Stuff God Hates

Sep 12th, 2008 by God

Prepare thyself, he who reads this, to tremble and quake before the Incredible Word of God, as written by THE LORD HIMSELF!

I was watching ABC last night, when I caught this interview with the future Vice-King of America:

Sarah Palin on God and the Iraq War

YOU ESKIMO-BLOWING PIG-CUNT-WHORE!

YOU LYING BLUBBER-EATING COWARD!

YOU SEAL-CLUBBING….well actually, I rather enjoy the seal-clubbing, but that’s not the point. DAMN YOU PALIN! YOU UGLY BITCH!

You told everyone the truth; that the Iraq War is all part of My Divine Plan. And then you gutlessly backpedaled, as if suggesting that I would ever be in favor of a war was something crazy. It’s not crazy! I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again - I love creating new dead soldiers!

Well, now your son will be one of them! When he deploys in several weeks, no matter how you try to protect him from harm, he will die!

SO SPEAKETH THE LORD!

Tags: God, Lipstick, Pig

Posted in News

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200 Responses to “God in the News - The Iraq War”

on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:00 pm1American Psycho

thank you God! could you believe that pig didn’t even know about what the Bush Doctrine was? Even my 13 year old knows that much.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:12 pm2Nun Ur Damned Bizness

This woman is really, really scary. What’s scarier is that people are stupid enough to think she’s a good candidate without knowing one thing about her.

God,

What’s up with the weird HTML tags at the top of this post?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:23 pm3Zeus

Why doesn’t yesterday’s 9-11 post show up? God, someone is fucking with Your Divine Blog.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:27 pm4Zeus

I can’t wait to see Tina Fey’s impersonation of her on SNL.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:30 pm5Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Tina Fey is THE SHIT!!

God,

Please bless the Seahawks ASAP, they really need it, God. Please bless Tim Ruskell with a heart and Koren Robinson with a second chance. Please, God. PLEASE!!
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:37 pm6Zeus

The Seahawks are doomed. Da Bears on the other hand will at least be making the playoffs, again.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:40 pm7uppity cracka

the jags lost two starting guards. the seahawks lost their entire receiving corps. tom brady’s gone. injuries everywhere…and we sit here fretting about something as frivolous as who’s going to hold the most powerful office in the world?!! what does that have to do with ANYTHING?

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again: fuck.

no-o-o-o-o-o-ow….fuck off.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:42 pm8American Psycho

well said Cracka. perhaps it’s just too upsetting to think about…so people mentally escape to frivolity like the NFL….because Americans are pussies.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:43 pm9Zeus

Really, I know. It’s all in God’s hands anyway. Now back to more serious matters. Who ruined Seattle’s playoff hopes in ‘06? Oh yeah, da Bears.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:44 pm10Zeus

American’s are pussies, they’re idiots.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:47 pm11American Psycho

so we’re pussies and we’re idiots? don’t forget we’re also psycho
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:47 pm12Zeus

Excuse me, “Americans are NOT pussies, they’re idiots.” Haven’t had my 3rd cup ‘o’ Joe yet.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:48 pm13American Psycho

no, you had it right the first time
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:48 pm14Zeus

I agree with that we’re psychotic and more specifically scitzophrenic especially when it concerns foreign policy.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:50 pm15Nun Ur Damned Bizness

What are we supposed to talk about? I think it’s unlikely that God will smite Sarah Palin. Hopefully, He will smite everyone around her and then force her to live her miserable existence.

As for my ‘Hawks… they need a receiving corp BAD. Fortunately, the beginning of the season is a good time to deal with injuries but the Seahawks have far too many injuries and a depleted offense. Seneca Wallace is a great receiver and it looks like he’ll be playing in the number 4 slot… that’s something, at least.

And damn you, Zeus. DAMN YOU!!!!
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:50 pm16Zeus

Not to mention suffering from alzheimer’s.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:51 pm17Zeus

Nun, you’re sexy when you’re angry. That little blue star starts to twinkle.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:54 pm18Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I think that’s the acid you dropped, Zeus.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:54 pm19Zeus

Ihtought that was pretty kick ass of God to bless the Bears with stomping of the Colts in their season opener in the Colts new stadium. A little pay back for XLI.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:55 pm20Zeus

