
Prepare thyself, he who reads this, to tremble and quake before the Incredible Word of God, as written by THE LORD HIMSELF!
GOD IS FURIOUS!!! DON’T FUCK WITH GOD!!!
Witness the impudence of ‘iambetterthanyou’:
Now normally, you all know Me to be a merciful and loving God. BUT CRITICIZING OF ME IS SOMETHING I WILL NOT TOLERATE!
‘Iambetterthanyou,’ AKA Drew Watley, DAMN YOU! YOU ARROGANT BASTARD!
I SMITE YOU!!! ![]()
HAHAHAHA! In addition to being stomped out by one of My Mighty Mooses, you are forthwith banned from My Congregation forever!



Well smote, my Master !!!
CONSIDER YOURSELF THE VICTIM OF AN UNFORTUNATE SMITATION!!!!!!!
that’s one smote motherfucker. ah well, he was too good for this place anyway.
Just goes to show you that you don’t fuck with God’s Holy moose.
boy, that guy sure was smitededededd
YES! FUCKING AWESOME! God I love you! that guy was a douche.
God Damn!
It looks like the moose wanted to stop pummeling that asshole a few time, but the Holy Spirit made him come back and step on the face again and again.
shut up, josh.
That guy was a serious douche. He deserved to be smile smited. Actully his avatar kinda looked like he got smile smited already, but the moose was a nice touch. Way to go Cous’
Hey Jew, don’t you have some blogs to ban, I mean unban then ban again, I mean just shut up.
banning blogs is so last month. you’re so behind the times.
Thank you so much, God, for the well-deserved smiting you have delivered upon iambetterthanyou. Well played.
Ben you are a douchebag. Now STFU before Satan cornholes your arse.
http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/sns-ap-sci-invisibility-cloak,0,2488607.story
I guess we can stop hiding stuff in Nun’s vagina.
shut
up,
cooper.
Alaska has the highest rate of incest and rape. Gov. Palin opposes abortion even in these cases. Perhaps that is why this moose looks like Palin.
do you know what I hate more than anything, God? SMUG FUCKING PRICKS!!!!!
damn, that was fucking brutal
….loveMaegan, are you having trouble spelling your name, Meagan? You know what I hate? Angry byotches who can’t spell their own name!
zeus she wasn’t talking about you dude. unless, of course, you’re a smug fucking prick
Really…my bad. And your name is Maegan, again my bad. And your blog is pretty cool.
Why is Maegan angry at “smug fucking pricks” and who is a smug fucking prick? Sometimes God is pretty smug, but I think he’s entitiled.
Jeez Maegan, you sound pretty pissed. Have you just found out your best friend is cheating on you? Two years is a long time married.
Lesson 1–never marry a dorky looking guy just ‘cos he has a huge schlong.
Friends with God!
http://www.funnyordie.com/videos/d328f7aa10
wow…..
Damn, Smoggy. That’s cold.
Perhaps the next victim can be smited by the illustrious Canada Goose?
You should bring these back: satwapunah.info/irish-deer/
That way, if one moose doesn’t do the trick, you can send one of these to show that you’re serious.
“Damn, Smoggy. That’s cold.”
I know Nun — but if you’re going to be cryptic and superior, it helps not to link back to a blog about having a $500 credit to spend on a handbag, and a life wasted watching every crap reality show on television.
God should smite her for being an airhead!
Damn, God. You opened a moldy can of creamy corned smite on that hosebeast.
That was like watching a low-budget moose hoof bukkake video.
smoggy your right, God should smite her…..
that would be a funny smite…..
does anyone out there ( other than God)
have a real job?
you guys arehere 24/7 and I love it!!
how do i get paid for blogging?
The Small Sinner
Small Sinner, we’re not her 24/7, and if you don’t consider nurses and doctors and hookers and lapsed pastors real jobs then fuck you.
And welcome.
committing only small sins makes you kind of a pussy anyway.
YEAH! small penis sinner.
And modeling is a real job, ya douche.
WOW Crystal….you’re a model? what kind? plus-sized?
ben is easily impressed. that’s why we tell him to SHUT UP!!! oh, and sorry, crystal, but posing for nauseatingly mindless pictures is NOT a real job.
I’m a Whore for God. I don’t know how God feels about that but whenever I get done with a john I say “God thanks you for your business”. It kind of weirds them out and I don’t have a lot of repeat customers but I do it all for God.
I do it all for you, God!!
