:
God created mothers since He couldn’t be everywhere.
- old Yiddish saying
God created mothers-in-law because Satan couldn’t be everywhere.
- Abu Mami
I agree with some of those conspiracy theories. Some I had never heard of and some are a little on the nutty side. The 2005 picture related to the Tube bombings in London is quite fascinating in my opinion.
Prince William’s wiener is posted on the internet. For his sake, I hope it’s found by his handlers and removed soon. For my sake, I’m glad I got a glimpse before that happens although I do feel pretty shitty for violating his royal privacy. I feel really bad for these famous types who’d rather not have their naughty bits posted all over the internet.
if you don’t want you’re nuts posted on the internet, don’t piss in public.
he’s heir to the largest wealthiest, most land owning family in the world, I’m sure McDonald’s would have let him use the john without buying anything.
did you kill at the comedy club last night or did you waste all your wit on us?
i killed at my house while I watched last nights episodes of South Park, Life and Law and Order.
i killed on Saturdday at a club in NY, that was fun.
South Park was fucking hilarious!! Butters gave Cartman a hickey and then, confused by his sexual orientation, puked in Cartman’s room. HAHAHA!! Poor Butters.
the only way to be a nonconformist is to dress like us and listen to our music…
SMOGGY!!!!!!!!!
should we be worried?
somebody call new zealand and ask them if they’re missing a smartass, lymrick-writing sheepfucker.
I tried looking up a Smoggy Batsrubble to see if anything untoward had happened to him but, for some odd reason, he doesn’t even seem to exist. Methinks Smoggy lied to us about his name.
Oh, some of the ads on the sidebar are for The X-Files. God loves me! He really loves me!!
I’m full of so much love for You, right now, God. My poor little mortal heart is bursting with love for You.
Those stupid idiots at TWoP!! How can they have a list of the 11 scariest X-Files episodes and not include Irresistable and Orison??
Sanguinarium is on that list… yuck… that’s a crappy episode… yuck!
nun,
do you really know all the episodes by name? wow. I only know them by plot, like the episodes where the deformed freaks fucked their mom.
That episode is called ‘Home’. Yes, I know them all by name. Quiz me if you think you can, Chinky Chong.
Coolness!!
http://www.80stees.com/pages/t-shirts/X-Files-t-shirts.asp?referer=gog-paid&s_kwcid=ContentNetwork|2156082684
I don’t have any of those. I like the two on the right, especially that glowing X one.
are there no limits to your nerdiness?
HA HA! Cracka, there really isn’t.
count fagula oughta know.
heh… Count Fagula… I didn’t want to be the first one. He’s right though, there really is no limit to my geekiness. I’m a collector of all things X.
One of my most treasured X-Files related items… a personalized thank you card sent to my dear, sweet burro for his assistance with 1013.
for you, nun, with sympathies (from a ’sota fan, that’s sayin’ something):
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/11/21/sports/21washington.html?_r=1
wtf is 1013?
josh wants to believe
i posted a link for you, nun, but it’s not here. i think postitis is contagious. would you please stop spreading diseases? for fuck’s sake…
Cracka,
Any diseases you’ve contracted did not come from me but instead came from Ben’s diseased asshole. I told you not to go there, dude.
What was the link to?
Josh,
For somebody who claims to know something about The X-Files, you don’t know shit. Look up 1013 and you’ll see what it is.
umm Nun, I know about the show as in I watched it. I’m not stalking chris charter and his birthday, or his production company. I like the show, I just don’t like the show.
today’s ny times article about seattle sports.
Seattle sports suck this year. Is that what the article is about?
Josh,
I don’t believe that knowing that 1013 is the production company equates to stalking. Die hard fans know about Chris Carter’s birthday due to the production company being named after it and the fact that it featured prominently in The X-Files. 1013 as a date or a time or general number appears several times. I am a geek but I would never be able to tell you the badge numbers of Mulder and Scully but I know people who could. Believe it or not, there’s philes that are much geekier than I… those freaks.
Nun,
you’re like the little bear of geekiness, not too geeky, not to cool, but just right.
Who here knows about DVDs? It is my understanding that all DVDs are coded to the region they are to be distributed in.
http://www.dvddeal.net/dvd/item.aspx?itemid=110C155242&VCode=google
These people claim to sell X-Files DVDs that are not bootlegged yet they’re region free. I say they’re most likely Hong Kong knock-offs. Anybody got a different opinion?
Nun,
you’re almost right.
regional encoding is done by the dvd manufacturers so that when dvd is released in one part of the world they dont have to worry abotu it being pirated someplace else.
there are non region encoded DVDs, and they may be legit. YOu can also remove the regional encoding if you know how, I would never do it because it’s illegal but you can easily download dvd decrypter for free and do such bad things.
back to you, you need to check and see if the DVDs are PAL or NTSC. If it’s PAL you will have wasted your money as it will not play on your DVD player anyway. We’re NTSC while most everyone else is PAL.
here is a really good article on the about.com site:
http://hometheater.about.com/cs/dvdlaserdisc/a/aaregioncodesa.htm
Nun: I came across this link, and I thought of you.
http://www.southparkstudios.com/episodes/
Full episodes of South Park!
Who’s your daddy?
Curtis, yesterday for lunch at the Vo-Tech they served us a full Thanksgiving dinner, including pumpkin pie. Except this year we had to pay $5.00 for it. In prior years it was free.
I can’t comment on X-files or South Park because I’ve never watched either one. I stopped watching t.v. when it meant I had to sit in the living room with my husband and/or kids and watch what they wanted to watch. Why would I want to be around my husband and kids? I just go to the bar.
… or is it the barn? No, I’m pretty sure it’s not a barn, because I’ve never seen Smoggy there.
where the eff is everyone?
I’m wondering where Smoggy is. He’s been gone for far too long. Do you think he is in jail, or worse?
he’s dead!! smoggy is D-E-A-D!!
we’ll have to have a wake later. everyone needs to recall their favorite smoggy batzrubble story and wear all black and show up drunk and accidentally knock over the coffin like that scene in “pet semetary.”
The body hair is an abomination.
Thou shouldst anoint him with wax.
The Irreverent Mr Black,
Are you related to The Talented Mr. Ripley?
No, Josh. Ripley was *talented*. Please don’t get us confused.