Hey, I only did that once in college. I’m sure the effects have worn off by now.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:56 pm21Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Heh… I’ll go with that, Zeus but only because they finally took that starting position away from Grossman. Seriously, did he give Lovie good head or what? I don’t care for the Colts at all.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:56 pm22Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Depends on how good the acid was.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 3:59 pm23Ben

God, can you please smite Palin/McCain ‘08? You said she is the future vice-King of America, why would you let that happen if you hate her so much? I thought you were backing Obama.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:03 pm24Zeus

The Seahawks played in a dome until 2000 and now they play on a field designed for soccer. How tough is that? SOLDIER Field, now that is a stadium.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:06 pm25Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Why do you say it’s designed for soccor, Zeus? It’s a beautiful stadium, I try to go at least once a season. Due to well-placed sources, I was on the field before the stadium officially opened… that was way cool.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:08 pm26smoggy batzrubble

God, please don’t harm Sarah Palin. She is a talented, sincere woman and I believe she will be the savior of the free world. Please God, she’s our only hope.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:12 pm27Zeus

In all honesty it is a nice stadium but was also designed to serve the Sounders. I’m just bitter because the re-design of Soldier Field is FUBARed.

Smoggy, I love it when your upside down head leads you to insanity. You spent way to much time with the sheep today didn’t you?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:14 pm28uppity cracka

shut up, smiley butt rumble. tom brady was our only hope, and now he’s DEAD!!!!!
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:14 pm29Cooper

And Nun thought it was Jesus that touched her.

http://www.theaustralian.news.com.au/story/0,25197,24334651-5006784,00.html
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:14 pm30Karin

Zeus
even god is afraid to be politically incorrect.
So much for being omnipotent. If I were american I would also fear the subversive theocracy that rules the USA, in spite of the constitution that separates religion and government.
In Europe no president has put god in the equation when talking about Irak.The portuguese president didn’t even meet the Dalai Lama at the airport when he made an unofficial visit to the country. Let’s hope he has the same guts once the pope wiil go there.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:16 pm31Josh

Smoggy,
Is Sarah Palin Obi Wan? Cut that only “holy hope” shit out.

God,
Can Tina Fey please play Sarah Palin in a sketch that not only rips her a new one, but will actually be something funny on that shit storm known as SNL? Thank you in advance.

God’s Prayerful Servant,
Josh
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:19 pm32Nun Ur Damned Bizness

It can certainly support soccer matches but I don’t believe that was the main purpose it was designed for. It was designed for American football but also designed to support soccer matches, concerts and even the fucking Olympics.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:20 pm33Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Cooper,

You’re not funny or clever so just stop trying.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:23 pm34Zeus

OMG Cooper, that is one crazy ass story. The only Greek that can place a curse on someone is me, and I haven’t been to Australia in years.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:25 pm35Zeus

The fucking Olympics, now that is something I would like to compete in.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:29 pm36Nun Ur Damned Bizness

It’s not the Sex Olympics, Zeus. It’s just the plain, old, boring Olympics.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:30 pm37Zeus

Damn it! Why do you disappoint me?! I was already starting to train.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:33 pm38Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Sorry, bud. You can still train. I’ll help you if you want. That’s the kind of giving person I am.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:33 pm39smoggy batzrubble

I love the way these crapped out old sex abusers start having “chest pains” the moment someone catches them molesting girls. Didn’t that fuck Fritzl who imprisoned his daughter for years do the same thing?

Praise God for Sarah Palin. If she becomes ‘da man’ we might be able to go back to public torturing. I’d pay for 5 minutes with Dennis Rader–just long enough to burn “Josie Otero” into his sad hide.

You got my Star Wars allusion Josh. I yhought that was pretty good considering it was 3am when that uberfuckwit Gabriel woke me up AGAIN to tell me there was a new post.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:34 pm40smoggy batzrubble

Ha!

Smiley Butt Rumble

…just got it
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:39 pm419/11

Ether is the perfect drug for Las Vegas. In this town they love a drunk. Fresh meat.HunterS.ThompsonHunter S. Thompson, Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:41 pm42smoggy batzrubble

I’m going back to bed–Latex Lucy wants to try a new position.

You should all watch this. The future of the free world is at stake!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7-NOZU2iPA8
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:46 pm43Josh

In that story Copper submitted, if Sarah Palin was the mayor fo the town where the people were assulted in the prayer meetings, they would have to pay for their own rape kits!

