Stuff God Hates

Sep 10th, 2008 by God

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0b8ksybWwZc]

Prepare thyself, he who reads this, to tremble and quake before the Incredible Word of God, as written by THE LORD HIMSELF!

I was watching American television last night, looking for blasphemous people and things to judge and smite (as I am wont to do), when I stumbled upon one of the most evil things I have ever seen – the Microsoft commercial that shows Bill Gates buying shoes.

In the six thousand years since I created this Universe, I have seen some truly appalling things; an adorable 3-year-old boy twisted inside out after being pushed onto subway tracks by a jealous rival …the tragic detonation of nuclear weapons on only Nagasaki and Hiroshima…a Nun’s vagina.

And then there is this. I’ve seen every commercial since the inception of television, and I declare this the worst one ever made! This…commercial…is…AN ABOMINATION TO GOD!

First and foremost, it features that malevolent demon Bill Gates, who fights My Divine Will by giving billions and billions of dollars to the Me-forsaken continent of Africa. He does more than any other one person on Earth to help keep Africans alive. PISSES ME OFF!

Secondly, it stars Jerry Seinfeld, who used to be mildly amusing to Me, but who has now obviously become a servant of Satanus.

Microsoft HQ, 2 days from now.

This commercial was in no way enlightening or entertaining. IT SICKENS ME!

The disgusting smugness, the pretentious pomposity, the limitless pride felt by the despicable people of the Microsoft Corporation…made the LORD puke his fucking guts out all over Mary’s stupid face.

STUPID…MICROSOFT…ASSHOLES! THINK…THEY’RE SO…SMART!
And, as if directed by Satanus himself to enrage Me…that gay little butt-shake done by Gates at the end of the commercial…makes Me want to kill every fricking first, second and last-born child on the planet. ARRRGH!

Perhaps My Righteous Rage is compounded by all the trouble I’ve been having with My Windows OS lately, but at any rate, Microsoft will pay for this! Bill Gates will pay for this as well. They will all pay for this! THE SWIFT AND TERRIBLE VENGEANCE OF THE LORD’S MIGHTY SWORD IS UPON YOU NOW.

DIE HEATHEN SCUM!

Tags: Asshole, Bill Gates, God

Posted in People

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290 Responses to “#44 Microsoft”

on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:32 am1Sue Doenimm

Two things:

1) You must not like Bono much, then?
2) I assume that all children born after the second-born and before the last-born are safe, then? How do we count still-births?

By the way -
Thanks, God. I really appreciate what you do.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:58 am2Lucifer

Die, Sue Doenimminin, die!

God, why do you hate churros?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:59 am3Lucifer

When I rule the world, everyone will have free churros all the time, breakfast, lunch and dinner.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:47 am4Tony Snow

God,

This might help: http://www.killbillgates.com/
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:00 am5Tony Snow

There’s a lot of the killbill sentiment out there …

http://killbillgatesbetter.ytmnd.com/

http://toastytech.com/evil/killbill.html

http://www.freakingnews.com/Goodbye-Bill-Gates-Pictures–2010-0.asp
on 10 Sep 2008 at 12:04 pm6uppity cracka

nun’s vagina has been the direct cause of more birth defects and melted skin than nuclear fallout. but, i’d still dose her with date rape drugs.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 12:24 pm7Yo Yo Ma Ma

I’d dose myself with date rape drugs.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 12:30 pm8Yo Yo Ma Ma

Lucifer, what if I don’t want free churros all the time, breakfast, lunch and dinner?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 12:47 pm9smoggy batzrubble

Then you’ll certainly get them…

…probably shoved up your butt while you’re comatose, by a large demon with a date rape kit.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 12:55 pm10Yo Yo Ma Ma

Hey smoggy, what time is it in NZ? Are you getting up or going to bed? Or are you somewhere else.

A churro enema sounds like Hell.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 12:56 pm11uppity cracka

i wonder how God plans on smiting bill gates? date rape style?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 12:57 pm12uppity cracka

nevermind, according to the caption, he plans on exposing microsoft HQ to a sudden burst of nun’s vaginal discharge.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 1:16 pm13Zeus

Gates also gives tons of money to cancer research. Thus, one more reason for his quick and decisive smiting.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 1:22 pm14uppity cracka

God gives kids cancer because he hates them. who is this bill gates character to get in the way of God’s Divine Will? i’m filled with righteous anger now!!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 1:26 pm15smoggy batzrubble

Ummm … it’s 1.18 am in NZ, Yo Mama. I was about to go to bed when an angel called to tell me that God had a new message.

cracka - “a sudden burst of nun’s vaginal discharge”–is that’s what’s known as a sticky situation?

Hey Zoose–did you see in the ad that Sinnerfeld said Gates had a JUPITER sized brain. He’s in cahoots with your Roman alter-ego!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 1:39 pm16Zeus

I found that incredibly insulting. No mortal could possibly have a brain as large as mine…especially some nit wit who invented that crap shack called an “operating system.”
on 10 Sep 2008 at 1:39 pm17smoggy batzrubble

buggr too tirrd to rite coherentelely

–time for bed with latex lucy
on 10 Sep 2008 at 1:43 pm18smoggy batzrubble

Oh wait — one last question God. Is it true that you gave Bill Gates aspergers?

If you have you could smite him by removing it and giving him a normal brain so that he can comprehend the full horror of what he’s unleashed on the earth.

That knowledge should drive him to madness and self-loathing.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 1:55 pm19CrookedHalo

God, move to Canada. With Canadian simulcast regulations, you won’t see that commercial. Just think of what fun you can have during the Superbowl by missing all the commercials!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:04 pm20Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I hate this commercial too, God. They ruin NFL games by running this commercial at almost every commercial break.

God, I have a question for You about Your Divine Vomit… is it considered a blessing to be vomited on by God?