Smoggy,
I didn’t notice that about the $500.00 handbag and the obsession with reality programming… my bad. You were absolutely correct in your criticism of her.
is maegan is one of those bird bath deep l.a. fuckers? if so, even people like you…hate people like you.
I’ve seen the light
thanks Ben
now I’ll have to comeup with smart ass remarks in order to stay current with the likes of uppity cracka, your friend crystal, nun ur damned business, Zeus, cooper, love Meagan and the rest of the gang!
Q: is Bridgette for real?
I think I’m in love
The small Sinner
shut up, smalls.
yeah, she’s real.
Well, I have a real job, but I’d rather be a kept man so that’s not working out too well. Oh, and I am also a part time Evangelist increasing God’s flock with pinhead sinners so that I can do anal (in secret of course).
When I announce that I’m running for President, I’m going to appoint Nun as my VP (because she has a fun pouch and sure to get votes), Cracka as my Secretary of State (because that job is kinda uppity), and Jew as my Secretary of the Treasury (’cause he’s be good with money).
I am not going to appoint Ben to anything because he told me to shut up once.
yeah, but i could never be as much of a cracker as condoleeza rice. she’s so-o-o-o-ooo white! ben could be an intern, we could tell him to shut up and you could cum on his dress.
yeah curtis if you ran for president i’d make sure not to vote for you….
anyways, you would probably get the u.s. blown up
what precautions must one take to make sure NOT to do something?
God, if i may interrupt your Divine God Activities for a moment, i have something that may be of interest to you. since i am at work i cannot link directly to it because those pesky ‘mos down at I.T. don’t want me having fun, but i think the writers on conan o’brien may have read your blog and, ahem, how shall i say this…ripped you off. God walks into the studio with a drink and tells conan he’s sick of humans and lists of some crap he hates. then jesus walks and says something pussy like, “aw dad, how long do i have to wait in the car?” it goes on from there. sue their asses with a mighty smite, God. intellectual property.
*off…lists off
VOTE VAGINA IN 2008!!
And whenever Curtis runs for office because that vagina will be me!
Everyone who votes for me will get a free toaster!
And I’m sending Random to Abu Ghraib out of principle.
but i don’t wanna go there…..
Wildlife Smitings of the Bible …. 2 Kings 2:23-24
As Elisha was walking along a road, some youths came up and jeered at him. “Go on up, you baldhead!” they said; “Go on up, you baldhead!” He turned around, looked at them, and called down a curse on them in the name of the LORD. Then two bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lchZZRMOqTc&NR=1
Hey Curtis, I’ll vote for your Presidency!!
Oh sorry…of course I can’t. Only authentic Americans can vote for which end-times skank gets control of the “BLOW UP THE ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD” button. Why should the rest of us care about such things?
Perhaps you could make me an ambassador? The US ambassador to NZ is traditionally a fuckwit who made a big donation–I know I could do a better job for you.
And don’t forget to make us one of your first foreign visits–there are some cute boys with tight bottoms down here in the South Pacific
it’s our planet, smoggy, you’re just occupying one insignificant, tiny little corner of it, for now anyway (don’t piss us off). if you don’t like it…stop being a foreigner!! you weird little whining little kiwi twat!!! now go swim with the stingrays and leave the democracy building to the grownups, okay? that’s a good boy. finish your vegetables.
you see any WMDs laying around anywhere?
Laying what, Uppity? Eggs? WMDs don’t lay anything except radioactive or bio-chemical trails. They lie.
Pissing you off is our national pastime cracka… So SHUT UP!
But don’t think you’re special–pissing off Australians is our national religion.
And anyway–God’s got his holiday home down here. He took over most of the South Island a few years back. When you Northern Hemisphere fuckers blow each other up, where do you think he’s moving to?
hey cracka, this is what the globe looks like from GOD’s perspective. Apollo 17 photographed it with the South on top. Then you northern hemisphericists freaked out and doctored the image:
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/be/Apollo17WorldReversed.jpg
And this is a map of the world as it really is. Just see which little maggoty, sheep-strewn country is top left:
http://www.wall-maps.com/World/UpsideDownWorldMap.htm
HA! Still think it’s your planet Nanook?
i know you’re new here, smog-breath. but, seriously, don’t you fucking fucks have sarcasm down there? go floss with a koala’s cunt hair, dipshit.
Sorry my humour’s too subtle for you cracka—you gristle-gripping, vulva-faced, dog-knob. Most cunts find the upside down map funny. [Sigh]. And for a while there I thought y’all were the exceptions that disproved the belief of the rest of the world that Americans can’t take a joke. Dipshit!