Let’s get someone who loves woman as much as Sarah Palin into office!!!!
on 12 Sep 2008 at 4:51 pm44Zeus

ZAP! I think it’s Palin at the keyboard. That is so gay I think Jesus would love it, well maybe if they threw in a couple hip hop verses.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:00 pm45Zeus

Damn it, if I were a Wassilia, Alaska tax payer, I wouldn’t want to pay for rape kits. It’s the state with the highest rate of incest and rape. That could get expensive. I would want to keep all of my state granted oil revenue. Besides can’t you just pick up a rape kit at Wasilla Bait & Tackle?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:09 pm46Ben

it’s also the state with the most excess money, and with the least need to make raped girls pay for their rape kits, henced the uber-fuckedupedness of it.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:13 pm47Zeus

If we retroactively give Alaska back to Russia and and the Panama Canal back to Panama then neither of the morons can run. While were at it we should give Texas back to Mexico for 8 years of Bush’s idiocracy.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:14 pm48Zeus

And where the hell is McBush’s flag pin? Why does McBush hate America?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:19 pm49uppity cracka

there is nothing more hopeless and depraved than a man in the depths of an ether binge.

did they find the god particle yet? because if they do, well, obviously that means there is no god and we can all stop fighting about it.

now, fuck off.

cooper? wtf is cooper doing here?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:22 pm50Zeus

The money pit called the Large Hadron Collider is not even going to operating at full capacity until next year. Careful with that “god particle” mumbo jumbo. You are in smiting territory.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:25 pm51Nun Ur Damned Bizness

If it does work it’s because God made it work so no questions will be answered definitively. God is so mysterious and cool.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:31 pm52uppity cracka

maybe god will disprove his own existence just to test our faith, the most virtuous of all character traits. just ask bridgette.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:31 pm53uppity cracka

i forgot to capitalize God.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:33 pm54Zeus

The 9-11 entry is not even on the list of entires. Perhpas it was even too risque even for God or maybe God is trying to get a Stuff God Hates book published and he doesn’t want the bad PR?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:35 pm55Nun Ur Damned Bizness

It’s on the list, Zeus. #19.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:36 pm56Ben

stupid zeus…that’s why you got no followers left
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:38 pm57Zeus

Shut up Neb!
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:39 pm58Zeus

Watch McSame fumble all over these questions on Palin: http://www.wcsh6.com/video/default.aspx?maven_playerId=immersiveplayer&maven_referralObject=850878100&maven_referrer=staf
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:54 pm59uppity cracka

oh, yeah, nun’s daily vagina: it’s like a minnowbucket that somebody haphazardly empty on shore to use as a receptacle for the guts leftover from cleaning a catfish. except the guts in nun’s vagina have little wavy hairs that feel like a cat’s tongue.

-ralph waldo emerson
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:57 pm60Zeus

It’s so quite in here today. Perhaps the Ben will begin fondling himself again.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:02 pm61Zeus

That one lacked the subtle creativity of previous “Nun’s Daily Vagina.” I’m gonna have to give it a thumbs down.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:06 pm62uppity cracka

yeah, i think i peaked at inside out manatee nestled in a briar patch. i think iamstillbetterthanyou ruined my mojo when he called an octopus raper. stupid, non-funny betterthanus.

don’t worry, nun. i won’t quit until i have a winner.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:07 pm63uppity cracka

anyway, i stole that one from emerson. so blame that malcontent, no talent ass “writer”, so called.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:09 pm64Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I don’t particularly care for any of them but it’s my vagina you’re dissing so no big surprise there.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:13 pm65uppity cracka

you only don’t care for them because you know it’s true that your vagina leaves a slimy slug trail to and from random guys’ beds where it juices its queefy barf matter all over their jerk stained adolescent spiderman sheets.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:14 pm66Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I think you’re just jealous that I won’t willingly fuck you.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:15 pm67Zeus

However did Emerson go from Leaves of Grass to “it’s like a minnowbucket that somebody haphazardly empty on shore to use as a receptacle for the guts leftover from cleaning a catfish. except the guts in nun’s vagina have little wavy hairs that feel like a cat’s tongue.” Poor tragic downfall of Emerson.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:25 pm68uppity cracka

jealous?! i got enough roofies for a decade of creepy date raping!

walt whitman wrote leaves of grass, zeus. i guess you only know about greek writers, huh?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:38 pm69Ben

Sarah Palin = Stupid. We need more opposition around here so we can face them. Where’s Bridgette when you need her?
I wish more republicans were atheist.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:40 pm70uppity cracka

no one’s going to declare a face on my behalf?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:44 pm71Zeus