Talk about your irony though… my sis used to clean the house of Bill and Melinda Gates(Melinda’s a bitch). I tried to break in on one of her cleaning shifts to dispatch that demon, Bill Gates, but unfortunately, they used a lot of technology in that fucking house and I was detected the moment I set foot on the property. I was chased by his pack of technologically advanced demon-dogs and just barely escaped with my vagina intact!
.
.
.
God, are You having issues with XP?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:13 pm21Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Just curious, God… is that James Bulger You’re talking about?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:17 pm22Yo Yo Ma Ma

It’s 10:17, Real Coast Time.

God punished Bill Gates by giving him a bad haircut.

You’d think, with XX billions to his name, Bill could afford to go to some place other than SuperCuts.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:18 pm23Josh

commercials ruin the superbowl? No way, the commercials used to be the best part. Now the commericals suck, but there was a time when they were the best. Remember the one with Michael Jordan playing “undergournd” basketball with that huge fake wig? Steve Martin was doing an investigation on a new playgournd champ who he thought was MJ!!! Classic. Now it’s a bunch of fake ass donkeys who want to work for a shitty beer company.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:24 pm24CrookedHalo

Josh, unless you’re a Canadian who gets US timeshift channels or live close to the US border and can pick up US stations, Canadians don’t see the cool Superbowl commercials. The broadcast rules are that if both a US and Canadian network show the same show at the same time, Canadian commercials are inserted.

I’ve only seen the Gates/Seinfeld commercial once - during Sunday’s ‘Mad Men’ episode.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:28 pm25Lucifer

YOU’LL EAT MY CHURROS AND LIKE IT, DAMN YOU!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:31 pm26Yo Yo Ma Ma

Hurfff…no thanks, I’m full.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:31 pm27uppity cracka

somebody PLEASE say something funny. jew?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:32 pm28Yo Yo Ma Ma

Wait, Lucifer, will you supply chocolate dip, too?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:33 pm29Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Is ‘churro’ code for Lucifer’s penis?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:33 pm30Yo Yo Ma Ma

…or were you talking about churro sheep?

Either way, I’m in.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:34 pm31Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Josh,

I like the E-Trade baby… if memory serves, that commercial premiered during the last Superbowl.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:37 pm32Captain Kirk

Klingon son! You killed my bastard! Wait! I mean…
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:37 pm33Josh

Nun,
he rented a fucking clown!!! That was comedy.
But I still hate that damn donkey.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:37 pm34CrookedHalo

Lucifer, you may wish to consider being a more blue shade of red. The yellowy red just doesn’t do it for you.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:40 pm35Yo Yo Ma Ma

On the way to work, a seven-foot specter of evil appeared in front of the car, so I ran over it. Sounded like a bag of laundry going under. Hope I didn’t hurt the tires.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:40 pm36Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Josh,

I know!! I love Bobo and him underestimating the creepiness. Have you seen the new one where he’s got some girl sending him texts?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:41 pm37Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Yo,

You ran over Larry Byrd?? Why, Yo?? Why????
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:42 pm38Yo Yo Ma Ma

Nun, sometimes you just gotta say ‘what the heck’.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:43 pm39Nun Ur Damned Bizness

He does have really bad hair. And he is evil. I suppose that in the end, you did a good thing for mankind.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:45 pm40Yo Yo Ma Ma

Nun, you possess a mind not merely twisted, but actually sprained.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:47 pm41Yo Yo Ma Ma

I can sympathize with God, I’m having issues with my PC. The hard drive is almost full, and I’ve run out of flash drives.

I’m not sure what to do now. Anyone got any ideas?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:47 pm42Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I blame my Southern Baptist upbringing.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:48 pm43Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Buy a new PC. That’s what I did when I purchased Sims 2 and realized that my antiquated piece of shit couldn’t even play the fucking game.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:50 pm44Yo Yo Ma Ma

Nun, are you a recovering Baptist?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:52 pm45uppity cracka

sarah palin.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:52 pm46Nun Ur Damned Bizness

How does one recover from such horror, Yo?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:53 pm47Yo Yo Ma Ma

Nun, it’s a newish PC, 100Gb hard drive, so I don’t want to get rid of it yet. But the drive is filling up.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:54 pm48Yo Yo Ma Ma

cracka, what did you mean by post #45?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:56 pm49uppity cracka

this shit isn’t funny today. i thought i’d throw some fodder at everyone in hopes of awakening the hate in us all.

someone needs to get faced or smited soon.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 2:58 pm50Yo Yo Ma Ma

Welll… if it isn’t funny, help me with my hard drive problem.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:04 pm51Zeus

Grrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!. Sarah Palin IS a pig with lipstick! Even if that’s not what Obama meant it’s what she is. No wait pigs are too smart. She’s a hairless mutated Guinea Pig with lipstick! There, is that better?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:04 pm52uppity cracka

nun’s vagina.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:05 pm53Yo Yo Ma Ma

‘Las Piranha’ is an anagram of ‘Sarah Palin’.

Also, ‘Hi Anal rasp’.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:06 pm54Zeus

Yo Yo,

Buy an large capicity external Hard Drive at some inexpensive place on line like Egghead.com. Move large files like pictures, porn, and music to the external hard drive. Add memory to you CPU by purchasing more. It is easy to install.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:06 pm55Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Have you thought about another external hard-drive, Yo?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:06 pm56uppity cracka

hairless guinea pig slut!!

nun, does your vagina have a 5 o’clock shadow yet? do you need to keep a norelco handy to trim your cunt whiskers after lunch…what do you feed your slophole for lunch?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:09 pm57Yo Yo Ma Ma

Zeus, got it ordered: http://www.amazon.com/Western-Digital-Passport-Essential-Portable/dp/B0012GQZZU/ref=tpi_image_12?ie=UTF8&pf%5Frd%5Ft=101&pf%5Frd%5Fm=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf%5Frd%5Fp=435449501&pf%5Frd%5Fs=center-2&pf%5Frd%5Fr=1TW1EVNQMQ0A0ZTX5NKB&pf%5Frd%5Fi=193870011

Ultra easy, and thanks!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:15 pm58Yo Yo Ma Ma

Easy down cracka.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:17 pm59Josh

Zoosy,
You can get a 500gb hard drive for $119, check out bestbuy.com.