Or is the fact that when you turn the USA upside down it looks like Dumbo the elephant having a shit that’s too hard to take?
why do you two hate each other so much?
can’t we all just get along and be friends?
…..
…..
…while we’re at it lets push for world peace….
Hey! I like cracka–I think he’s cool…
wow…. so the world can be peaceful safe and happy….
…I’d never put so much effort into insulting someone if I didn’t like them. And cracka’s going to be Curtis’s Secretary of State–that’s serious shit. It’d be like pissing off Condy.
Smoggy Batzrubble translated from New Zealandish = ‘uppity cracka’
if curtis becomes president hes going to get the u.s.s into some ww3 and we’re all going to get blown up, but before that happens i’m movin to canada.
i’m sorry curtis but its true.
Nah…Curtis will be a great President. He’ll be strong and resolute. He won’t just bend over and take it…
oops…
shut up, ben.
DIE!!!! DIE, NEW ZEALAND, SCUM!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
upside down map, my ass.
go lick froto’s balls.
Koalas come from Australia, nutcracka…
And Peter Jackson’s already done FroDo’s balls.
why do you hate smoggy so much cracka?
……ll
……ll
==NZ==
……ll
……ll
……ll
……ll
……ll
cracka’s thoughts:
crucify new zealand
although how you would crucify New Zealand i do not know
New Zealand enjoys getting nailed.
i don’t give a reef shark’s ass where the F they come from!
i can’t wait until we bomb the shit out of all the terrorists in new zealand.
why don’t you go play “football” with your faggy foreign friends in your faggy foreign socks and shorts and pretend to get really, really hurt every time someone comes within five feet of your faggy foreign ass?
random. i don’t hate smoggy. it’s just what i do as a cracka. newbies.
DOD DAMN BUTTCRACKA–now I’m pissed! Real NZers don’t play football. We play RUGBY!
R … U … G … B … Y
Got that? The hardest contact sport on the globe. No pansy padding. No helmets. Just 30 men knocking the shit out of each other for eighty minutes.
Go to youtube, type in JONAH LOMU, watch the living rugby legend, and then we’ll talk about who’s faggy.
Go All Blacks!
Bugger–I was so pissed I called GOD DOD.
Sorry Jealous one.
yeah, rugby’s pretty badass.
Not bad eh? And youtube’s Massive Rugby Hits are good value.
Actually I like your version too–I never miss the superbowl.
the superbowl almost always sucks. real football is played in the mud and the snow and guys play with broken fingers and cracked ribs BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!! the superbowl is 120 minutes of commercials and perfect weather. it’s GAY!!!
Yeah–but sometimes you see breasts
I SHALL HAVE MY REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
First of all, I’ll take care of that shemale pigfucker known as uppity cracka.
http://www.glumbert.com/media/worstambulance
As for you smoggy, the Wallabies will make mincemeat of the overrated Dan Carter and his shit-for-brains All Fags
Ha! Knew it. A closet Aussie-fuck. Now we know the real reason God decided to smite you…
Prepare to weep this weekend when the ALL BLACKS cane your faces.
Smoggy,
Shut the Fuck Up!
Kiwi = Loser! NZ is the fake Australia, which is the fake Canada, which is the fake England. No constitution, no industry, and you’re still groveling to the Windsors.
Ouch… you’re right about the Windsors Tony Snow, they’re a terrible cross to bear. We’re crushed beneath the jackboot of the monarchy. The sooner we ditch our sad flag with its union jack the better.
[beaten smoggy tries valiantly to recover and think of a cutting riposte]
I hope McCain and Palin win. I hope God calls President McCain home in his first term. I hope President Palin immediately institutes a national “blow-a-moose day” and makes it compulsory for y’all…
Correction, Canada is the fake America, but we’re all the fake Great Britain because we are all either run or founded by Poms.
SOUTHERN HEMISPHERE OWNS INDYCAR, THANKS GOD FOR ANSWERED PRAYERS
JOLIET, Illinois (AFP) — Brazil’s Helio Castroneves edged New Zealand’s Scott Dixon by one-thousandth of a second to win Sunday’s Indy 300 in the closest finish in IndyCar history but Dixon took the season points title.
Yeah, I know, I’m a fuckwit.
Smoggy shutting up and signing off–have a good day cracka
“compulsory for y’all”
You from South Island?
No–I used to watch the original Dukes of Hazard