FACE!!! Ha, I faced myself.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:52 pm72Josh

Bridgette is in chruch praying for Palin - McCain.
Life is easier when someone else gives you all the answers
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:54 pm73Yo Yo Ma Ma

Josh, that’s why the sheeple like Bush & company. They tell reasonable lies that reinforce the sheeple’s view of the world as Scary Place. But don’t worry! We’ll take care of you! Just sign your constitutional rights away…
on 12 Sep 2008 at 6:59 pm74uppity cracka

i believe zeus may be the first poster to self face.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:01 pm75Josh

through his actions, der dude and ben faced themselves.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:06 pm76uppity cracka

that’s true, soon to be dead josh. der dude must’ve had enough FACING for one lifetime. stopped posting here a while ago.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:20 pm77Ben

maybe he died….
….
just saying, ya never know…
….
it could happen.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:21 pm78Yo Yo Ma Ma

I miss der dude. He wa a thief and a terrorist. On the other hand, he had a tremendous singing voice.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:27 pm79Ben

I’m telling you, either he’s really busy or he’s on dead.

To Dead Der Dude,

You were my mortal enemy, but you will be missed.

Ben
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:31 pm80Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I miss Der Dude too.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:33 pm81uppity cracka

didn’t he pack up and go to costa rica to do some weird, witchy things with the locals?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:35 pm82Ben

oh yeah….they don’t have internet in that 3rd world hellhole
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:36 pm83Nun Ur Damned Bizness

He was going to open his commune. Maybe he’ll post again when his commune is up and running and ready for communers.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:44 pm84uppity cracka

sure, nun, like your anyone wants to invite your sea lamprey infested mudpuddle of a twat along…with the fruit flies constantly hovering over it and everything. it’s kind of distracting.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:44 pm85uppity cracka

damn typos!!!
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:47 pm86Project Openletter

Thanks for calling out Palin God. That woman’s a dumb bitch. Fo’ sure!
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:48 pm87Nun Ur Damned Bizness

The typos make you look like an idiot, Cracka.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:49 pm88uppity cracka

the fruit flies around your crotch make you look like a homeless prostitute.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 7:52 pm89Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Fortunately, your assessment of my vagina is not based in reality but unfortunately, your typos are painfully real.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:03 pm90uppity cracka

nun. what a cyber-whore.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:04 pm91uppity cracka

well, i’m going to get drunk now. who’s with me?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:06 pm92uppity cracka

i’m going to roofie nun’s bong water.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:06 pm93Nun Ur Damned Bizness

At least you spelled cyber-whore correctly.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:10 pm94anne johnson

Sarah Palin’s with you, cracka. I hope you don’t look like a moose.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:18 pm95anne johnson

See? I spend the whole day in a drug-induced haze, and when I can finally sit up, cracka takes the gang to the bar and leaves me behind. Fuck it.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:23 pm96Ben

i’m still here!
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:24 pm97Ben

they left me behind!
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:24 pm98Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Me too. I’m just not in the best of moods.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:25 pm99anne johnson

I feel so much better now. But I’m confused. I would think God would love Sarah Palin. She’s all about doing his dirty work.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:26 pm100anne johnson

You guys (and cute girls) ever been to church at an Assembly of God? That’s her church.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:27 pm101anne johnson

They use magic mushrooms for communion. That’s the only explanation for the behavior during the services.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:27 pm102Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Do Assemblers of Godders speak in tongues?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:28 pm103anne johnson

Why does God hate Sarah? It’s not logical! God, you’re retarded.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:29 pm104anne johnson

No, that’s too politically incorrect. God, you’re a hillbilly.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:29 pm105Yo Yo Ma Ma

anne, are you still trying to get God to smite you?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:34 pm106Zeus

Nun said “I’m just not in the best of moods.”

You just need a good rodgering. It always puts me in a better mood.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:35 pm107Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I do need that, Zeus. I also need to know that I don’t have to put down my best friend of 15 years but that’s silly serious talk and we have no use for that here.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:35 pm108Smoggy Batzrubble

It’s quite logical Annie. God hates women who want to be in charge. If America elect a woman VP there will be such a smiting.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:38 pm109Zeus

Put her down. A good snuffing is sooo much better than a 15 year friendship. Did she sleep with you cat?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:39 pm110Tony Snow

God hates Sarah because she (Sarah) is a hypocrite.