I think it will be hard for Joltin Joe to debate Palin because no matter what anyone says the GOP is painting it as a sexist attack or an attack on her family. I really hate that bitch, and not just because she cut funding for sex ed, btu because she is a bitch.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:18 pm60Josh

Yo,
I thought it was “take it easy” or “Settle down”
“easy down”? is that some code you an Nun worked on.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:26 pm61uppity cracka

shit. motherfucker. fuck.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:26 pm62Yo Yo Ma Ma

Dunno…I used to work construction…whoever was directing the crane operator used the phrase on occassion.

Also, ‘Boom Up!’, which sounds like some code Nun and I worked on!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:27 pm63Yo Yo Ma Ma

cracka, who pissed in your coffee today?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:28 pm64Josh

Oh that easy down, I’ve heard that before on site. it also applies to Nun.

I know “boom in” and “boom out” from working on shitty movies, which also apply to Nun.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:28 pm65Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Cracka’s penis.

Is that funny enough for you, Cracka?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:30 pm66Yo Yo Ma Ma

Short joke.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:30 pm67uppity cracka

the world, yo. the whole stupid place. i’m in the mood for some smiting of biblical proportions.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:30 pm68Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I’ll have you know that all my movies are high-quality and not shitty at all!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:31 pm69uppity cracka

that’s hilarious, nun. my penis…that’s more like it.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:31 pm70Yo Yo Ma Ma

Josh, I have a neice who works for the production company for a TV show. Oddly enough, she never watched TV as a child (when their old set broke, her Dad never replaced it.)
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:34 pm71Yo Yo Ma Ma

cracka, I was the Best Man at a nudist wedding. I wasn’t in the ceremony, but I was still Best Man. (old joke)
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:40 pm72uppity cracka

DIE HEATHEN SCUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!!!

that’s it. josh is dead.

again.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:41 pm73Yo Yo Ma Ma

cracka, set down the crack pipe. What did Josh do?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:46 pm74uppity cracka

nuttin.

i’m just going to kill him, that’s all.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:52 pm75Josh

bring it whitey!
You low class mexican with a puerto rican flag wrapped around your 8 kids.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:53 pm76Josh

yo yo,
I have some cousins who’s parents don’t let them watch TV, and they are home schooled. Those kids are fucking dorks. I feel bad for them the first time they get an email claiming they won a prize in Nigeria, they will believe it.

PS Fuck Cracka.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 3:54 pm77Yo Yo Ma Ma

OK cracka…
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:01 pm78Yo Yo Ma Ma

Heh, her Dad had no objections to her watching TV elsewhere, but didn’t want her to waste her time in his house. She graduated top of her class, and got a scolarship to college.

Whenever she’s in a production meeting, some actor will be introduced. Everyone else will be groveling. She’s unimpressed, having never seen them before!

She’s promised to let me be in a crowd scene, if I ever get over to Hollywood during production.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:01 pm79Yo Yo Ma Ma

‘Fuck Cracka’?? sounds like a call for Nun!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:02 pm80Nun Ur Damned Bizness

If Josh works on shitty movies, what are the chances that he’s Eddie Murphy or Nicolas Cage? Stop, Eddie/Nic!! Just stop.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:02 pm81Yo Yo Ma Ma

I do know some home schooled kids, their text books describe how God created the Grand Canyon, and placed the fossils in the strata. I fear for these kids.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:03 pm82Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Can you share which show it is, Yo?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:03 pm83A Pharisee

god,
i must say that this is the best post ever.
after you toast microsoft hq, will ad agencies get a hefty smiting too?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:06 pm84uppity cracka

watch yourself, josh is gay, after wiping out all the hipster joshes in billyburg i hopped on the BQE down towards prospect park spraying bullets at joshes and non-joshes alike. any stuck up pretentious show biz type expectant fathers are eating it…HARD! whether they are named josh or not. all the way to queens. joshes everywhere will DIE!!!!!!!!!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:06 pm85Josh

Hey Nun,
Screw you! Bangkok Dangerous opened number 1!!! (No it’s not a biography of Majic Johnson)

Where’s my uncle I need more movies rolls.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:08 pm86Josh

yo yo,
my uncle is an atheist, so the books him and his wfie use are all about science and math much to God’s dismay.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:08 pm87Josh

MAGIC, not Majic, mother fucker!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:09 pm88Nun Ur Damned Bizness

You’re right, Josh. It did open at number one… in one of the most dismal weekends in film-premiere history. Way to go, Nic!! By the way, you’re not Elvis.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:11 pm89Josh

I’m no Elvis (even with my hair plugs), but my son is cool. I named him Kal-El!!!! I know that was gay, but come on! Fucking Kal-El!

Cracka,
Cut the chit chat a-hole.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:12 pm90Nun Ur Damned Bizness

God,

Please smite the mother-fucker in my office that installs things willy-nilly on his harddrive with no thought whatsoever to the consequences.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:13 pm91Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Yes, you named your son a dork name for which he’ll be teased mercilessly. He’ll also be teased mercilessly for being your son. Once again, way to go, Nic!!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:13 pm92uppity cracka

are you dead yet, josh?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:15 pm93uppity cracka

con

grat

ulations, i guess?

i’ve never congratulated someone i’ve never met on anything. it’s weird. maybe i’m done trying to kill you for today.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:17 pm94Josh

much like my movies, I die and come back (on DVD).

speaking of, can you guys please rent “next” I threw in some jessica biel for eye candy. I’m not goign to ask you to rent National Treasure as even I dont watch that shit. but a paycheck is a paycheck and these hair plugs don’t pay for themselves.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:19 pm95Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I actually liked National Treasure. He was better off when he was buds with Sean Penn.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:19 pm96Zeus

Yo Yo, can you cancel that order? Here is a 500 Gig for $80: http://www.newegg.com/Product/Product.aspx?Item=N82E16822204078

Sorry should have just provided the link.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:21 pm97uppity cracka

i saw next. it sucked. if you had anything to do with that i’m going back on my josh murder binge.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:21 pm98Zeus

Kal-El…?? Sounds damn Un-Amurrrcan! Like some sort terrorist name. Shoot, ga-dang it. No a Biblical name. No siree!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:23 pm99Zeus