Matthew 23:27-28

Woe unto you, hypocrites! for ye are like unto whited sepulchres, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men’s bones, and of all uncleanness. Even so ye also outwardly appear righteous unto men, but within ye are full of hypocrisy and iniquity.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:40 pm111Ben

exactly….thank you Tony. God has every reason to hate her, just like us. A woman, and a hypocrite. How many of things on God’s list is she guilty of?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:43 pm112anne johnson

If God smites her warrior son, I sure as fuck hope it’s after the election and not before.

Meaning no disrespect, Tony, but isn’t Bridgette the only one allowed to quote scripture here? I’m new, so I might not know all the rules.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:48 pm113Tony Snow

This is a hypocracy, we make our own rules

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=hypocracy
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:50 pm114anne johnson

Okay! Sounds great! I make the rule that Smoggy gets to be God, Zeus has to clean Smoggy’s pasture, and God has to be a contractor who was hoping to build the Bridge to Nowhere.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:50 pm115anne johnson

And I get refills on all my pain meds.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:51 pm116anne johnson

… without being in pain anymore, of course.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:51 pm117anne johnson

Then I’ll get my own talk radio show and become a millionaire. I really love Stuff God Hates.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:52 pm118Smoggy Batzrubble

Wow Goddess Annie. You’re my type of hypocrat. Can you make the uppity buttcracka have to clean my toilet while I’m using it?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:53 pm119Tony Snow

Hypocrisy is a fundamental tenet of the GOP…they embrace it with all their dirty little hearts, and are proud of it. The idea of saying one thing and doing another doesn’t bother them at all; in fact, they thrive on it.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:54 pm120Yo Yo Ma Ma

Tony, which is why I am glad they don’t come out against murder - if any of them do, check their mansion’s cellars for bodies.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:54 pm121Smoggy Batzrubble

So how come the dictionary only lists democrat hypocrats TS?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:54 pm122Josh

GOP hypocrisy broken down by Jon Stewart:

http://www.thedailyshow.com/video/index.jhtml?videoId=184086&title=sarah-palin-gender-card
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:54 pm123Yo Yo Ma Ma

Smoggy, because the entry was made by a batshit Repuklican.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:56 pm124Yo Yo Ma Ma

And what’s the entry on ‘Hypocrite Eggs’ about? Never heard the term, sounds like whoever made the entry was getting in a dig at someone.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:58 pm125Ben

#7 Women
#17 Snitches
#30 Fat People
#34 Democracy
#42 Sex Before Marriage
on 12 Sep 2008 at 8:59 pm126Ben

Palin guilty of all of the above.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:00 pm127anne johnson

Ben! If she’s fat, you must bugger skeletons.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:01 pm128Josh

Ben,
she’s not fat. Everyone says they want to bang her, not me though because she’ll keep it.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:03 pm129Ben

i bugger skeletons
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:03 pm130Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Hypocrite Eggs is funny and made me smile.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:04 pm131Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Ben just wants you to think he buggers skeletons. We all know from yesterday that Ben only buggers himself.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:05 pm132anne johnson

His fingers must be skinny.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:06 pm133Tony Snow

Guilty of all but 1 and 5 of the X Commands?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:08 pm134Tony Snow

Smoggy,

Is hypocrite eggs one of those kiwi gestation tricks?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:10 pm135anne johnson

Can’t remember the Ten Commandments. Is one of them “Thou shalt not suffer thy unwed daughter to practice sensible family planning?”
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:11 pm136anne johnson

No, wait. I’ve got that wrong. The daughter’s supposed to be stoned to death. Not stoned like I am right now, but pelted with rocks. Back me up on this, Tony, I’m rusty on God’s stupid book.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:15 pm137Tony Snow

It’s not stupid … its the alltime #1 best seller
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:16 pm138anne johnson

But I’m pretty sure it says in there somewhere that if a girl gets preggers and isn’t married, she must be stoned to death.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:17 pm139Smoggy Batzrubble

Hmmm…hypocrite eggs,

I don’t think so Tony Snow–gestating Kiwi’s are traditionally very honest, as most humans would be if they had an object twice the size of their own head struck up their arse.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:17 pm140anne johnson

Oh man. Sorry I’m being so morbid, y’all! Let’s dress Zeus up in drag and lock him in the handcuffs at the gay bath.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:18 pm141Tony Snow