National Treasure was awesome! Next was so-so.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:23 pm100Josh

Nun,
Natonal Treasure was a cluster fuck that had to be blessed by either God or Satan to get green lit.
The plot made no logical sense. The second one was even worse.
A dude working on his own can kidnap the Pres of the US, and then the PResident has “no power” to tell the secret service not to go after him? STFU hollywood.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:25 pm101Josh

in all seriousness, Nic Cage is on my list of Hollywood douches to punch in the face. Number one on that list is Brett Rattner for the bile that is X3.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:30 pm102Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I haven’t seen National Treasure 2, Josh. I have no plans to either but I still say National Treasure was a pretty good flick.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:37 pm103Zeus

Nat. Treasure 2 was doche on a roll but the first was kicked ass. Or maybe it was becaue I saw it after consuming large amounts of Thanksgiving turkey?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:40 pm104Ben

great post God. that commercial blows…I would say that the war between Mac and PC is over. Mac won!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:46 pm105Zeus

Josh, why do you hate Nic Cage…I mean besides Bangkok Dangerous, Nat. Treasure, Ghost Rider, The Weather Man, Gone in Sixty Seconds? Wait, Lord of War and Windtalkers were good?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:49 pm106Yo Yo Ma Ma

Zeus, dang - I’m cancelling - yours is a better deal!

Nun said: “Please smite the mother-fucker in my office that installs things willy-nilly on his harddrive with no thought whatsoever to the consequences.”

Nun, do you work in IT? Who installed what?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:50 pm107Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Zeus,

Ghost Rider and The Wicker Man were pure, unadulterated crap.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:50 pm108Josh

The only reason I have not gone after Cage (gay name also after a comic book character) is because of his work on Raising Arizona. He’s in the biz because of who his family is, not because of talent.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:52 pm109Zeus

Sarcasm Nun, sarcasm.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:52 pm110Zeus

Raising Arizona was awesome. Let’s not forget those classics Firebirds and Vampire Kiss. Those were great.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:53 pm111Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Yo,

No, I am not in IT but unfortunately, I am the most knowledgable person in the office when it comes to PC related issues so when something happens, I call the IT guy and he tells me what to do.

Bonehead installed updates without checking to see what he was updating and completely froze up his machine. No log in screen, nothing. Had to open in safe mode and undo everything he’d done since yesterday. Sad thing is, I think it was the Windows Security update.

God damn you, Bill Gates!! God damn you!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:53 pm112Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Sorry, Zeus. My bad.

Raising Arizona is a great film though.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:55 pm113Yo Yo Ma Ma

My neice works for the company that produces ‘Brothers and Sisters’.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:57 pm114Yo Yo Ma Ma

She also worked on ‘Alias’, and got signed photos of Jennifer Garner for some of her tennaged boy cousins. They were treated like gods at their school!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:58 pm115Yo Yo Ma Ma

Yeah, all the XP PCs here had an update during the night and rebooted, no troubles to report, thank God.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 4:59 pm116Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Jennifer Garner seems like a really sweet woman… I hate her.

Brothers and Sisters eh? Does she know that man-whore, Balthazar Getty? Dude. Seriously, where is people’s taste? Sienna Fucking Miller!?! She’s a skanky ho who probably has herpes all over her lips.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:00 pm117Nun Ur Damned Bizness

He was the only one who had an issue. He had some kind of HP update that I had to remove as well, it might have been that.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:02 pm118Yo Yo Ma Ma

Heh, she has to herd the actors/actresses to their respective studios/shots/whatever you call it, and thinks they are all sheep.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:04 pm119Yo Yo Ma Ma

Ugh, HP…I dislike them with the intensity of three full moons.

Dell, or more specifically, their ‘help center’, gets a 20-megaton blast of hate!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:04 pm120Nun Ur Damned Bizness

She’s right. Most of them are sheep.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:05 pm121Nun Ur Damned Bizness

You need to take some lessons from God on how to hate, Yo. Disliking with the intensity of three full moons is nothing. Hell, you might as well take them out for dinner and give them a kiss goodnight. That’s how weak your ‘dislike’ is.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:08 pm122Yo Yo Ma Ma

Meh, HP is low on my dislike list - Dell has the top three spots!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:10 pm123Zeus

No, Sienna Miller, after playing Edie Sedgwick she moved to the awesome category.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:14 pm124Nun Ur Damned Bizness

So, has anybody noticed that whenever one of us questions why God isn’t here at a particular moment, God shows up right after that and posts? It’s like God really does watch our every movement. God probably watches us all masturbate and fuck. I wonder if dead relatives do that too? I’d be really creeped out if my dead racist grandpa watched me masturbate with my big, black dildo.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:16 pm125Yo Yo Ma Ma

My uncle would probably hand me a box of tissues and a tube of KY. “Go to it, kiddo. Have fun. I’ll be next door at the cheerleader tryouts.”
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:17 pm126Nun Ur Damned Bizness

And that’s just what an uncle should do, Yo.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:18 pm127uppity cracka

nun, nun, nun.

when i finally get around to writing my memoirs that shit’s definitely going to be in there.

oh, shut up, benjamin.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:23 pm128Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I wouldn’t put your scat fetish in your memoirs, Cracka. It’s all up to you in the end but who’s your target audience?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:23 pm129Josh

sienna miller sucks, and factory girl was a piece of shit.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:32 pm130uppity cracka

my target audience is scat fetishists.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:32 pm131uppity cracka

and whorish nuns.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:34 pm132Zeus

“sienna miller sucks, and factory girl was a piece of shit.”

This coming from the guy who is pushing Next on us.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:36 pm133Josh

Sarcasm Zoosy, sarcasm.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:36 pm134Zeus

Oh, I knew that.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:37 pm135Josh

and by sarcasm I meant both Next and Factory Girl suck ass.

check out: http://womenagainstsarahpalin.blogspot.com/
I guess al vagina’s aren’t stupid
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:41 pm136Zeus

God,

Are you going to Smite the Large Hadron Collider and all the scientists that created it? Perhpas you could throw in Swizerland and France for funding it and allowing it to be built on their soil. After all, they are looking for the “God particle.” This smacks of sacrilage. I suggest a rather large Black Hole to swallow both countrries and crush them with the force of infinite mass.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:41 pm137Zeus

I knew Al Vagina. Hell of a guy.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:42 pm138uppity cracka

those stupid twat-bags. i hope their anal glands fill with scat.