Well, yes … unless she’s the BVM
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:19 pm142Smoggy Batzrubble

Can we do those double cuffs that shackle his wrists to his ankles? And then stand him upright in a corner and tell people he’s an umbrella stand?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:20 pm143Tony Snow

Hah! kiwis are nuts about umbrellas
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:21 pm144Smoggy Batzrubble

Only when they’re lodged point-first between a Greek god’s butt cheeks.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:21 pm145anne johnson

Let’s tell people he’s offended God and needs to be punished.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:23 pm146anne johnson

And just for tonight, amnesty from “pray away the gay.”
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:24 pm147anne johnson

I’m still not getting why God hates Sarah Palin. He must be jealous of her cute glasses. Remember, he’s always a Jealous mofo.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:25 pm148Smoggy Batzrubble

Yeah–let’s get Zeus bukkaked. We could put as little sign on him that says “Spray the Gay Today”
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:27 pm149Smoggy Batzrubble

Sigh … it’s no fun trying to annoy Zeus if he’s off banging a dozen virgins somewhere.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:30 pm150Tony Snow

anne,

please review topic #42

I think you slept through that one
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:38 pm151anne johnson

Yeah, God could have smited my ass big time when he was writing that post. But he had bigger fish to fry, and I’m getting better now.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:38 pm152anne johnson

But when I see snakes, it’s time to lie down.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:54 pm153Tony Snow

hmm, lots of snakes in The Bible
you’d better lie down
on 12 Sep 2008 at 9:58 pm154Tony Snow

What do Druids do with snakes?
Revere them, detest them, ignore them, eat them?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 10:00 pm155Josh

Anne are you thick or something? God hates her because she turned her back on Him. She originally said that the Iraq war was God’s divine plan and His wish. Then she went on this interview and back peddled! God doesn’t want flip flopping servants! He wants people who will kill in His name and tell people they are killing in His name!
on 12 Sep 2008 at 10:06 pm156Smoggy Batzrubble

Yes Josh,yes! The American military is God’s great weapon. The high-tech sword of his righteous anger. How dare Sarah Palin reslile from her beliefs for short term populism. Smite her God! Smite her good! And smite the entire, unbelieving non-American world as well!

And then perhaps you could smite one of the planets named after the Greek god you most hate…
on 12 Sep 2008 at 10:08 pm157Smoggy Batzrubble

…and then, God, is there any chance you could smite my next door neighbor with a particularly painful urinary infection?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 10:16 pm158God

As I stated above, I will smite her Smoggy, now and forevermore.

As to your neighbor, I will take it under consideration.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 10:24 pm159Smoggy Batzrubble

Thank you God — you are just and righteous.

Might a plead for some allowance for Anne Johnson? Her happy pills have confused her mind. She knows not what she is saying.

Oh…and I await with humble interest to discover whether you think Zeus would make a good umbrella stand

Your servant Smoggy
AMEN
on 12 Sep 2008 at 10:35 pm160The Traveling Filipina

Dear Lord God in Your divine wisdom, please make sure You take her son from this Earth a hora mismo so she has first-hand knowledge of what other more-righteous families feel regarding the war in Iraq.

Also, Dear Lord God I applaud you for pointing out all her crazy flip-flopping.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 10:35 pm161josh is a faggot

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on 12 Sep 2008 at 10:54 pm162josh is a faggot

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on 12 Sep 2008 at 11:15 pm163Tony Snow

Why, God, Why oh why is josh is a faggot getting away with this?
on 12 Sep 2008 at 11:18 pm164josh is a faggot

because its true!
josh is a faggot
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on 12 Sep 2008 at 11:22 pm165Tony Snow

God hates gay bashing more than He hates people who are gay, and Josh has always been right by Him. Stop Picking on Josh !!!

Proverbs 30:10

Do not slander a servant to his master, or he will curse you, and you will pay for it.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 11:25 pm166josh is a faggot

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on 12 Sep 2008 at 11:57 pm167random guy

tony,

this guys fucking annoying
on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:00 am168Smoggy Batzrubble

Yeah, he’s a boring cunt-face. Too pathetic even to merit a smiting.