SCAT!!!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:44 pm139uppity cracka

Al Vagina? friend of yours? i heard he once wrestled a dozen elephants with one vagina tied behind his back.

scat.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:50 pm140Zeus

Oh, the whole Vagina family is great. There is Al Vagina, his wife, Bella Vagina and the little squirt, Harry Vagina. They make an excellent fish dinner.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:51 pm141Josh

yeah yeah yeah, I made a typo.

but chekc out my new avatar!!!! I pity the fool.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:51 pm142Josh

CHECK out my new avatar! FUCK
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:51 pm143First time -Long time

Josh is a Faggot!?

-Spread It-
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:52 pm144Ben

hahaha. he sure is.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:52 pm145Zeus

That’s okay Josh. I don’t think Mr. T can spell either.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:55 pm146uppity cracka

josh isn’t just a member, either…he’s like the gay club for men president. he presides over dicks in butts.

ben, fuck, shut up.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:56 pm147random guy

josh is a faggot.

he insults mr.t with his faggy-ness
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:58 pm148The Very Incredibly Unpleasant Jew

which do you think josh would be? the dick or the butt?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:59 pm149Josh

Jesus Homo Christ,

The day was going so well without Random Douche

Uppity,
Still angry that no matter how hard he tries he’ll always be a filthy border jumper.

Random,
He just wishes he was funny. So lame he has to try to insult me by calling me a faggot when really he wants me to just say I am so he can ask me to give him a rusty trombone and a dirty sanchez.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 5:59 pm150random guy

vagina
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:01 pm151uppity cracka

dick butkus.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:02 pm152uppity cracka

his penis is an inside out butt.
his butt is an inside out penis.

i reread this. decided it was too stupid to submit. yet, i am still going to do it.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:03 pm153uppity cracka

now, back to sarah palin.

cunt.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:04 pm154Ben

hahaha. dick butkus. his middle name was ‘inthe’. tee-hee! me funny.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:06 pm155The Very Incredibly Unpleasant Jew

shut up, ben.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:06 pm156random guy

ben,

what are you smoking?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:07 pm157The Very Incredibly Unpleasant Jew

uppity, you’re on a roll today. i’m unneeded here.

unless josh gets all faggoty and no one tells him. then i’ll jump in.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:07 pm158Ben

RG - cracka. tee-hee!

You know who i hate? der. dude. what an asshole.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:08 pm159random guy

josh is a faggot

unpleasant jew,

i think we got that covered
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:09 pm160Ben

geez…make us a new rule to live by jew. they should call you Rulesy McGee.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:10 pm161random guy

josh is a faggot
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:11 pm162Josh

no random I will not take a shit on your chest! you god damn homo!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:11 pm163random guy

josh the faggot,

your a faggot
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:13 pm164uppity cracka

what about his “a faggot”?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:24 pm165Josh

the thing is I live in NYC and I work with and am friends with a bunch of “faggots” and I don’t see anything wrong with it, you do your business and I do mine.

calling me a faggot really isn’t an insult to me as much as it shows your idiocy Ran-dumb.

come up with something actually funny.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:27 pm166random guy

josh is a faggot

….

oh my gosh!!! that was so fucking funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:31 pm167Ben

random, josh, you two sure are lucky to have each other….. I wish that fucking cock-smoker der dude was here for me to fight with.

on a more serius note: random, can you please be more random? you’re getting kind of, oh whats the word….predictable.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:31 pm168Josh

zzzzzzzz
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:40 pm169Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Ben said: “dick butkus. his middle name was ‘inthe’. tee-hee! me funny.”

I’ll admit it, I giggled at this. I don’t know what’s funnier; Ben’s play Butkus’ name or the ‘tee hee! me funny’ remark.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:43 pm170The Very Incredibly Unpleasant Jew

Nun Ur Damned Shut Up.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:50 pm171Nun Ur Damned Bizness

This coming from somebody who titled a facebook page to let everybody know he’s a homo. Shut the fuck up, Jay.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:53 pm172uppity cracka

what’s not offensive about calling some bloak a bundle of sticks, city boy? i bet josh has a purdy mouth.

random guy. wait a minute, isn’t that nun’s boyfriends name? she’s always talking about sleeping with this dude. for some reason i thought he’d be, you know, witty.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:54 pm173The Very Incredibly Unpleasant Jew

jay will be very upset to hear you’re accusing me of being him.

now shut up and say something slutty. that’s your gimmick, right?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:54 pm174Ben

FACE!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:56 pm175uppity cracka

ooooooooooooooooooooooooh.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:57 pm176Josh

you would say I have a pretty mouth much like you think Random’s ass tastes nice.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dc6YHt80KGI

Cracka, tell us how Random’s ass tastes!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:57 pm177Tony Snow

Press Briefing by Tony Snow
The White Palace Lawn

2:45 p.m. EDT

Good Afternoon. Today I have a special announcement. As of just a few moments ago, the infamous hate/flame-site Stuff God Hates achieved a major milestone - over 250,000 on the hit-o-meter! Congratulations, God.

And to all the regular gang …SHUT UP!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 6:57 pm178Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Oh… I get it, unassimilated multiple. Yes, best Jay thinks you’re someone different so he doesn’t try to kill himself.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:00 pm179random guy

any one have any pie? i’m hungry
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:03 pm180Tony Snow

Get some Nuts!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NySN_plfiNI&NR=1
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:14 pm181uppity cracka

i declare today date rape day. josh, what is your rectum doing later?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:18 pm182Sue Doenimm

You die, Lucy.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:20 pm183Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Be afraid, Josh. Be very afraid.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:26 pm184uppity cracka

i’m asking for nun. she’s shy sometimes.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:31 pm185Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I don’t know… Josh knows people who knows people. I don’t think I should date-rape Josh. I might have use for him at some future date.

How many people think the reports that Palin is popular with white females is media spin? I’ve yet to find a white woman that feels that way. Most seem to see her for what she is… a fucking cunt.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:37 pm186Josh

Cracka,
Sorry I can’t do rape today. Today is actually “Josh fights off gay ass cracka and homo Random guy before they put his testicles in their mouths” day
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:37 pm187CrookedHalo

She isn’t popular with me and is not a substitute for Hilary. It might just be a way to spin her as a person who will pick up undecided female voters. Mainly the disgruntled Dems or Republicans.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:38 pm188CrookedHalo

Josh, I just ate lunch.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:39 pm189random guy

why doesn’t any one have any fucking pie?!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:39 pm190Smoggy Batzrubble

Perhaps Palin appeals to the constituency of white women who are really fluid-sucking alien lizard vampire’s feeding off the night-spilt sperm of naive boys who believe the abstinence crap.

Josh the faggot is an anagram for “hejo got shaft”–what does it mean God?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:40 pm191Yo Yo Ma Ma

” fucking cunt” Aren’t they all? (Present vaginas excepted)
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:40 pm192Yo Yo Ma Ma

Smoggy! You must be a light sleeper.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:40 pm193random guy

i want pie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
….
or cake, cake is good…
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:41 pm194Yo Yo Ma Ma

Here’s a nice comic to promote US-NZ friendship: http://www.dieselsweeties.com/archive/2096
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:44 pm195uppity cracka

josh. that’s not a day. you can’t just make up days.

yoyo-you mean we will pretend to be their friends until they fall asleep and then we…well, you get the idea.

i know lots of white women. and they are mostly dumb.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:46 pm196Smoggy Batzrubble

I’m a sound sleeper Nun–it’s that bloody angel Gabriel, keeps waking me up. I think he’s trying to find a Southern hemisphere virgin to impregnate. Only virgin in my house is the dog … who is getting fatter come to think of it.

Here’s the NZ take on McCain and Palin:

http://www.stuff.co.nz/images/images/755429.jpg?w=460&h=322
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:47 pm197Yo Yo Ma Ma

Heh, strewth, cracka. Why do women fake orgasms? Because they think we care.

Why should I care if my wife fakes orgasms? I’m faking the whole relationship!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:48 pm198Smoggy Batzrubble

Sorry Yo Mama, not sure why I called you Nun. You must both type alike…
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:49 pm199The saint formerly known as "Pádraig"

Isn’t William Gates an atheist? Clearly a worshiper of Shátain and a believer in the doctrines of science.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:50 pm200Smoggy Batzrubble

Oops–think I’ll go back to bed. Something weird and American happened to that link.

Try again:
http://www.stuff.co.nz/730988a17218.html
on 10 Sep 2008 at 7:53 pm201random guy

pie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!111111111!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!one!!!!!1111

josh is a faggot
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:01 pm202Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Why do women fake orgasms? It’s a waste of time… unless the guy actually cares if the woman has an orgasm but is completely ineffectual at bringing a woman to orgasm.

Random,

Find a female… they all have pie. Some of it is tasty, some not. It’s a crap-shoot.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:02 pm203Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Yo Yo said: “” fucking cunt” Aren’t they all? (Present vaginas excepted)”

Thanks, Yo. All kidding aside, I actually hate the word “cunt”.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:02 pm204Yo Yo Ma Ma

Lol, good one, Smoggy!

Pay no attention to our madness, we all think we’re a bit of a dag - we’re all mad as a meat axe! If you ever go OE and get to Maine, drive north of the big smoke to my bach, it’s in the wop-wops. You can go bush (not George!) or go to the flicks. Mind the bridge when you cross the creek, it’s a bit dodgy. Watch out for the anklebiters and Bitser. We’ll have a piss up with the rellies, or off the pub, lunch is my shout. If Nun shows up, drop your gear in the dunny and root, or just yack if she’s not randy.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:03 pm205Yo Yo Ma Ma

Nun, if it’s a crap-shoot, roll her over!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:03 pm206Nun Ur Damned Bizness

“If Nun shows up, drop your gear in the dunny and root, or just yack if she’s not randy.”
Silly Yo. Like Nun is ever not randy.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:04 pm207Yo Yo Ma Ma

heh, strewth, that. What was I thinking?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:04 pm208Nun Ur Damned Bizness

No, Yo… that’s Cracka’s thing. Nun don’t play with scat or watersports. Yuck, that’s what Nun says. Yuck.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:05 pm209Yo Yo Ma Ma

Hershey Highway is One Way Only.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:05 pm210Josh

there is a girl at my job who is voting mccain/palin because of palin’s vagina.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:06 pm211Yo Yo Ma Ma

Josh, take her out into the alley and beat the crap out of her so her vote won’t pollute the system. Then steal all her money and squander it on a nice treat for yourself.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:06 pm212Ben

Nun, you don’t like the word cunt?!?! what the fuck! in God’s name, why?? what’s wrong with it? it’s a gorgimous word!

it offends you? how could anything offend you at this point??
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:07 pm213random guy

how about a cresant? they make pretty good ones in paris…
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:07 pm214Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Out of 22 countries polled(none being the US of A), not one of them wants the McCain ticket to win. I say we take the vote away from the stupid, ignorant American sheeple and let the rest of the fucking world vote for in the US Presidential campaign.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:09 pm215Ben

really Josh? holy fuck. what an idiot. where do you work?

also…please when referring to palin’s cunt please call it something insulting like her smelly diseased cunt.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:09 pm216Nun Ur Damned Bizness

It doesn’t offend me, Ben. As you can probably already guess, it’s damned hard to offend me. I just don’t particularly care for the word.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:09 pm217Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Josh,

Give her to me. I’ll take care of the stupid, ignorant vagina-cunt.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:09 pm218Yo Yo Ma Ma

Right on, Nun!