SHUT UP and fuck off dickhead
on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:02 am169Anonymous

Dude! Grow the fuck up. How old are you? 12?
on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:02 am170Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Fuck!
on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:08 am171josh is a faggot

why dont you all go screw yourselves

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on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:10 am172josh is a faggot

oh my freakin owner-of-this-blog…

shut the hell up!!!!!!!!!!!
on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:10 am173josh is a faggot

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josh is a faggot
josh is a faggot
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on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:12 am174random guy

is this guy fighting with himself or is he just a mental case?
on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:14 am175random guy

ok everyone, i’m sorry but josh is a faggot has been killed…

cracka, come up with something new
on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:14 am176Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I don’t know, Random. You should be able to answer the question yourself. That’s what I’m thinking anyway, since “josh is a faggot” is your line.
on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:35 am177Flying Spaghetti Monster

fear me god!
i am the symbol of those who believe in…

EVOLUTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:52 am178Unreasonably Angry Triangle

Dear God, will you please give josh is a faggot a good sound smiting? Maybe introduce his rectum to Satan’s massive erection? Thank you Lord. Amen.
on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:56 am179Tony Snow

Or to smoggy’s mass of umbrellas …
on 13 Sep 2008 at 12:58 am180random guy

yes please smite him its been a while since i’ve seen some one get smote
on 13 Sep 2008 at 1:16 am181Tony Snow

guy, you can see wafah get smote here:

http://www.zippyvideos.com/5614222276259836/wafah./
on 13 Sep 2008 at 1:33 am182random guy

think of all the poor little children who saw that and are now scared for life…..

ha!!!!!
on 13 Sep 2008 at 1:59 am183Tony Snow

maybe something a little bit more energetic:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=42klb5HjvBk
on 13 Sep 2008 at 2:45 am184Evangelist Curtis

Nobody ever tells me to shut up ( except Ben, who is an asshole).

Nobody ever “faces” me.

I’m feeling really unloved here, people!

Come on already! I’m the token good fun gay guy. Send some love already!

Jesus.
on 13 Sep 2008 at 2:55 am185American Psycho

shut up, queer.
on 13 Sep 2008 at 2:57 am186Tony Snow

Hah! Psycho is Curtis with fake teeth and glasses!
on 13 Sep 2008 at 3:13 am187Ben

FACE!
…
literally….face
on 13 Sep 2008 at 7:16 pm188Ben

so this is the new site huh? it sucks dick
on 14 Sep 2008 at 12:58 am189Tony Snow

I feels really strange
on 14 Sep 2008 at 2:12 am190Tony Snow

how did Neb get in here
on 14 Sep 2008 at 8:15 pm191Tony Snow

Evangelist Curtis,

Are you related to Cowboy Curtis of PeeWee’s Playhouse?
on 14 Sep 2008 at 8:17 pm192The Confused Cracka

So, I thought God would actually love this lady.
She’s from lilly white Alaska…
She’s a devoted fan of His novel…
And she only kills His most beautiful creatures (because the cute ones taste the best).
What gives God?
Are you going to also smite the assholes who continue to spread lies and poorly shopped pics of her?
on 14 Sep 2008 at 8:17 pm193Bridgette

I agree. The real God loves Sarah Palin as do all good people. She is a strong Christian woman, a devoted mother and very very smart. I can’t wait till she becomes vice-president!!
on 14 Sep 2008 at 8:18 pm194The Confused Cracka

Palin-Giuliani 2012
on 14 Sep 2008 at 8:18 pm195Bridgette

I wish that was the ticket this year!
on 14 Sep 2008 at 8:18 pm196Josh

take it from a dude who live in NYC, Giuliani is an ASSHOLE.

Bridgette how can you love a dude who cheated on his wife and then divorced her and brought his whore into the Mayor’s mansion? hypocrite. oh yeah maybe thats why you like McCain. He left his cripple wife for some young rich meat (it’s the reasons the Reagans didn’t like McCain’s slimy ass anymore)
on 15 Sep 2008 at 4:42 am197Tony Snow

God,

This is getting better every day!
on 18 Sep 2008 at 7:39 am198Tony Snow

Or maybe worse
on 24 Sep 2008 at 7:41 am199Tony Snow

Or maybe just sideways …..
on 27 Sep 2008 at 6:11 am200bea

god,
the more i read of your anger and your exploits in smiting jerks, the more i realize… that i am incredibly turned on by all this. the omnipotence and righteous anger, the power, the hatred, the love of human bloodshed and misery. its all very arousing god. when do i get to have my fill of god? why would you curse me with a vagina and fill me with such desires if you have no intentions of sexin me up proper? i want you god. lets knock devine boots.