I still wish we hadn’t won the Rebellion. I’d be the twelvth Duke of Sandy Bottom, putting on my pinks and getting ready to ride with the hounds. Tan-tivity! Yoiks!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:10 pm219Nun Ur Damned Bizness

I don’t know what a “cresant” is, Random. Sorry.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:10 pm220Yo Yo Ma Ma

Croisant?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:11 pm221uppity cracka

i wouldn’t worry about that cunt’s (no offense) vote, josh. you don’t exactly live in a battleground state. florida. ohio. pennsylvania. that’s where we need to focus our smite rage.

i think i’m going to kill random guy now. it’s much easier to kill random guys than specific guys named josh who live in brooklyn and want to be big and important someday.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:14 pm222Nun Ur Damned Bizness

We didn’t win the Rebellion, Yo. Americans just wrote history to make it look that way. In reality, the British were fucked up on Opium and forgot why they even came to the North American continent. They picked up some sweet, sweet chiba from the Indians and went home. Very anti-climactic, isn’t it?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:16 pm223uppity cracka

i’m going home to get drunk now. i’m going to spiritualized at first ave tonight. that’s the club famous for being formerly owned by the artist formerly known as prince. anyway, the bathroom is ankle deep piss and vomit…so that’s nice. fits my scat fetish pretty well.

FUCK YOU, YOU FUCKING FUCKs!!!!

death to whitey!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:16 pm224Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Josh is important, Cracka!! And how dare you imply otherwise. Why, I oughta
See, what I’m doing for you, Josh? See how I protect you and watch out for your best interests? You remember me when you finally meet Jon Stewart. Capiche?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:16 pm225Smoggy Batzrubble

“I say we take the vote away from the stupid, ignorant American sheeple and let the rest of the fucking world vote for in the US Presidential campaign.”

Nun–what a great idea! Wish I’d thought of it… Let’s meet up and discuss the details in Yo Mama’s dunny.

(Thanks for the friendly post Yo Mama–even though I didn’t understand most of it?)
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:18 pm226Yo Yo Ma Ma

Wha-a? I got all those terms from the Official NZ Slang Web Page!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:19 pm227Josh

whats even worse is until today she was not even registered to vote. she registered after the other women here jumped on palain for well, for all her anti-woman stance on the issues.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:21 pm228Nun Ur Damned Bizness

She’s a stupid cunt, Josh and you should direct me to her. She won’t be voting once I cut off her fingers and shove them up her stinky snatch. Then I’ll cut out her tongue because tongues are wasted on most women anyway. Yap, yap, yap… they’re worse than small, yippy dogs.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:26 pm229Zeus

This speaks mounds on its own. Please note: 17, 19, 20, 22, 23 were all very close elections. http://chrisevans3d.com/files/iq.htm
Stupid people should not be allowed to vote.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:39 pm230Smoggy Batzrubble

Ha! Gotcha Yo Mama! I new you’d been to the kiwi slang page..my rellies helped write it.

Here’s some Fred Dagg for ya:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PBzOuPCusLE&feature=related
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:42 pm231Yo Yo Ma Ma

LOL! I admit, I googled New Zeland Slang.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:50 pm232Nun Ur Damned Bizness

All great nations fall. If McCain is elected then I think it will be the beginning of the end for the U.S., if Bush isn’t already the beginning of the end which is a pretty good possibility. Who knows, it might not even come down to who had the most votes, God knows the last two elections didn’t come down to that. Diebold might already have McCain declared a winner.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:50 pm233Yo Yo Ma Ma

Funny video.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 8:58 pm234Smoggy Batzrubble

This one’s not so funny:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdJUCU1UH2w
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:08 pm235random guy

I *josh is a faggot* want some *josh is a retard*
pie!!!!!!!!!1111!!!!!!!!!!!!!111!!!11!!!!!!!!!!!one!!!!!!!!!1eleven
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:15 pm236Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Random,

Are you bored and craving attention today or did you sustain a head injury?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:17 pm237Tony Snow

Smoggy,

Kiwi slang is cool … especially the fanny bit.

So, rattle your dags at sparrow fart and give your ferret a run.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:19 pm238Ben

HA-HA! Tony Snow became a green beatnik scat poem artist.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:24 pm239Tony Snow

Ben,

I finally have time to play today, but my gravatar is kind of pushy. Thought i’d try on a more user-friendly talking head.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:27 pm240Tony Snow

Nun,

Perhaps if we say fanny instead of c*%# you won’t take offense?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:28 pm241Smoggy Batzrubble

The slang is part of it–the accent is the other. See if you can pick up what the great Maori comedian Billy T. James is saying?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gRxdaMU2cPU
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:30 pm242Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Tony,

If you use the word ‘fanny’ then I will point at you and laugh.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:31 pm243...loveMaegan

i hate it too …but I kinda like it. I know.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:32 pm244Ben

Tony - your avatar is pushy? huh? me confuse-ed.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:36 pm245Tony Snow

Ben,

My gravatar is pushy.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:36 pm246Tony Snow

My wavatar is a seasick stop sign
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:37 pm247Ben

LOL
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:40 pm248Smoggy Batzrubble

Hey Maegan…you’re back! It’s ages since we insulted you–we thought you must have run from the room weeping.

Maybe you’re not such a tight fanny after all!

FACE
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:41 pm249random guy

hey guys, can anyone tell me why there is a metal rod in my head?

…..?
…-O—
…./l\
…./\
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:42 pm250Ben

dude smoggy….not cool….you can’t FACE the awesomeness of your own comment. if it’s truly a sick burn, somebody will FACE for you.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:44 pm251Smoggy Batzrubble

Yeah i know … I remembered …then I forgot …then I remembered …then I …oh fuck it.

The face thing is too much for this Noo Zilunder … I haven’t even sussed out shut up yet.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:44 pm252random guy

FACE!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:44 pm253Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Smoggy’s easily excitable.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:45 pm254Smoggy Batzrubble

True — but I stay hard for hours
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:46 pm255random guy

the metal rod is still in my head…….
why is it there?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

…..?
…-O—
…./l\
…./\
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:46 pm256Ben

hehe…yeah i know….you’re doing pretty good for a kiwi.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:47 pm257Smoggy Batzrubble

Proportionally, Kiwis lay the biggest egg of any bird in the world.

And you think Nun’s got a big one
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:48 pm258random guy

i got it out!!!!

….!
….O..l
…/l–l
…/\..l
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:48 pm259random guy

ok that stick figure is messed up
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:48 pm260Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Ummm… I don’t have a penis, Smoggy.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:50 pm261random guy

nun you have a dick?!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:52 pm262Nun Ur Damned Bizness

No, I think Smoggy’s a bit confused being from the bottom of the world and all.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:55 pm263random guy

ooooooh……

smoggy,
is it cold in antarctica?
on 10 Sep 2008 at 9:59 pm264anne johnson

My physical therapist said I’m not supposed to sit at the computer. But then my psychotherapist said that I could, because there’s no other way for me to avoid the fabulous prescription fun pack they gave me at the hospital.

God could smite Bill Gates by making him Chinese. God could smite Jerry Seinfeld by making him funny.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 10:00 pm265anne johnson

cracka was on a roll today. Must have graduated from Wheat Thin to Ritz.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 10:01 pm266Smoggy Batzrubble

If a bird lays a huge EGG–it must come out a huge HOLE.

Do you Americans think that eggs come out of penises?

No wonder you’re voting for Palin!

Look here

http://www.kamcom.co.nz/kiwi/kiwibreeding.htm
on 10 Sep 2008 at 10:01 pm267anne johnson

Seriously, if you’re ever in the hospital, tell them your pain level is 10. I couldn’t buy drugs this good down at the high school!
on 10 Sep 2008 at 10:03 pm268Nun Ur Damned Bizness

Anne,

All joking aside, I saw your blog and what you had done. I hope your recovery goes well.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 10:04 pm269anne johnson

MmmmmmmMMMMMMMMMMmmmmmmmmm… Microsoft …. MMMMMMMmmmmmm … Bill Gates ….. Sexual healing, baby …. MMMMmmmmm.

Prescription pharmaceuticals rock.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 10:04 pm270Smoggy Batzrubble

Yeah, good luck with all of it goddess annie
on 10 Sep 2008 at 10:07 pm271anne johnson

When I saw a scrip for valium with five refills I thought I’d won what was behind Door Number Three.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 10:09 pm272Tony Snow

anne,

Be careful what you blög on the fun pack, like drunk dialing.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 10:14 pm273Zeus

Anybody want a job at the US Department of the Interior -free blow and blowjobs from oil company employees. I didn’t think there were any attractive oil company employees: http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/09/10/AR2008091001829.html?hpid%3Dtopnews&sub=AR
on 10 Sep 2008 at 10:15 pm274Zeus

I like the “fun pack.”
on 10 Sep 2008 at 10:17 pm275Tony Snow

We all like the “fun pack”.
on 10 Sep 2008 at 10:19 pm276Tony Snow

Especially the DOI fun pack …

Many of those identified told investigators that they didn’t think ethics rules applied to them because of their “unique” role in the agency and that they needed to socialize with industry representatives for “market intelligence.”
on 11 Sep 2008 at 1:25 am277Omar

If my Devil Ray tickets don’t arrive in the mail by the 12th, God is going to get a kick in the nuts like he’s never had before..
on 11 Sep 2008 at 2:07 am278Smoggy Batzrubble

Oooh Omar! You’re tho thtwong… [swoon]
on 11 Sep 2008 at 4:00 am279Ben

tho twong? did i miss something? is that kiwi slang? shit i need to get up on that so i can kiwi it up.
on 11 Sep 2008 at 6:31 am280iamstillbetterthanyou

At least Bill Gates has left his legacy into some mildly entertaining individual named Steve Ballmer. Ballmer is a crazy bastard, thus making him a fucking legend.
on 11 Sep 2008 at 12:27 pm281Yo Yo Ma Ma

Smoggy, regarding your post # 266, I understood what you were saying. Either the rest of the bunch is on drugs, or are all effete losers cityboy losers who haven’t a clue as to where their morning breakfast and eggs comes from.
on 11 Sep 2008 at 1:49 pm282smoggy batzrubble

I run into problems of interpretation all the time Yo Mama.

Ben didn’t get my lisping baby-talk at 278 either (Omar–you’re so strong).

Must be my Noo Zillun iccent.
on 11 Sep 2008 at 4:47 pm283Omar

I was actually looking for a first visit “smiting”, but apparently God has chosen to overlook my threat of violent insolence. That or he has seen fit to guarantee my tickets shall arrive as promised. If that’s the case, I wish to thank The Lord in advance..
on 11 Sep 2008 at 4:50 pm284uppity cracka

if you want to get smited, God won’t smite you. ask anne johnson.
on 11 Sep 2008 at 11:43 pm285Omar

By the way, God, I saw the comment you left for me before you removed it earlier. Do you often delete your most Incredible Words or did infallibility take a holiday this afternoon? Not that I am looking to be smote or anything..
on 12 Sep 2008 at 12:42 am286God

HAH! Cracka reminded Me that I NEVER smite those who are looking to be smoten so I rewrote the Universe…I trust your stupid devil-ray tickets are already safely in your hands Omar.
on 12 Sep 2008 at 5:35 am287Tony Snow

Good one, God.

Nice smiting radio feeds also.

I listen to both #9 and #27 at once while watching FUNKTOP:

http://www.ssd.noaa.gov/goes/east/gmex/loop-ft.html
on 12 Sep 2008 at 2:51 pm288Omar

At the eleventh hour, my tickets (lower box I might add) finally arrive. You da man, God..
on 12 Sep 2008 at 10:25 pm289The Traveling Filipina

Dear Lord God, I hate to tell You this and I might get a mighty smiting for this but…

I think the blame might lay upon You since you blessed/cursed Bill Gates for having brains.

*runs away for the Rod of God is about to strike The Traveling Filipina upside the head*
on 16 Mar 2009 at 10:16 am290MA

God and the religions are all primitive and stupid.If real God excists, he would never create such a shitty world. So…THE GOD IS THE BIGGEST ASSHOLE OF UNIVERSE. BECAUSE HE SEEMS AS HE CAN NOT BE ANYTHING ELSE.